Cars, Accident and Transportation: The Thin White Duke

The Thin White Duke

By DJ Clitter - 16/04/2012 19:35 - United States

Today, I was in the car with my daughter when I narrowly missed hitting a car after running a stop sign. After she screamed at me and demanded to know what I was doing, I had to admit that I'd been daydreaming about David Bowie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 103

You deserved it 33 572

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Same thing different taste

By Mommy - 26/06/2011 20:47 - United States

Today, I was driving when a guy in a truck swerved in front of me. I didn't realize I'd sworn until I'd come to a red light and my one year old daughter yelled her own version of what I said. She now yells "Chicken in the hole!" whenever the car comes to a stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 473

You deserved it 28 195

By driver26 - 14/12/2010 05:15 - Canada

Today, I was arguing in the car with my boyfriend about who was the better driver. Being so incensed by the fact that he thought he was better made me completely zone out, and run a red light. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 361

You deserved it 41 273

By prettyinpurple - 10/02/2009 04:54 - United States

Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 943

You deserved it 56 308

By Anonymous - 01/02/2012 01:11 - United States

Today, while driving to work in heavy traffic, I got so into the song I was listening to that I tapped my foot on the gas to the beat. I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 728

You deserved it 48 513

By moxy - 24/01/2011 15:00

Today, I got into a car accident. Why? I was distracted by a floating spec of dust and was pretending I was in space. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 659

You deserved it 65 793

Kids these days, eh?

By child - 10/12/2015 02:24 - United States - Avon

Today, my mom was driving with my brothers and sister in the back seat. She was turned around talking to us, when my sister told my mom that she missed the light. She ran it, then screamed at us about not paying attention and noticing your surroundings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 451

You deserved it 1 560

What are the odds?

By Anonymous - 25/11/2020 03:00 - Australia - Warners Bay

Today, while driving my car, there was a talk on the radio about road safety. I got so engrossed that I drifted and crashed my car into a sign promoting the talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 252

You deserved it 931

By John - 22/08/2009 05:05 - United States

Today, I took my 15 year old daughter driving. I yelled at her for not going safely around corners. On the way home, while demonstrating how to drive right, I went around a corner and hit a cement truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 370

You deserved it 57 963

By Crashed - 01/01/2014 18:21 - United States - Evans

Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. My wife got pissed when I didn't immediately check on her, but rather the other driver. That other driver was my daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 475

You deserved it 5 345

By Anonymous - 17/02/2014 17:43 - United States - Freeport

Today, I was singing while driving through the car park. I blacked out trying to hit a high note, and ended up bashing into another car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 639

You deserved it 44 421

BigBoyBounce 5

Tuesday 17 April 2012 2:50

Not only did you almost endanger your daughter, you almost endangered other drivers. People like you don't deserve to have your license.

Mademoiselle_fml 34

Tuesday 17 April 2012 2:57

I don't blame you. David Bowie's one sexy beast ;)

Comments

RiceChrispy03 9

Tuesday 17 April 2012 17:09

How about you watch the damn road and pay the fk attention.

alfred07 18

Tuesday 17 April 2012 17:38

Ydi. Keep your attention on the road and dream about David Bowie when doing so won't endanger the lives and well being of those around you.

joanniejore 7

Tuesday 17 April 2012 17:50

Have you watched Labyrinth? David Bowie definitely has the goods.

fanaticdragon 10

Tuesday 17 April 2012 18:13

OP, was it a moonage daydream?

PrettyKookieToo 8

Tuesday 3 July 2012 2:55

I can't believe it took so long till someone made this joke!

kstheman 0

Tuesday 17 April 2012 18:18

David Bowie's awesome! At least ya didn't die

wironandine 8

Tuesday 17 April 2012 19:32

Moron.

dogpup4 23

Tuesday 17 April 2012 20:14

Guess you're just an Absolute Beginner at driving. AAAAAAAAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

saidawhiting 14

Tuesday 17 April 2012 23:31

'S okay OP, I daydream about Jareth the Goblin King all the time.

slyace 9

Tuesday 17 April 2012 23:44

Wait what now?!?

ilovedinosawers 17

Wednesday 18 April 2012 0:01

Lol and it's a guy daydreaming about him! Hahahah

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Annoying Am I overreacting? Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 537

You deserved it 10 056

Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 666

You deserved it 3 982

The Top

Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 710

You deserved it 36 527

Today, I typed an essay on my friend's computer, so she forwarded it to me in a email and she made the subject "here bitch" as a joke. I then went to email the essay to my teacher. I forwarded it thinking nothing of it only to realize that I didn't change the subject name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 078

You deserved it 56 552

Today, I gave blood. He sneezed while he stuck the needle in my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 020

You deserved it 2 881

Today, my boyfriend had a bad dream that a horse was biting his fingers off. He punched the horse in the neck, and in real life punched me in the spine. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 305

You deserved it 4 083

Today, I was accused of shooting up drugs at work. I was only feeding a baby bird that was tucked into my arm using a medicine syringe. I've been smuggling it to work because it has to eat every 2 hours or it will starve. Now everyone there thinks I'm a hardcore dope fiend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 595

You deserved it 8 797

Today, to get back at me for breaking up with him, my ex-boyfriend thought it would be really funny to post semi nude pictures of me on Craigslist. To top it off, he decided to give all 200+ people who responded to my ad my home phone number. I'm getting non-stop calls from horny freaks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 775

You deserved it 20 552

The Thin White Duke

Same thing different taste

Kids these days, eh?

What are the odds?

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