The all-seeing eye

By Anonymous - 28/10/2011 02:49 - United States

Spicy
Today, I was about to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time. Just as she took her shirt off, her phone rang. It was her mom, demanding she return home. Now I've been cockblocked, and my girlfriend's mom seems to be a goddamn clairvoyant. Awesome. FML
I agree, your life sucks 34 328
You deserved it 5 796
November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

RecklessJellyBea 7

Women's intuition. Now the ultimate cockblock.

128 9

Comments

youngbuck10 9

Don't hate, **********!

18 2
gatorsfan100 1

Ooo ya! That's what my Friday nights consist of!!

2 0
youngbuck10 9

Haha, that's too funny.

1 0
bizarre_ftw 21

I love the way this is phrased.

3 2
TipOfTheHat 10

I predict many more nights like this for you!

0 0
perdix 29

She probably texted her mom 5 minutes earlier with "the signal." She's playing you for the flowers and the dinners and the movies without having to put out. Pretty clever trick, huh?

23 4
every1luvsboners 11

She has the app on her phone to receive the fake phone call, just for awkward situations like this. She's probably at a bukake party laughing at you while she's taking DVDA from random guys for crack and heroin. Damnit Perdix, why you stealing my shit?

9 4
bizarre_ftw 21

He's not, you two are the same person, you just don't know it yet. Think the dream lord meets Siamese twins

4 4
perdix 29

Because great minds think alike . . . so do demented ones.

9 1
bizarre_ftw 21

I prefer the latter, when you have a demented mind the box is a washcloth

3 4
bizarre_ftw 21

*facepalm* I think I was just ******/raped by dumb luck >.<

3 2
leadman1989 15

I put more than that!!! My comment was. 69 - hahaha (I know I'm a child) That's a great way of putting it because I'm always writing things and thinking THERE'S NO WAY I CAN POST THIS!! (in refrence to you washcloth comment! That's not it exactly but I was basically agreeing with what you said. I think this is the FML crews idea of a cruel joke!

5 0
imaweiner00 5

the instinct of a mother never fails..

1 1
bizarre_ftw 21

Then how do you explain teen pregnancy?

6 1
NAU_future 7

Just because they have the instinct doesnt mean they act on it or pay attention to it.

2 1
bizarre_ftw 21

Wouldn't that technically equal failing?

5 1
tmrwisanotherday 1

Don't ever go back, I think she tells her mom everything!!

0 2