Pregnancy, Smells and Health: Smells like… victory

Smells like… victory

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, they're pumping out the septic system in the building next door. I'm three months pregnant, suffering from morning sickness, and can smell everything within a three-mile radius. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 696

You deserved it 3 944

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 21/04/2009 15:15 - United States

Today, my husband and I were looking for a new house. The open house we were in had a strange floral scent to entice the buyers. I am three months pregnant and have horrible morning sickness. I threw up all over the living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 253

You deserved it 4 804

By Anonymous - 16/03/2013 17:31 - Sweden - Karlskrona

Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I'm pregnant, though I don't really suffer from morning sickness. I do however suffer from sympathy puking, which kicked in with horrifying consequences when someone burst in and started vomiting in one of the other stalls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 946

You deserved it 2 576

By Anonymous - 14/02/2019 16:35 - United States

Today, I am 3 months pregnant. While lying on the couch with morning sickness, my boyfriend farted loudly and filled the room with a smell so horrifying that I immediately threw up all over my coffee table. He spent the next 20 minutes texting his friends about this "epic" moment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 910

You deserved it 7 954

By soapisyourfriend - 16/02/2016 06:53 - United States - Ashland

Today, cable was installed at my house and the cable guy smelled like some horrid mix of cabbage and cheese. I'm pregnant and suffering from morning sickness. I've sprayed air freshener, lit candles, and opened windows despite the cold outside. I can't get rid of the smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 915

You deserved it 1 423

By radiating - 09/03/2012 04:53

Today, my hay-fever started. I'm five months pregnant, and every time I cough, sneeze or blow my nose I either fart or wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 776

You deserved it 3 218

Capitalism 101

By Anonymous - 25/09/2019 02:02

Today, a massive septic tank that takes waste from 11 factories exploded. The wind is blowing directly towards us. Even with closed windows, no amount of perfume helps. There's no escape. People have puked. We've still got 4 hours of production and management doesn't care about the workers outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 869

You deserved it 115

By Anonymous - 16/03/2016 16:21 - United States - Dayton

Today, I'm seven months pregnant and going to college. I had to use the bathroom, but all of the bathrooms at my building were closed, so I had to walk to the next building, a block away. I didn't make it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 874

You deserved it 2 066

Hilarious

By Anonymous - 01/02/2012 20:21 - United States

Today, my morning sickness has been so bad that my husband's farts send me running to the bathroom. He thinks it's hilarious, and has been following me around all day trying to crack one off in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 281

You deserved it 4 015

By Anonymous - 10/02/2016 16:57 - United States - Avon

Today, there was an issue with the sewage system at work. It smelled like somebody took a turd, left it in the sun to marinate, threw up on it, then put in the air conditioning to fill the store with nauseating stink. I nearly threw up multiple times because we weren't allowed to leave early. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 303

You deserved it 1 384

Barf

By sickatwokr - 30/06/2015 20:26 - Australia

Today, while alone in the childcare centre I work at, one of the children farted bad enough to trigger my morning sickness. Because I was alone, I couldn't leave the room, which resulted in me throwing up into a 2-year-old-sized toilet, while 12 toddlers either watched or ran wild. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 951

You deserved it 1 872

perdix 29

Friday 23 October 2009 23:09

Go four miles away. I didn't realize that pregnancy impaired one's logic so much.

DoomJeff91 2

Friday 23 October 2009 23:16

That's one smell of a power. Use it for good, not evil.

Comments

_whatever_77 0

Friday 23 October 2009 23:39

That's what you get for reproducing. YDI.

alison89 0

Friday 23 October 2009 23:43

i don't understand why you just don't leave

sjx 0

Saturday 24 October 2009 2:43

Maybe because she has morning sickness and feels shitty?

txgirl09 5

Friday 23 October 2009 23:43

At least you'll eventually stop having morning sickness and you'll have your new son or daughter.

hazardharry 0

Saturday 24 October 2009 0:13

unless it's a hermaphrodite

kar89 0

Saturday 24 October 2009 6:51

actually, they consider those boys.... if one does a crime, they will put in man jail

welderchick87 0

Friday 23 October 2009 23:56

So why not just go to a friends house for the day? Nobody is keeping you in your house but yourself.

ToTaLLYNo1UKnow 0

Saturday 24 October 2009 0:00

You're Pregnant?Congrats.Although The Septic Thing Sucks...

Amkii 0

Saturday 24 October 2009 0:18

You can smell someone burp from 3 miles away?! Damn, I am IMPRESSED!!

kieffa 0

Saturday 24 October 2009 0:29

You're pregnant? Yup, that's an fml if i've ever heard one! lol

alwaysalady 0

Saturday 24 October 2009 0:37

When I was pregnant I kept dryer sheets on me to block unplsent smells. not sure that will help in a situation this extreme, but its worth a shot

thisisme83 0

Saturday 24 October 2009 0:40

Everyone is saying why don't you just leave, but did anyone think, maybe she was working or something, so she COULDN'T leave? Just a thought...

Morokea 0

Saturday 24 October 2009 0:42

Wow you guys are assholes, lol. All I can say is that sucks...

Keywords

Cats Poopoo peepee Gross Animals Awkward Smells Love Miscellaneous Embarrassing Painful Health First Dates Work Christmas Music Grieving Social Media Boredom Anniversary Intimacy Abuse Ironic Drunk AITA Am I overreacting? Transportation Alcohol Gun control Kids Parents

The Top

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me and told me to untag him in a picture I posted of us on Facebook. Apparently his girl best friend saw the photo and got upset with him because he never told her about our relationship. She’s no longer speaking to him and he blames me. We’ve been dating for 7 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 98

Today, I decided to have sex with with my boyfriend. After we had finished, I jokingly said, "Who's going to sleep in the wet patch?" He got up and said, "You're optimistic, I'm not staying. Oh, and I'm dumping you, that performance was disappointing." It was my first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 574

You deserved it 4 529

The Top

Today, I went to the doctor's. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 794

You deserved it 112

Today, after I inherited 300 grand last year and blew it all on drugs, I'm now kicking myself in the ass for not blowing it all on drugs AND hookers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 99

You deserved it 807

Today, I went to Houston to help with hurricane relief and to donate supplies. Later, I realized that I'd accidentally donated a bag that had my brand new truck keys in it. I've been waiting for 5 hours already to find it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 445

You deserved it 886

Today, after I sold the bulk of my employer-granted stocks last week, assuming its the highest price the stock would reach in a while, it's now nearly 30% higher to the price I sold at. FML

I agree, your life sucks 714

You deserved it 409

Today, after three days of dating a boy I liked, he came out as gay on his Instagram. FML

I agree, your life sucks 904

You deserved it 137

Today, my neighbor's pesky 7-year-old daughter, who is friends with the guy I really like, decided to help me with him. She used her phone to send him a picture of me. I was in the shower, completely naked and surprised. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 110

You deserved it 777