Sex and Intimacy: Manly man - FML

Manly man

By thelistman - 13/11/2009 19:04 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend made me shave my chest. Afterwards, she said I looked like I was 12. She won't have sex with me until it grows back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 408

You deserved it 5 146

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Same thing different taste

Shaving!

By John Doe - 07/01/2020 05:00

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend told me that if I shaved, my penis might seem bigger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 066

You deserved it 468

By JasonX0656 - 29/01/2017 06:00 - United States - Kalamazoo

Today, my fiancé asked me to do some manscaping. I got a little overzealous and now I look like a 12-year-old boy with razor burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 716

You deserved it 1 579

Freaked out

By Anonymous - 16/06/2020 02:02

Spicy

Today, I was about to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time. When I took my shirt off, she saw my chest acne. She ran out of my house and hasn't spoken to me in 5 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 150

You deserved it 263

Cuties

By Anonymous - 07/12/2020 02:02

Spicy

Today, I shaved my penis and balls. When my girlfriend saw, she said, "You look like my little brother." He's 6 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 911

You deserved it 462

By Anonymous - 25/12/2010 21:26 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend told me the reason she asked me to shave my beard. When I go down on her shaved, it feels more like her ex-boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 816

You deserved it 3 868

By Anonymous - 26/09/2010 09:26 - Vietnam

Today, I finally had the confidence to show my girlfriend my hairy chest/stomach. I'm very self conscious about it, and get embarrassed easily. She said I looked disgusting, called me Chewbacca and broke up with me on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 309

You deserved it 7 157

Not that into you

By Anonymous - 27/06/2023 12:00

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend won’t give me oral because she doesn't like pubes, so I trimmed them; she refused again because they felt prickly, so I waxed them. Now she says I look like a little boy. If she doesn’t want to suck cock, why won’t she just say so instead of hinting she might if I shaved? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 195

You deserved it 388

By Foxy0706 - 10/11/2015 19:27 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, I finally told my boyfriend I have a medical condition that makes me grow an unusual amount of hair on my face, so I shave every day. He said he was leaving me because he refuses to be with a "bearded lady". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 168

You deserved it 2 417

What should I do?

By Anonymous - 08/12/2019 20:00

Spicy

Today, I got a XXX wax, because my boyfriend wouldn't go down on me as he didn't like the hair. Now he won't sleep with me at all because I look like a child with no pubic hair, and he "feels like a pedophile." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 319

You deserved it 586

By hairless - 30/07/2010 06:45 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I got a XXX wax, because my boyfriend wouldn't go down on me as he didn't like the hair. Now he won't sleep with me at all because I look like a child with no pubic hair, and he "feels like a pedophile." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 443

You deserved it 10 124

Next

Top comments

BlackScorpionAng 0

Friday 13 November 2009 23:42

Your life is really ****** because you're pussy whipped. Your girlfriend "MADE" you shave your chest. I bet if you reach between your legs you wouldn't even feel your balls...you'd need to rummage threw her purse and find them to feel those babies now boy. And sadly, even after she "MADE" you preform for her, you still phailed... and she cut you off anyway. This is why your life is ******..it's not your naked chest, which no doubt she'll make fun of with her friends and probably her mother and then tell your friends about and never let you live down. You should reclaim your junk, pack you stuff and get the **** out before you're forced to wear her panties and bra for her amusement.

elannasdad 0

Friday 13 November 2009 23:43

Do her from behind

Comments

DameGreyWulf 0

Saturday 21 November 2009 23:34

Chest hair is manly. Maybe now she'll remember this. Remember: She's being deprived of sex too. .... or, at least you HOPE she is.

Poly_Amerose_345 1

Monday 23 November 2009 5:27

Woah dude youre whipped... and uhm hate to burst your bubble but the fact is she probably didnt want to **** you.

blackaut 0

Monday 23 November 2009 11:28

kukopia nailed it! hahahaha FYL for letting her work you over like that. grow a set maaaaaaaan

TehOnionUser 0

Friday 4 December 2009 17:09

YDI for dating a mentaly undeveloped girl. Like if this is what's love about...

superkitten_fml 0

Friday 11 December 2009 23:31

It's not up to your girlfriend whether you keep certain body hair or not, but at least she won't be doing it again :)

DarkerNukes 2

Wednesday 23 December 2009 19:33

When your hair grows back, refuse to have sex with her. She deserves it.

OasC82 0

Sunday 21 March 2010 5:29

Bro ur in control

TheNomNomRaptor 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 3:55

Maybe it's because you guys ARE 12...

Jeffoh1990 1

Thursday 11 August 2011 0:33

She wouldn't be saying that if you worked out and had nice chest and ab muscles.

superangryandy 2

Wednesday 24 August 2011 1:24

Never let a woman tell you how to treat your own body.

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend of a year told me he is at the point in his life where he is ready to start a family, get married and have a baby. He also casually stated that he wished he could meet someone he could see himself settling down with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 334

You deserved it 4 255

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my family. Everything went well until my mum started hitting the brandy. While kicked back in her chair, she asked my boyfriend how satisfactory I was in bed, and if he enjoyed going down on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 279

You deserved it 3 577

The Top

Today, my very quiet and sexually innocent boyfriend said, "I want to be inside you." I was so startled that all I could reply was, "Oh, thanks." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 731

You deserved it 1 473

Today, my husband was finally moving out. I picked up his enormous duffle bag full of clothes to help get him out faster, and I threw out my back. I now can't move. I can't even wipe my own ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 683

You deserved it 778

Today, after nearly 19 years, my Facebook account was permanently disabled because I'd banned too many scammers. I admin 58 groups, for over 2 million members, and have banned 50k+ fake accounts. One of them apparently reported me, and since Facebook runs some fake accounts, it was easier to ban me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 515

You deserved it 152

Today, I returned home to my girlfriend after being away for 6 weeks of work. I decided to take a shower and change before having a nice dinner with her. Without looking I grabbed a random pair of jeans from my closet to put on. They were Levis. I don't own or wear any Levis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 661

You deserved it 2 972

Today, I saved a kitten from the streets, cleaned her up and asked the vet what I should do with her because she was the sweetest thing and my cat has a highly contagious illness. The vet had to put her down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 037

You deserved it 125

Today, our new boss banned coffee from the workplace, comparing caffeine to hard drugs. His comparison may not be wrong; after two hours, I couldn't take it any more, and in between fantasising about his cold-blooded murder, I begged to be allowed just one last cup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 479

You deserved it 5 064