Animals: Today, after I spent nearly three hours building an igloo, my...

By A - 09/02/2012 06:37 - United States

Today, after I spent nearly three hours building an igloo, my dog decided it would be a nice to enter it and take a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 690

You deserved it 4 147

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Same thing different taste

By dirtyfoot - 18/01/2009 21:50 - United States

Today, I stepped in dog shit, barefoot, in my own bathroom. The dog had been outside for two hours earlier, and I'd watched him take a dump. Apparently he was saving some for when he got back in the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 106

You deserved it 2 445

Slippin' and a slidin'

By Imnotfromhere - 05/03/2022 04:00

Today, my dog decided to take a poop at the top of an icy hill. Being a good citizen, I went to clean it up. Guess who slipped and wore the poop all the way down the hill… FML

I agree, your life sucks 906

You deserved it 136

By Anonymous - 08/12/2011 04:27 - Canada

Today, my dog took a dump beside the air intake for our furnace. The house now smells like dog crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 975

You deserved it 4 074

By hoo flung pu - 03/10/2013 08:26 - United States

Today, my dog figured out she can wipe her butthole on my walls after having squeezed out a turd or two. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 259

You deserved it 3 717

By morphea - 29/04/2015 22:54 - France - Chantepie

Today, coming home, I discovered that my dog had left me a beautiful mound of poop in the middle of the corridor. He'd made an effort, though: there was a roll of shredded toilet paper next to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 774

You deserved it 2 674

Self-defeating move

By Steve - 12/05/2021 11:01

Today, my dog discovered his new toilet by taking a dump on his own bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 728

You deserved it 104

By holyshitsnacks - 18/03/2014 22:53 - Canada - Woodstock

Today, the snow in my backyard melted, revealing just how much dog shit accumulated underneath it this winter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 490

You deserved it 7 851

Bad boy

By Really - 14/05/2023 08:00 - United States

Today, my roommate let his dog out. Not even five minutes later, she walked into my room and dropped a deuce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 724

You deserved it 88

By hadtocleanthemess - 28/06/2011 12:35 - Canada

Today, my dog got his head stuck in a container, panicked, and shat himself all over the living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 885

You deserved it 4 202

Nature calls

By Anonymous - 29/11/2023 00:00

Today, I got to my log cabin after an hour's hiking. I lit the fire because it was freezing and my stupid dog sniffed the fire, looked me in the eye, then jumped right into the fire and knocked the logs everywhere. My cabin is now ashes and I had an hour's hike back to my car with my stupid dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 568

You deserved it 184

sorandomgirl 0

Thursday 9 February 2012 12:01

Ouch! That's cold -_-

Buttsexpirate 9

Thursday 9 February 2012 12:01

I bet he was holding it in just for that moment.

Comments

scpieper 0

Thursday 9 February 2012 15:28

#eskimoproblems

rubberduckie94 13

Thursday 9 February 2012 15:30

I love dogs.

Incogneterpeter 1

Thursday 9 February 2012 15:30

Haha I like 27 s idea and way to try to pick number 1 up

iMagzzzy 0

Thursday 9 February 2012 15:33

At first I though it said 3 years, well I could be worse.

TourettesGuyFTW 25

Thursday 9 February 2012 15:36

icy how that would have pissed you off.

iVelcro 2

Thursday 9 February 2012 15:46

Trying to keep the poop cool, duh :p

AxJxA 14

Thursday 9 February 2012 15:46

Your dog was just giving you a house warming gift. You should be thankful & go get him a dog treat.

drinkPINK 4

Thursday 9 February 2012 15:47

Oh my god. I legit thought this said her dad took a poop in her igloo! I was like what the heck?! Hahahaha

lizard399 0

Thursday 9 February 2012 16:32

You shouldn't drink so much pink.

MischievousLoki 6

Thursday 9 February 2012 15:49

Why are you building an igloo? You don't live in Canada you live in United States. Lol

Skellig 2

Thursday 9 February 2012 15:55

If I had to shit outside I'd have found somewhere nice and out of the wind, too.

lizard399 0

Thursday 9 February 2012 16:35

Hey me too! -highfive-

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The Top

Today, I annoyed my friend by texting him "Meow" over and over at random times of the day because when he's drunk he meows in his sleep. Apparently a great way to get back at me was to tell my parents I wasn't a virgin, and that I got high on Wednesday. He had pictures to prove it for both. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 634

You deserved it 68 713

Today, I put lemon juice in my hair as a cheap and easy way to get highlights. I left it in my hair and I laid out in the backyard to get some sun. The sunshine wasn't the only thing that found me; it seems every bug in the neighborhood is now hiding in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 540

You deserved it 51 165

The Top

Today, my health insurance refuses to pay for either contraceptives or the small surgery to get my tubes tied, even with a doctor’s note confirming I need it. They are quite happy, however, to pay for any number of abortions, subsequent therapy, and/or complications during childbirth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 544

You deserved it 93

Today, while at work, I went to unlock the washroom for a customer. Normally we don't allow customers to use the staff washrooms, so I was as surprised as the guy I found sitting on the toilet when I opened the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 232

You deserved it 4 158

Today, I accidentally sharted during sex with a guy I’ve been seeing. I was seriously embarrassed, but he was excited about “new territory we can explore together.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 315

You deserved it 254

Today, I went to my high school reunion. I was super excited to see what everyone had done in their lives. The nerdy guy I bullied is now a U.S. Marine and already has two deployments in Afghanistan under his belt. He looked at me in his dress blues and said, "I remember you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 252

You deserved it 135 189

Today, after having saved up my money for months to buy my college-bound son the car of his dreams, I got a phone call telling me it had been totalled during a drag-race. I only gave him the keys two days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 265

You deserved it 14 127

Today, my pinky finger found out how much a king size bed weighs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 933

You deserved it 2 896