Tense situation

By mother to be - 04/08/2014 13:20 - United States

Today, while talking to my sister, I explained to her that the reason I hope I end up having a girl is I want my daughter to love me the way I "used" to love my own mother. I didn't mean to say it in the past tense. My sister told my mom. She's planning my baby shower. FML
I agree, your life sucks 38 967
You deserved it 7 092
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Top comments

ApollosMyth 22

Just explain what you meant to your mom. If she doesn't understand, than that's just sad.

198 3
scice03 8

Oh good grief, your sister is a tattle tail. It was an honest mistake, and I'm sure you meant "used to" as in "when you were a child". Just explain it to your mom, and tell your sister to cool it.

168 1

Comments

darwinism 30

Tell her you will name your daughter after her. If that doesn't work, just say "I loved you more than I loved dad".

2 19
PhilSnake22 13

Both of those suggestions are quite terrible.

10 1
ImRJ 7

Too bad. Me? I would go all Dexter on you before you think of moving a step.

2 20
SystemofaBlink41 27

Um... What?

7 0
CommanderWoof 10

Her statement is perfectly grammatically and semantically correct, and does not imply *in any way* a cessation of love for her mother. Any rephrasing to avoid use the past tense would result and an unnecessarily awkward sentence. Even the younger sister would understand this; and was just being a rabblerouser. I cannot even think of a phrasing off of the top of my head that doesn't use the past tense at some point - it is impossible, because the OP is expressing feelings felt in the past, that have matured and thus changed today. The context of the phrase provides the unspoken clause: "used to love my mother (at that age)". This sentence shows continued admiration for her mother, as well as the presumed maturation and natural evolution of daughterly affection. Even if there were known animosity between mother and daughter today, the phrasing is still affectionate, and would show remorse for the current negative turn in the relationship. The phrasing was perfectly proper, and could not be phrased differently without considerable effort. There is no room for misinterpretation (except of course deliberate and irrational misinterpretation.)

34 5
SaturnV 25

Very well said. Even if the sister did genuinely misinterpret OP's statement, what positive outcome (pertaining to OP, anyway) could she possibly hope to achieve by relaying that conversation back to their mother? It seems to me that her intentions were almost certainly malicious.

9 0
nix1993 41

If she's anything like my sister, she's probably jealous of the attention OP is getting for being pregnant and providing a grandchild. It's amazing how even a mature adult can turn into a spiteful brat when faced with what they view as 'competition'.

8 0
feelingold 18

30 - sadly I suspect you are right.We get older but those petty sibling rivalries never quite go away!

1 0
shay_serendipity 29

17's comment was exceptionally written and well thought out. Using a wide vocabulary I see. You, my friend, deserve a medal for actually showing intellectual knowledge in a comment unlike some people commenting here. Kudos to you! :)

8 2
worldclassrager 39

Either she'll be really klingy or make your life hell for a bit...at least lets hope a bit

0 2
chrisdw93 4

If you really do love her as much as you meant to say, then I'm sure she will forgive your slip up.

0 0
darryaz 9

This makes total sense to me. You love your mother differently now as an adult than you did when you were a small child. Hopefully your Mom will get it too.

3 0
sorahearts_fml 10

Snitches get stitches and end up in ditches with other bitches.

4 0
Dellipop 12

If this happened to me, my sister and I would laugh at my accidental miss use of words as she would know what I was meaning to say. And if she did repeat it to my mother she would laugh also knowing the truth making the slip in words amusing.

0 0