Miscellaneous: Pick me up - FML

Pick me up

By Ugh - 15/11/2009 17:55 - United States

Today, I was really depressed so I talked on the phone with my best friend. She was telling me how a guy she really liked complimented her. I told her it was be nice to get at least one compliment. After a long silence she says, "You're really good with computers." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 437

You deserved it 5 911

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Same thing different taste

By asdfjkl - 06/09/2009 17:27 - United States

Today, I had a long, meaningful telephone conversation. After hanging up, I realized I hadn't had such a great conversation in a long time. Who was it with? The Dell Customer Support guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 229

You deserved it 5 655

By Anonymous - 24/06/2009 02:50 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was upset, so I tried to cheer her up by telling her how much I love her and how beautiful she is. After a minute, her face started to light up. I thought it had worked until I realized that she was being cheered up by the friends she was talking to online. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 186

You deserved it 3 789

By Seabiscuit - 06/07/2009 04:03 - United States

Today, I was snuggling in bed with my girlfriend. She was depressed, so I complimented her strong legs, saying they were "like a horse." I spent the next hour and a half trying to stop her crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 491

You deserved it 77 756

Honestly?

By a_boring_snuffkin - 16/05/2020 02:00

Today, my friend needed to talk out bad feelings. Then she urged me to open up as well. I hate doing it, but it only seemed fair, so I confessed my deep insecurities. Not only did she agree with everything, but she also helpfully added that I'm boring, have no life, and all my dreams are unattainable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 837

You deserved it 209

Spoke too soon

By Oops - 06/02/2010 08:17 - Australia

Today, I was talking to a female friend online. She was typing out a story bit by bit about how awful she was feeling after being teased. I was responding with, "So, so true" but because of my slow typing it appeared after she wrote, "Doesn't help being fat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 045

You deserved it 6 088

By fothermuckerrr - 14/05/2010 04:07 - United States

Today, my best friend told me that she is only my friend because she is prettier than me and being my friend boost her confidence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 066

You deserved it 3 325

The one with the phone addiction

By Anonymous - 29/06/2019 05:15

Today, after feeling like I've been sucking as a friend and contacting a friend who has called me their best friend, but doesn't talk to me much, we grabbed a coffee. The whole time I was trying to have a conversation, she was on her phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 571

You deserved it 194

By that guy - 24/05/2012 16:41 - United States

Today, I realized the only reason my phone ever rings is because someone needs help with their computer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 886

You deserved it 2 291

By dis_bee_leaf - 13/02/2012 16:27 - Canada

Today, I sent out a text saying "Smile! You're beautiful and don't let anyone tell you otherwise." to most of my contacts. I got one reply, from my best friend, saying, "Are you fucking stupid?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 798

You deserved it 37 921

By 27musiclover - 16/08/2009 14:41 - United States

Today, my best friend told me I'm the friend who no one really likes. This was after I had bought her lunch, ice cream, and a ticket to a movie we were going to see that day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 654

You deserved it 5 153

Next

Top comments

s_p_a_r_k 0

Sunday 15 November 2009 20:05

YDI for fishing for compliments

tkarin 0

Sunday 15 November 2009 20:06

I'd love to be told I was good with computers.

Comments

lucasj23 11

Sunday 20 May 2018 23:22

I guess I'm missing the fml part of this.

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Health Accident ADHD Medication Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I have a stutter that gets worse with stress. We got a new supervisor today and the first thing she said to me was, “Either spit it out or write it in an email, for fuck's sake!” I’m now so scared of her, I go almost mute if we’re in the same room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 533

You deserved it 93

Today, my longtime crush, who turned me down because he’s “sick of women”, just got into a relationship. He made it Facebook official, with photos of them and everything. Wanting to even the score, I commented, “So it seems your sickness of women is cured, huh?” He bitched at me for “ruining his moment” and deleted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 111

You deserved it 1 029

The Top

Today, I was watching the episode of New Amsterdam where a man's cancer goes into remission very abruptly. As the doctors wonder how the hell that's possible, my mom says, "God." Okay. So if this "God" controls what happens to your body, why is cancer still a thing? My mom is no longer religious. She's delusional. FML

I agree, your life sucks 665

You deserved it 287

Today, my boss rang me for the 5th time on my day off. Frustrated I pushed 'ignore' and yelled a string of obscenities at my phone. Turns out I pushed 'talk'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 564

You deserved it 50 938

Today, I overheard my boyfriend complaining that I’m lazy since I never cook for him. I stopped cooking for him because he constantly complained that the food was never as good as what his ex-wife made, or like his mom made. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 322

You deserved it 158

Today, I found out that when you kick another man in the snowglobes and he smiles at you, there's something creepily wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 317

You deserved it 7 529

Today, I got into my truck after a long day at work, only to notice that a large section of the seats and doors had been destroyed by a feral cat that had somehow gotten trapped inside. I’m still not sure how it got in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 76

Today, I'm 3 months pregnant and have seemingly started having sex dreams about other men. Last night, I had a passionate affair with an older man. Who was it? Joe Bastianich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 773

You deserved it 206