By joco4 - 15/01/2016 18:00 - United States - Mobile
I agree, your life sucks
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joco4 tells us more.
joco4
27
OP here. First of all, thanks everyone for commenting and everything, a lot of your comments were very helpful! Some clarification, we have talked about it before, and yes, I have met her parents as well as a lot of her family. Also, she has met my parents and family, and they know that we are together. The reason she has not told them has nothing to do with religion or because she is embarrassed by me. When we first started dating, she asked her parents what they would think if we started dating, and they effectively said "it would disgrace their family," so she just told them that we would not date, and since then, it seems that the topic hasn't come up with them again. The reason this whole topic came up is because, when her parents would call her, they would always talk about one of her exes, and how he was doing, (basically hinting that they wanted that relationship to happen again). After that happened a few times, I asked her about it, and she informed me that they actually didn't know about us being together. Her parents always comment on how nice I am, and how I am a good person. The problem with her parents is that they live in the past. Even though it is currently 2016, her parents can't accept a relationship where I happen to be black, and she happens to be white. As far as her parents are concerned, I am just her friend that happens to hang out with her a lot, as for everyone else, we are very happily in a relationship. Her parents and some of her family are the only people who are out of the loop. So, at this point, we are just not worrying about them and they will find out on a later date. I would like them to know eventually, but it just seems like that wont happen anytime soon. Feel free to leave comments if you want to know anything else!
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Comments
Mathalamus
24
maybe she just doesnt want her parents to know, because it isn't their business to know.
If I pump a kid out my vag after lugging it around for nine plus months, I'd like to know who it likes hanging out with nowadays. I think that's well within the bounds of "parents business to know".
Mathalamus
24
unfortunately, not according to me. it would infringe on the individual's rights. if they dont wanna tell their parents, then they wont tell their parents. end of story. i would expect the same from my kids. if they dont want to tell me, then they dont want to.
Well don't be surprised if your daughter comes home with a 45 year old taxi driver named Oscar
Sathane
21
How does that even happen?
The only way I could see this happening is if you live far away from her parents. Even then hasn't she visited them and you were never invited along? Hope things work out for you.
you two need to talk.
Not everyone shares these things with their parents. They could be really strict or against her dating.
How on earth over the course of 5 years do you forget to tell your parents about your SO? Sorry she didn't tell them OP but I guess better late than never.
Oops, I forgot to turn off the stove and blow out the candle
What amazes me is that OP never tried to meet her parents in the 5 years they've been together? Without jumping to any bad conclusions, maybe she just doesn't have a good relationship with her parents, and tell them about her life is more complicated than OP thinks. Plenty of explanations, they just need to have an honest conversation
well why did it take you 5 years to find out? why weren't you trying to meet them before it ended up that far along in the relationship? doesn't sound like you care that much anyways. but still, I'm sorry. you are an important person. but maybe just not as important to your lady as you should be? don't let all if these people get to you and make you think you're unimportant or something. the best solution is to talk to your lady. find out the truth. explain to her how it makes you feel. sounds a bit corny but a true relationship is hard if you lack communication. but all these people talking about "there's no way she forgot" I've forgotten lol. I don't have a close relationship with my dad and I avoid speaking to my mom. so to me it's not really their business. it's not like they ask about my life anyways where it'd come up. soo..I know it's a kind of rarer situation but we can't all just assume that her forgetting is completely outlandish
Five years really? That's ridiculous to that long.
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That's weird. I wonder how it took you 5 years to find out tho.
As a rule, if either person is embarrassed to show off the other, it's not a healthy relationship. Sorry you found out that way OP.