Relatable, Argument and Love: The best part of breaking up…

The best part of breaking up…

By Anonymous - 19/10/2009 23:51 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours, hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming, "I meant it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 046

You deserved it 8 844

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Same thing different taste

By *facefloor* - 24/07/2012 20:08 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 073

You deserved it 5 417

By Anonymous - 03/12/2012 11:53 - Canada

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 092

You deserved it 4 194

By ouch - 29/03/2011 03:33 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 659

You deserved it 16 856

By Anonymous - 01/11/2014 18:23 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 857

You deserved it 5 521

By Anonymous - 21/06/2016 23:24 - United States - Winder

Today, my girl and I got in a huge fight. Because I cuddled with her the wrong way. While I was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 560

You deserved it 1 090

By nokeys - 02/04/2009 20:16 - United States

Today, I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend after driving 200 miles to see him. While arguing, I told him I never wanted to see him again and left after slamming the front door. I left my car keys in his kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 794

You deserved it 59 091

This ain't working out

By just a reaction - 17/08/2020 23:09

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a heated argument. He raised his hand like he was going to hit me. Having been hit by my ex before, I panicked and instinctively kicked his legs out from under him. He then dumped me because he said he was just gonna scare me, but I used real violence on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 056

You deserved it 337

Self-fulfilling prophecy

By Dave - 04/10/2012 14:44 - United States

Today, I woke up after having a nightmare that my girlfriend broke up with me. Needing reassurance, I told her about it. She became furious with me saying that she'd never do that and called me an "inconsiderate fucking bastard for even thinking that." Then she broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 930

You deserved it 3 807

It was an accident!

By innocent - 06/01/2014 21:32 - Australia

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 017

You deserved it 7 504

Shame on you!

By Bjax - 11/10/2017 16:00

Today, my girlfriend woke me up at 5am to tell me she was mad at me. Apparently I did something bad in her dream. She still won't talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 734

You deserved it 395

TheTruth1428 0

Tuesday 20 October 2009 9:43

Is your name on the rent paperwork? If so, walk back in and tell that bitch to **** off. If your info isn't on the papers, she still has to give you an eviction notice. Also, you might want to check with the landlord there if neither of the above is the case. You might be able to get her kicked out for letting you stay there against her contract. FYL for having to deal with a horrible woman.

evangldbrg 0

Tuesday 20 October 2009 9:43

Ouch....I think a **** punt is in order.

Comments

perdix 29

Tuesday 20 October 2009 14:56

Your first scorned-lover stalker move: fail. Stalkers don't fall asleep -- they take massive quantities of meth which lets them stay up perpetually and gives them the clear-headed motivation to continue the hunt. You're lucky you are in a relatively non-violent country like Canada, because if you were here in Texas, she could have shot you and probably gotten away with it.

spellfire 0

Tuesday 20 October 2009 15:02

wow, aren't you a doormat.

moopsy234 0

Tuesday 20 October 2009 15:17

pimp-slap her ass wit sum baby powder!

DQB 0

Tuesday 20 October 2009 15:28

You must've seen The Last Kiss. Exact same thing happens except it has a much more romantic ending.

FromCFL 0

Tuesday 20 October 2009 15:46

YDI for not leaving when she obviously wanted some space.

Ellowise_fml 0

Tuesday 20 October 2009 16:33

You should have left.. Sorry, but she obviously wanted her space :( Life's a bitch...

blastvortex 3

Tuesday 20 October 2009 16:39

Um, if you're the lessee (or if you're joint-lessees), then what she did was criminal (and in which case, you should have her kicked off-grounds). Even if you aren't, she has absolutely no authority to kick you off property grounds other than her own apartment, which you were no longer in. Only the landlord has the authority to force you off the property grounds. On top of that, if she really was stomping you, that's called "physical assault" and is a criminal act. Now quit squatting, grow some stones, and dump her... oh, wait, she already did that to you. Tough luck, pal. File a report if you want to, but only if you didn't do anything to her other than yell at her and only if you don't have any sort of record that could be held against you. Good luck. You're gonna need it.

Veritas143 0

Wednesday 21 October 2009 2:35

I agree with everything you said..accept it's not just assault its also battery..but good comment! Yay for crazy bitches..funny how if it was a guy stomping some girls face there wouldnt be anyone saying "Well you should have left" . Ok well some might still say that haha

alexFYL 11

Wednesday 21 October 2009 21:34

you're right, they would be saying she's pathetic and needs to move on if she stayed... because it is pathetic, male or female. when someone wants you off their property, go! otherwise restraining orders and police get involved, on top of you looking pathetic.