Kids: Today, a close friend came over with her three-year-old son....

By wellfuckyoutoo - 24/11/2015 17:45 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, a close friend came over with her three-year-old son. The child used a crayon on the walls, flushed my money down the toilet, and threw up. My friend was seriously offended when I asked her to help me clean everything up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 749

You deserved it 1 768

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/09/2011 19:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to clean up after the kid that discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 245

You deserved it 3 186

By ohshit - 29/03/2011 00:31 - Canada

Today, I was painting my bedroom walls, when I was struck with an uncontrollable bout of diarrhea. I had to watch helplessly from the en-suite bathroom as my 2 year old daughter painted a lovely picture for me, all over my new $500 sofa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 316

You deserved it 8 364

By Nickel - 01/06/2017 04:00

Today, my mom's friend came over. She brought her son and claimed that we could have bonding time. I ended up chasing the five-year-old around the house for an hour. After they'd left, my mom saw that the little kid had broken a lamp and a clock. She then said I had to pay for it using my money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 937

You deserved it 266

By drewcaver - 12/04/2015 19:49 - United States - Houston

Today, a little girl from my Sunday School class approached me and told me she had a stomach ache. She seemed very upset and her face was discolored so I took her to the nurse. While we were walking out the door, I looked down and saw a half-eaten crayon on the floor. That'll do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 673

You deserved it 2 324

Shidding and farding

By Anonymous - 07/09/2021 08:01

Today, I was babysitting my friend's two year-old daughter. Within 15 minutes, she had crawled out of her crib, taken off her diaper, and smooshed her poop in between the cracks in the floor. I put her in the tub, left to get a towel, and came back to her pooping in the tub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 290

Child's play

By Misbah Akhtar - 21/11/2020 12:59 - United Kingdom - Plymouth

Today, my 6 year-old brought me a card. On it was a turd belonging to my 4 year-old son. She got excited and grossed out, and threw it on the rug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 693

You deserved it 377

By Anonymous - 29/06/2014 04:16 - United States

Today, I had to go pick up my kid, because he threw up while playing at his friend's house. The boy's mother bitched me out for not keeping my son at home while he was "ill". Her breath was unspeakably foul. So foul that it caused me to throw up too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 702

You deserved it 4 019

Primitive art

By Anonymous - 19/04/2021 00:30

Today, I went to check on my 2 year-old daughter in her playroom, since she was being awfully quiet. I walk in to see her finger painting with her own feces on her kiddie table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 915

You deserved it 300

By failedfather - 16/12/2013 16:34 - Australia - Ferntree Gully

Today, I had to tell McDonald's that my 11-year-old son thought it would be funny to take a dump in the urinal. I then had to clean it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 275

You deserved it 13 822

By Andy - 16/12/2009 20:43 - United States

Today, a mother and son were in my office. The kid wasn't feeling well and threw up. Mom covered his mouth with her hand, creating a vomit nozzle and covering me in puke. She yelled that I deserved to be sprayed on because I was not quick enough in getting a bucket for her son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 391

You deserved it 2 752

SalsaVerdeDonut 22

Wednesday 25 November 2015 1:18

A real friend would have offered to clean it up before you even asked.

amberstar87 13

Wednesday 25 November 2015 1:17

I don't think I would invite her to my house again if that is how she is going to act.

Comments

shanny892 5

Wednesday 25 November 2015 2:31

I would have told her "your paying me back for the money your kid flushed and the paint it will cost to fix my walls"

pikagirlz2014 13

Wednesday 25 November 2015 3:17

Your friend needs to get her feral child in order or be prepared to clean up after it

Calingaladha 21

Wednesday 25 November 2015 3:31

Do the same in her house.

alfalfalaffa 17

Wednesday 25 November 2015 4:07

Life. Some people just don't get it.

Kwphunter 15

Wednesday 25 November 2015 4:11

Offended to clean up? I think I'd ask her to pay up first.

Witchylady 17

Wednesday 25 November 2015 4:19

Your friend should have cleaned everything up herself. And apologised for the throw up mess

MsFit 17

Wednesday 25 November 2015 6:51

She should have apologized for all of it

TheSulkingDead 14

Wednesday 25 November 2015 4:32

"Friend"

neuronerd 28

Wednesday 25 November 2015 4:47

That's either the fastest 3 yr old on the planet, or else their parent wasn't watching them closely enough. My nieces are 1 and 3, and my sister wouldn't let them out of her sight long enough to cause that damage (other than throwing up. Kids are just puke machines).