Relationships, Embarrassing and Work: Nice try

Nice try

By damn... - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a job conference. At lunch, I saw this stunning guy. At dessert time, I coughed so much that the piece of chocolate cake in my mouth went straight onto his glasses. I think it's too late to introduce myself now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 138

You deserved it 6 392

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Same thing different taste

Shit eating grin

By lame - 31/12/2009 05:02 - Canada

Today, I ate a chocolate bar before getting my morning coffee. While waiting for it, a good looking guy started talking to me, then suddenly lost interest. Afterwards, I saw the chocolate on my face in my car mirror. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 405

You deserved it 22 013

Mouth malfunction

By Melanie - 08/02/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I locked eyes with a cute barista and tried to flirt by giving a charming smile. I forgot I had just taken a sip of hot chocolate, so I ended up drooling a long stream of chocolate down my chin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 118

You deserved it 493

By Kamburgler - 02/07/2011 06:33 - United States

Today, this really cute guy at work kept flirting with me and cracking the funniest jokes. Before he left, he told me how much he enjoyed making me smile. An hour later, I saw my reflection in a mirror, I had a huge piece of food stuck in my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 393

You deserved it 5 726

Hi-de-hi

By Droolgirl - 26/05/2009 01:25 - United States

Today, I was at a fancy restaurant. I was drinking some water when I noticed a hot guy eating alone at another table waving at me. I smiled back, but had forgotten to swallow the water so it dribbled out of my mouth all over my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 257

You deserved it 46 583

By Noname - 23/01/2009 17:31 - United States

Today, at lunch, I told a bunch of people how I had been in love with this guy since freshman year. I made a bunch of jokes about how I was going to marry him and our kids would be so attractive. He was at the table next to mine and looked back at me as soon as I finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 158

You deserved it 18 370

Well, this is awkward

By Samantha - 29/03/2009 03:14 - Canada

Today, I was having lunch at a cafe. There was an attractive guy looking at me from another table. I smiled back and gave a little wink. A minute later he approached me. I introduced myself and asked if he wanted my number. He said, "Um, no but what are you eating? It looks really good" FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 205

You deserved it 21 873

NEXT!

By Kristie - 03/07/2024 12:00 - Australia

Today, I went on a blind date. Everything was going great until I laughed so hard at one of his jokes that I snorted, choked on my drink, and accidentally slapped his face while trying to cover my mouth. We didn't order dessert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 174

By emselin - 18/09/2012 20:07 - Denmark - Niv

Today, someone brought cake to class. Trying to get some attention from the guy I have a crush on, I asked if he wanted my piece of cake. He accepted it, and then offered it to another girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 698

You deserved it 5 025

Business casual

By Anonymous - 08/04/2013 08:30

Today, I had a lunch meeting with important people from my company. While drinking from my wine glass someone cracked a joke, causing me to snort a fountain of wine all over my lap, splashing the people next to me. The horrified look on my boss's face sitting opposite me said everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 264

You deserved it 5 592

By Anonymous - 07/01/2011 23:42 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a date for the first time in months. Over dessert, my date told a joke, and I tittered vigorously, causing me to choke and throw up all over him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 120

You deserved it 6 356

louisianagrrrrl 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 0:13

you should have coughed into your napkin

DisturbedDriver 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 12:54

Haha, you can use an apology in private to introduce yourself?

Comments

crazygirl13_fml 0

Friday 10 July 2009 17:32

learn to spell ass

Avenging_Angel 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 12:15

Lmao I love the way you worded this (:

popoman 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 3:58

COVER YOUR MOUTH, you inconsiderate person. I put FML and YDI.

LemonMan 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 5:29

You could have covered your mouth you know? I say YDI, but FYL that can be really akward

coltsluvr123 2

Saturday 27 February 2010 14:47

woooowwwww. next time cover your mouth!!!!!!!!!

TJT 0

Sunday 25 April 2010 4:03

Hmmmm stunning guys dont have glasses

happy_animal_lov 0

Saturday 29 May 2010 15:33

it's called turn away from the table and cover your mouth

kykeon22 0

Wednesday 11 August 2010 10:28

oh, not at all, i think that this is a great opportunity to break the ice XD XD

smartalek 2

Tuesday 14 June 2011 20:12

well what a nice conversation starter! (:

ladybug_26 18

Tuesday 19 July 2011 17:05

haha, oh bummer xD

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Keywords

Break-ups Love Relatable Work Engagement Coworkers I need your advice Awkward Parents School Parenting Kids Birthday Miscellaneous Cooking Cats Food Messy Embarrassing Weddings Dance Texting Health Poopoo peepee Clumsy Clothes Mental health Annoying Noise Money

The Top

Today, I received my soccer team jacket that I ordered a month ago. Trying to save money, I'd selected the "No name" option to avoid an extra $20 embroidering fee. My jacket now has "NO NAME" spelled out on the side of it, and I was charged the extra $20 dollars after all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 870

You deserved it 7 937

Today, my mom told my boyfriend all about how she had to be a parent volunteer when I was in kindergarten. Apparently I used to masturbate in class by rubbing myself against the edges of chairs and tables. The teacher thought it would be best if my mom was there to make me stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 157 290

You deserved it 18 052

The Top

Today, I was informed that- despite an already skeletal staff- my supervisor is leaving the company. Tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 376

You deserved it 335

Today, I have food poisoning. My boss told me that if I didn't come into work, I'd be fired. Not 30 minutes after sitting down, I sneezed and shat my pants. My boss still won't let me leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 938

You deserved it 2 193

Today, my son and I attended the funeral of a family friend. It went as well as any funeral could, up until the point that my apparently drunk son tried to grope the widow. I came an inch away from causing my son to need his own funeral. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 555

You deserved it 2 871

Today, I finally put my Christmas lights up. In the process, a branch from the bush in my yard smacked me in the face, giving me a very noticeable scar on my nose. I have a photo session tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 356

You deserved it 129

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me from jail, expecting me to bail him out. He'd tried to buy a load of booze at the liquor store and came up short by ten cents. The cashier refused to be short-changed, and he figured the only reasonable reaction was to punch her in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 146

You deserved it 4 664

Today, I got a call from my parents' divorce lawyer. When I answered the phone, she thought I was my mother and told me the details about my parent's divorce. I'm a 13-year-old boy who sounds like a woman and just learned that my parents are separating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 502

You deserved it 3 937