Intimacy: No kinkshaming on FML

No kinkshaming on FML

By Anonymous - 31/07/2013 16:28 - Belgium - Ieper

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 708

You deserved it 9 335

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Same thing different taste

By damnit - 16/10/2009 17:27 - United States

Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 718

You deserved it 4 273

Inactive

By inbogota - 06/03/2021 15:30 - Colombia

Today, I had the most action in months when I woke up to a wet dream. I'm married, I guess that tells you all about my sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 000

You deserved it 163

By Anonymous - 09/10/2010 05:15 - New Zealand

Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 266

You deserved it 9 787

By Anonymous - 17/01/2016 18:41 - United States - Valparaiso

Today, I was having a wet dream and had a pretty vivid imagination. I ended up thrusting so hard that it showed up in reality. I literally humped so hard that I woke myself up. Not only that, but I was sleeping on the living room floor so my roommates saw and now it's their joke of the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 711

You deserved it 3 993

By frankrizzo - 01/02/2009 17:29 - Canada

Today, I had a wet dream. When I woke up, I was touching myself. Unfortunately, I also woke up to find that I had fallen asleep on the couch after eating too much at a family reunion. When I looked around the room, over 10 relatives were giving me nasty looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 046

You deserved it 9 043

You probably do

By Anonymous - 09/08/2021 22:01

Today, I woke up after a really intense wet dream. Problem is, I'd fallen asleep in the living room. My little brother saw the whole thing. Now he's going around telling family I need to get some. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 150

You deserved it 231

Unfulfilled

By Anonymous - 28/03/2021 00:00 - Romania - Campina

Today, my alarm rang just as I was about to have a wet dream with my husband. This is the closest I got to having sex in weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 071

You deserved it 155

Poor pillow

By Randy Candy - 12/02/2021 17:01 - United States

Today, I was having a fantastic sex dream. So good, in fact, that I woke myself up breathing heavily and humping my pillow. I was at my friend's house and she saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 304

You deserved it 280

Hott

By disturbedgd - 03/04/2017 20:00 - South Africa - Durban

Today, I had my first steamy wet dream. It involved the Power Rangers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 180

You deserved it 1 110

You sleep in your pants?

By Anonymous - 01/03/2021 18:30 - United States - Randolph

Today, I dreamt that I was using the toilet. The toilet was a dream, but the rest wasn't. My pants were soaked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 813

You deserved it 154

Comet_Candy 23

Wednesday 31 July 2013 22:56

That must have been one sexy box!

studave 8

Wednesday 31 July 2013 22:56

I hope you didn't get a paper cut

Comments

thebomb553 5

Thursday 1 August 2013 0:17

It's a dick in a box!!!!

thebomb553 5

Thursday 1 August 2013 0:19

This FML sounds like Weird Al' Yankovic combined with the lonely island.

katdaiken 16

Thursday 1 August 2013 0:20

It least you wouldn't had to have worried about bush But damn that'd be dry

NightHawk387 22

Thursday 1 August 2013 1:08

Are you saying bush is bad?

snegma 16

Thursday 1 August 2013 0:43

well the companion cube is just so damn sexy.

darkangel21492 10

Thursday 1 August 2013 1:03

I know someone who had the same dream... and told all his coworkers... years ago.. but he lives in the United States...

Dashelle 25

Thursday 1 August 2013 1:39

At least we know you will never be (card)bored.

AngelLovesDerby 10

Thursday 1 August 2013 1:56

Hahahahaha!! To funny but sad....

AzWolf 5

Thursday 1 August 2013 2:20

Sex is sex. Keep up the good work.

ZombieKnickers_fml 8

Thursday 1 August 2013 2:24

Are you Solid Snake?

Xotoolyxo 16

Thursday 1 August 2013 2:28

It's okay no one has to know about your odd fantasies unless you'd like them too

FretMasterLive 4

Thursday 1 August 2013 2:38

SNAAAAKE!!!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my dad has been faking social anxiety to make me feel like there's something wrong with me. How do I know? Because I actually have social anxiety, and he not only shows no symptoms of it, but he also has a lot of misconceptions about it that he would know are false if he actually did have it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 809

You deserved it 180

Today, my dad came home from work complaining about all the people he'd seen. He said he doesn't understand why so many people with problems have to confide in him. He's a psychologist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 694

You deserved it 3 323

The Top

Today, I'm in a polyamorous relationship. My husband and my boyfriend are both aware and are okay with it. Today they met. Not only are they okay with each other, they’ve hit it off. They've drafted a schedule of which days they want, meals, and chores for me on those days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 161

You deserved it 908

Today, I was supposed to present a speech on diabetes. The girl who went first chose the same subject, knowing I'm diabetic and that it was my topic. I went last, so I had to change half of my speech on the spot. I sounded ignorant about my own illness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 046

You deserved it 6 526

Today, I overheard my ripped, handsome, genetically perfect brother telling my mom how "fat people" make him "nervous". I have only recently accepted my weight, after struggling for years. I now understand why my brother rarely talks to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 426

You deserved it 6 909

Today, I met separately with the President and Chairman of the company regarding a product that I'm designing. Each ordered me to do the opposite of whatever the other instructed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 214

You deserved it 2 389

Today, I work for the local fire department. I had a long call and I was hot and sweaty. I decided to skinny dip in my pool because it was still dark out. Everything went great untill my flood light went on and my dad ran out with a bat. I got smacked in the side with a baseball bat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 937

You deserved it 6 547

Today, I so obviously dozed off during a video call at work. Afterwards, my manager messaged me asking if I was OK. I was mortified, and now I'm "on his watch." FML

I agree, your life sucks 119

You deserved it 407