Intimacy: Pleased to see me?

Pleased to see me?

By kappaomicron - 19/01/2010 23:18 - United Kingdom

Today, I got out of bed and went downstairs in my boxers to get a glass of water. I entered the kitchen and said hi to my visiting mother-in-law, who smiled. Only after a good ten minutes did she decide to tell me that my knob was hanging from a gap in my boxers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 242

You deserved it 6 722

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/08/2009 19:28 - United States

Today, I lazily answered the door in my pajamas. It was my elderly neighbor asking to borrow a can opener. Despite the strange and unwarranted scowl she was giving me I obliged. It wasn't until after she had left that I notice my penis was completely sticking out through the flap in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 962

You deserved it 21 614

Let it all dangle

By Anonymous - 08/10/2023 07:30 - United States

Today, my 76 year-old mother-in-law stayed the night at our house. I bumped into her on the way to the bathroom during the night. She discovered I sleep naked. Sadly, I found out that she does, too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 352

You deserved it 788

By Tinker-Bell - 21/11/2008 03:41 - France

Today, when I woke up, my husband was already up. Thinking I'd heard him in the hall, I yelled out, "Come on, don't be shy, bring your dick back in here right now!" A voice then replied, "He's gone out to get some bread." It was my mother-in-law. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 231

You deserved it 18 016

A good yanking

By Gordon - 22/07/2009 14:12 - United States

Today, I was standing by the bed, naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opened the door and walked over to me, swinging her hips, wearing practically nothing. At about four feet from me, she tripped on the edge of the floor mat, and used my junk to catch herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 733

You deserved it 6 765

Just a question

By Anonymous - 14/12/2019 14:00

Today while I was about to go into the shower, my mom walked in on me while I was naked. She looked down and asked me if I was cold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 076

You deserved it 258

By Embarassed - 10/09/2009 05:32 - Canada

Today, I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. At least, I thought I did, until I woke up to my pants, sheets, and boyfriend all soaking wet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 600

You deserved it 8 131

By Sicko - 28/08/2010 23:52 - France

Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching TV and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 964

You deserved it 26 083

Tell, don't show

By Anonymous - 20/09/2020 10:07

Today, while masturbating, I got a huge migraine so I went into the kitchen to get an Advil. As I was getting it, my family was staring at me and I couldn't figure out why. I walked out and realized that I hadn't put my pants back on. I just walked downstairs fully torqued in front of my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 632

You deserved it 2 595

By mongoosemike - 07/06/2011 05:55

Today, I walked downstairs, made a bowl of hot cereal, and held a full conversation with my brother's girlfriend, before I finally put two and two together and realized I hadn't put any pants on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 838

You deserved it 29 535

By hellphone_fml - 01/07/2019 20:00

Today, someone knocked on my door. I yelled "Yeah?" while getting up, since it was locked. My grandpa walked in, as I apparently didn't actually lock it. I was naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 379

You deserved it 659

yakturk43 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 0:19

win for saying wankerstick lol

bhangu023 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 0:26

ahaha u shud of been like i'm givin it som morning fresh air

Comments

Shystai 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 3:20

How did you not realize...wow...YDI

CSB7 4

Friday 22 January 2010 1:17

that's what I wanna know lol he must have a small one! haha

ninjasmurf 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 3:22

number 16: your ugly and retarded.. its a guy with his shirt off get used to it, your gunna see that plenty in your life so stfu. and lol whod wanna see u in your bra and underwear anyways..

paramorefan125 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 3:33

ahahahahaha wankerstick wtf dude lolololololol wow

razorp 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 3:36

I've done that before, but it was my house cleaner thAt got a peak

bedbug1234 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 3:37

sexy. how big is it

_shakalaka_ 9

Wednesday 20 January 2010 4:02

isn't it better to call it wankING stick? anyway abt tat incident...come on let the old hogg have some, she's prolly deprived and shit..hence it took her 10 mins to fell you!