Painful, Injury, Scary and Miscellaneous: Stealth mode

Stealth mode

By Slipperywhenwet - 28/02/2009 13:08 - United States

Today, I was stepping out of the shower while home alone. I heard voices coming from the living room. I grabbed a bat to defend myself and ran into the living room. I slipped on my tile floor and smashed my TV with the bat. No one was in my house, but I'd left the radio on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 631

You deserved it 48 170

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Same thing different taste

By ShowerGirl - 30/04/2013 07:54 - United States

Today, while I was in the shower, I heard a door slam. Assuming it was my fiancé, I shouted "I love you!" I later opened the bathroom door to see my stereo and television missing. I'd said "I love you" to whoever robbed my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 658

You deserved it 5 705

Surprise!

By BadKitty - 11/09/2016 13:37 - Australia - Invermay

Today, I woke up to a loud bang. Thinking someone had broken in, I grabbed my hunting knife and ran downstairs, only to find my TV on the floor, completely destroyed, and my cat casually sitting next to it without a care in the world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 939

You deserved it 1 278

By Lilly_28 - 11/08/2009 14:01 - United States

Today, I was home alone. I didn't expect anyone to be anywhere near home, so when I got out of the shower, I walked to the living room, naked, to get the tv remote for my room. Only to find the UPS guy standing at our glass front door. I screamed... so did he. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 981

You deserved it 18 451

Panic! In the Bathroom

By MAWZ - 19/07/2011 06:33 - United States

Today, while I was showering, my brother thought it would be funny to burst through the door pretending he was a burglar. Panicked, I went to grab the soap bar as a weapon, slipped, fell, and hit my head on the faucet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 747

You deserved it 5 160

Who goes there?

By dontbadouche - 01/02/2010 13:45 - Senegal

Today, I heard the sound of footsteps in the basement. Thinking it was burglars I grabbed a baseball bat and hurried down the stairs. I then tripped on the stairs, fell down them and smacked my head on the bat. The sound of footsteps I heard? It was my cat playing in some cardboard boxes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 738

You deserved it 7 271

By youjustsuck - 25/07/2011 18:07 - United States

Today, I was home alone, and enjoying my freedom decided to walk around naked blaring my radio. What my mother forgot to tell me before she left was that a guy was coming to fix our dish washer today. Imagine our mutual surprise as I danced around the kitchen while getting a drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 264

You deserved it 12 787

Bad start to the day

By Concussed - 17/01/2010 06:22 - Australia

Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 733

You deserved it 6 071

By johnboy - 09/11/2010 17:08 - United States

Today, I went for a run. When I got home, no one was there so I took off my clothes and laid on the cool wood floor. I decided to call my girlfriend and we started talking in baby voices. That's when my mom walked into the house witnessing everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 835

You deserved it 37 146

Freaky

By Anonymous - 28/01/2016 20:24 - United States - Honolulu

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. I was there with the lights out when something ran across my foot. I freaked out, tried to kick it off, and ended up smashing my foot into the side of the tub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 405

You deserved it 3 188

Brain fart

By jonjon - 13/06/2010 13:16 - United States

Today, after spending the evening with friends, I went home and realized that the living room light was on. Thinking someone was robbing me, I hid behind a bush. I got impatient and crept up to the door. Then I remembered that I'd left the light on before I left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 961

You deserved it 47 320

Seegtease 0

Saturday 28 February 2009 20:32

Why is your TV in a room with a tile floor? And if this was your bathroom, why was your bat handy in the bathroom? This smells.

meridith 0

Saturday 28 February 2009 20:11

At least it would have made sense if you smashed the RADIO with a bat.

Comments

klassic09 0

Wednesday 4 March 2009 4:33

love #13.. haha this is awesome.

ellieFITCH 0

Wednesday 4 March 2009 17:52

Omg you guys. This is pathetic, people on here pick on random small parts in an FML and start ranting about it. Are you just being douchebags for the sake of it or are you just not getting any?

fmylife13 0

Friday 6 March 2009 2:57

He shouldn't be able to read your texts, that's gotta be some sort of illegal

Shallow_Padentic 0

Saturday 21 March 2009 5:06

Rotflmao to 26 haha to 17,5,27,28. #42 is kinda right. The point is this is funny as hell and instead of trying to make sense of it all, just laugh. Just laugh.