Sports and Animals: On the run

On the run

By broussimousse - 10/03/2009 20:42 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a run with this cute guy I know. I was sweating untractively and profusely so I decided to discretly grab a leaf from a tree and wipe my face with it. A bird had done the same with his ass few minutes ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 064

You deserved it 32 624

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Same thing different taste

By lbg2msf - 06/11/2013 18:08 - United States - Biloxi

Today, I walked under a tree and heard birds chirping from above. I stopped and looked up, only to catch a face full of bird shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 849

You deserved it 9 501

By birdbath - 08/11/2009 07:26 - United States

Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 898

You deserved it 3 639

By crazystar69 - 09/03/2011 18:19 - United States

Today, I was walking with my crush, and I told him how I felt. As soon as I turned to him, a bird shit on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 950

You deserved it 4 834

By schmoodles - 07/05/2009 00:20 - United States

Today, as I was running a cute guy was coming towards me. As he was passing me, he yelled "nice tush!" I said thanks and slapped my ass flirtatiously. He stopped running, laughed and pointed to my crotch, replying "No, I said nice BUSH" I looked down to see my shorts had rode up a bit too high. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 805

You deserved it 70 912

By Rizma - 27/11/2014 15:12 - France - Grâces

Today, I went off for a jog. Outside, I saw my really cute neighbour, so in an effort to appear fit, I accelerated and kept my head up. As I got close, I smiled at him, just as a huge fly flew right up my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 989

You deserved it 4 573

Smooth

By Anonymous - 16/04/2023 12:00 - United Kingdom - Blackpool

Today, I was out for a jog when I saw my ex-boyfriend walking towards me. I tried to duck behind a tree to avoid him, but I slipped on a plastic bag and fell into a lovely patch of mud. He saw the whole thing and walked away smirking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 546

By poisonivyretard - 04/06/2013 17:15 - United States - Narragansett

Today, I took a dump in the woods at a secluded lake. I used the leaves of a seemingly harmless tree to clean myself. However, I was unaware that the leaf was poisonous. It feels like a thousand hornets are attacking my ass-crack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 550

You deserved it 52 003

By Eli123 - 01/05/2009 00:52 - United States

Today, I went for a run. I noticed a really hot guy mowing his lawn. I ran a couple of laps past him. After a while, when I slowed down, I smiled at him, and he said, "You look really hot." I thanked him, and he quickly replied, "No, I mean you're sweating a lot." FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 499

You deserved it 51 816

By Tom - 06/06/2017 11:00 - United States - Antelope

Today, I went for my usual morning run. Halfway through, I needed to pee, so I found a perfect bush… to walk in on a lady who had also stopped to pee. I was called a pervert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 510

You deserved it 459

Autumn vibes

By Robbo - 26/10/2024 22:00 - United States - New York

Today, I went for a jog to enjoy the fall weather. I tripped over a tree root and fell face-first into a pile of leaves. As I tried to get up, a bunch of kids had gathered to laugh, and one even shouted something about, “A grown-ass man playing in the leaves!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 346

You deserved it 87

lolajelly 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 1:22

why the hell would you use a leaf? tempted by their amazing absorbent properties??

stephfml 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 1:17

hahah you shouldve just used your shirt

Comments

vitaminsandminer 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 3:36

i dont understand why you used a leaf... how would that help?

alyssa_22 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 3:45

Wow I've never heard of someone wiping their face sweat with a leaf. In any case, you could have at least looked at the leaf first.

Dhansta 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 3:48

you wanna hope he never sees you spell as well

mrcarmine 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 5:34

that was pretty unreasonable of you in so many ways lol

meandmoi_fml 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 6:35

You got shitfaced while jogging with a guy...I would be impressed.

simplysmile 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 6:53

who cares if you are sweating? don't be lame. besides, being sweaty is sexy to guys....sometimes hahaha

commonsense31 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 7:05

I don't even know what to say besides this is utter stupidity the guy would probably rather have a generally smart sweaty girl rather then one that tries wiping sweat with a leaf. f***ing A a leaf really you shouldve grabbed a small dog instead lmfao or maybe bring a sweat towel? Hmm too simple forgot hahaha

gqduck 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 9:26

Just so you know, a guy isn't going to blame you for sweating while working out. In fact, he might even like it a lot

cantth1nk0fnam3 3

Wednesday 11 March 2009 10:54

why would you use a leaf

audiogasmic 0

Wednesday 11 March 2009 17:04

First, why the **** would you use a leaf? That's what your shirt sleeve is for.. Secondly, if you feel comfortable enough with him to go running there should be a level of understanding between you two that you're both going to be sweaty and gross. If you are of the superficial mindset that you always have to look like you just stepped out of a music video around him, then you'll never start dating him anyways. Sorry, that was kind of harsh. >.>