Love, Health and Family: The family tree is a stump

The family tree is a stump

By Anonymous - 30/10/2018 12:00

Today, my family is too damn close. My uncle on my dad's side just got my aunt on my mum's side pregnant, three cousins from dad's side are dating three cousins from mum's side, and a half brother from my dad is marrying my half sister from my mum. We are the inbred rednecks of this town. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 527

You deserved it 362

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Same thing different taste

Deliverance

By Anonymous - 19/09/2019 20:00

Today, while at my family reunion, I learned my grandparents were first cousins. No wonder we're all crazy hillbillies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 593

You deserved it 162

It's actually illegal in the UK

By Anonymous - 10/08/2023 04:00

Today, I’ve suffered my whole life with a bunch of genetic conditions and I found out why at my dad's funeral. A bunch of relatives from America attended and one of them secretly told me my parents emigrated to England under a cloud of shame because they were brother and sister. I’m inbred. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 322

You deserved it 118

Keeping it in the family!

By Franklin - 01/02/2018 05:00 - United States - Fairbanks

Today, we got the results of our family's ancestry DNA tests. My father isn't related to me, but my grandfather is still my grandfather. Apparently grandma cheated on grandpa to get 'dad', and my mother cheated on 'dad' with my 'uncle' to get me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 274

You deserved it 304

No, not them!

By Anonymous - 16/01/2021 12:01 - Canada - Charlottetown

Today, after there was only one family that hated me enough to beat me up when we were kids, and we still don't get along as adults, my youngest brother is now dating into that family, and one of my older brothers is dating into that family too. It's like some kinda sick curse, or karma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 837

You deserved it 139

That's so sick!

By Anonymous - 01/05/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, I found out my wife of 5 years, with whom we have three kids, is actually my cousin. At a family dinner someone had pointed out how much she looks like my uncle. We laughed until she mentioned that she was adopted from the same town my uncle's ex-wife had a baby. A few questions and a blood test later, we all learned the sick truth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 661

You deserved it 98

By Oriianna Raiinbow - 23/10/2010 06:07 - United States

Today, talking to my boyfriend about each others families, we noticed we both had an aunt with the same name. After a while of trying to figure things out, we decide to call her. Turns out that we are long distance cousins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 807

You deserved it 4 575

By jellybean_94 - 15/08/2009 04:33 - Canada

Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 137 435

You deserved it 7 376

Perish the thought

By weird - 03/07/2021 20:01

Today, I found out that my half-brother from my mom’s side is dating my half-sister from my dad’s side when I caught them hooking up at our last family event. Even though they aren’t blood related, it’s still super creepy for some reason. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 036

You deserved it 260

Scared straight

By Anonymous - 29/05/2019 00:08

Today, I find myself in an unfortunate situation. I met my girlfriend's family and it turns out she's the baby of the family with 7 older brothers, a dad and a granddad, and 6 uncles. That’s 15 very large, very overprotective men I’m sure all want me dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 397

You deserved it 377

By charlieg9 - 30/08/2013 12:33 - United States - East Meadow

Today, I found out that I'm the creepy uncle of the family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 275

You deserved it 15 865

BurnInDemonFire 34

Friday 12 October 2018 16:24

All of those people are only related by your parents' marriage, so it's technically legal, even if it does feel gross. Or do you just feel left out of the pseudo-incest lovin'?

wmayrhofer 18

Tuesday 30 October 2018 12:42

it's not inbreeding but it sure sounds like you live in the sticks

Comments

FireCharge 0

Tuesday 30 October 2018 17:08

The Lannisters send their regards.

vixiecat 8

Tuesday 30 October 2018 19:07

I guess that’s what happens when your family makes up half of the town’s population.

mehimhere 11

Tuesday 30 October 2018 20:46

no offence OP, but sounds like your family tree is a tumbleweed.

Emma Marshall 19

Tuesday 30 October 2018 22:42

I would leave

Alaina Heuerman 20

Wednesday 31 October 2018 0:59

I-I wanna see this dudes family tree.

BlueSteele220 31

Wednesday 31 October 2018 1:26

Incest is the best! Why roam when you can get it at home?

Sofia94_fml 15

Wednesday 31 October 2018 3:53

This is in no way inbred. All of the couples are not even related to each other, they are just related to you. Even if they're closely related enough to each other to gather at a very close mutual relatives family for the vacations and breakups might cause awkwardness amongst family, the couples are from different families, except you and if you have any full siblings are probably the only ones they have in common biologically (or legally in case adoption plays a role) related to all of them if I'm not mistaken. Maybe that's why you feel left out, or probably smushed in the middle all together. sorry OP. The brother and sister might hit close but they still have different parents.