Miscellaneous: Today, a man wearing a Santa hat stumbled out of a bar, staggered... - FML

By Anonymous - 20/12/2013 22:00 - United Kingdom - Romford

Today, a man wearing a Santa hat stumbled out of a bar, staggered over to my car, and vomited through the open window into my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 847

You deserved it 4 230

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Same thing different taste

By dee - 10/12/2011 10:14 - United States

Today, I wound up cleaning vomit out of the window track of my car at midnight, in the nicest dress I own, after my husband got completely wasted at his office Christmas party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 804

You deserved it 3 323

By Anonymous - 16/07/2009 01:53 - United States

Today, my friend got drunk. He always pukes when he gets drunk, but I decided to drive him home anyway. He didn't puke the whole ride. We arrived at his house and he got out. Right as I was about to drive away he stumbled back to my car because he forgot his wallet. He grabbed it and puked on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 429

You deserved it 6 092

By Username - 02/08/2011 07:55 - United States

Today, it was a warm day out so I left my car windows slightly open while I was at work. One of the local bums apparently thought this was a perfect opportunity to use my open driver's side window as a barf receptacle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 325

You deserved it 9 684

By Jehovah God - 07/03/2014 18:51 - United States - Richmond

Today, while I was waiting at a red light, a drunk guy limped in front of my car, unzipped, and started pissing on my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 383

You deserved it 3 614

By sma93 - 17/12/2016 18:30 - United States - Baldwin

Today, after my work's Christmas party, everyone got so drunk that I had to help one of my only sober co-workers take everyone home and clean up vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 722

You deserved it 589

Giga barf

By Anonymous - 03/07/2022 06:00

Today, some woman, sick with god knows what, didn’t vomit into the bin next to my car, or even just onto the floor, she lurched over to my car and vomited through my open window onto my shirt and legs, and down into the footwell. I can still smell it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 159

You deserved it 99

Barf

By epicfailureismyl - 05/04/2018 15:00

Today, whilst driving, I had the sudden urge to vomit. As I pulled over I wound my window down, stuck my head out, and emptied my stomach. At least I would have if I had wound down the driver's window instead of the back window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 545

You deserved it 947

Oh what a night

By EmployeeOfTheMonth - 09/06/2013 23:33 - United States - Montpelier

Today, I attempted to make a good impression amongst new coworkers by volunteering to be the designated driver at my work party. What did that get me? A backseat full of puke and some idiot too drunk to remember where he lived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 468

You deserved it 9 138

By evil Santa - 25/12/2014 03:48 - United States - Solon

Today, I was mugged by a guy in a Santa suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 150

You deserved it 3 215

By moopymoplady - 29/11/2011 00:44 - Canada

Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 281

You deserved it 5 630

Next

Top comments

DocBastard 38

Saturday 21 December 2013 5:22

"Ho ho hooouurrgh!"

the_zero_article 15

Saturday 21 December 2013 5:20

Sounds like someone had a few too many Christmas spirits...

Comments

JMichael 25

Saturday 21 December 2013 10:11

Merry Christmas!

jewann123 10

Saturday 21 December 2013 11:00

Time for a kick in the balls

Ms_ValS 27

Saturday 21 December 2013 11:03

This is bloody hilarious. His logical thinking to look for a window to puke out of only went halfway there. There was another FML from the drunkard's POV years ago. Going into my favourites.

sam1507 6

Saturday 21 December 2013 11:23

That sucks! Merry Christmas!!

ceenguyenx 6

Saturday 21 December 2013 11:23

Even those that's messed up... at least he vomited on your lap not on some kid!

itzjstnx 18

Saturday 21 December 2013 12:35

Merry Christmas!!

vikky538 28

Saturday 21 December 2013 15:40

you never know what gift you might get from Santa....

xGetch 3

Saturday 21 December 2013 16:40

He must've had too much eggnog

martin8337 35

Saturday 21 December 2013 17:16

Bad Santa?

lightanddark 17

Saturday 21 December 2013 17:38

but my question is: why is your car window open? I thought that if you see a drunk guy stumble towards your car, the first thing you do is to close all your windows, not to leave them open, to make sure they don't do anything crazy to the inside of your car. And don't tell me they drive a convertible. no one drives a convertible during the winter

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The Top

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You deserved it 359

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 256

You deserved it 140

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I agree, your life sucks 62 413

You deserved it 26 015

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I agree, your life sucks 38 334

You deserved it 15 686

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I agree, your life sucks 32 070

You deserved it 6 378

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I agree, your life sucks 32 678

You deserved it 2 675

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I agree, your life sucks 6 490

You deserved it 13 297