Animals: Today, as I was washing the dishes, I felt what I thought was...

By Anonymousagb - 24/04/2009 15:18 - United Arab Emirates

Today, as I was washing the dishes, I felt what I thought was a mosquito on my leg. I kicked at it with my foot only to realize that I had just kicked my adopted puppy in the face. Now, whenever I come into a room, he runs to the corner and pees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 964

You deserved it 92 171

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Same thing different taste

By nackpattywhackgiveadogabone - 23/09/2010 11:01 - United States

Today, after I got off work, as I walked into the house, I noticed something running across the floor towards me and out of complete terror I kicked it halfway across my living room, not knowing what it was. Turns out it was my roommate's new puppy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 080

You deserved it 50 519

By Anonymous - 21/10/2014 15:49 - United States - Bedford

Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 822

You deserved it 7 808

By SHIT-BREATH - 05/06/2013 16:03 - United Kingdom - Chepstow

Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 498

You deserved it 15 110

By Andrea Trevor - 30/04/2018 01:30

Today, I woke up at 5 a.m. to my dog jumping off of my bed. No big deal. I rolled over to the other side of the bed to fall back asleep and my face landed right in a puddle of his pee. I tasted it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 135

You deserved it 630

It's Caturday, respect our feline leaders

By believekimber - 09/07/2022 16:00

Today, I was feeding my pets and playing with my puppy when I suddenly felt something behind me. My cat is on the arm of the couch steadily spanking my butt with his paw. I can't win! FML

I agree, your life sucks 607

You deserved it 270

By Username - 02/08/2011 17:35 - United States

Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 475

You deserved it 5 305

By Aaron - 26/08/2010 05:33 - United States

Today, I was watching a video about spiders. When I felt a tickle on my foot, I kicked hard in panic. It was one of our newborn kittens walking. I almost killed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 642

You deserved it 56 020

By Anonymous - 09/08/2018 20:30

Today, I couldn't sleep. I had to pee really badly but I'm terrified of the dark, so I closed my eyes all the way to the bathroom. On the way, I tripped over my dog and fell face-first into the door frame. He then humped me as my nose bled all over the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 690

You deserved it 3 371

Bad boy

By lukey101 - 27/03/2023 16:00

Today, my puppy celebrated a milestone by lifting his leg to pee for the first time. Too bad it was up against my brand new soft fabric couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 643

You deserved it 183

By AnHoneyMouse - 12/05/2017 02:00

Today, while I was cooking, my dogs were messing around behind me. I suddenly felt a painful bite on my ass cheek and instinctively kicked back. I then realized it was my 3-year-old daughter, who was laying on the floor crying with a nose bleed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 126

You deserved it 1 411

random__user 0

Friday 24 April 2009 20:06

You deserved it, you idiot. The puppy didn't though.

sexyx0sandyyy 0

Friday 24 April 2009 20:03

awww! poor puppy!!! how cute/sad!

Comments

crayons_fml 0

Saturday 25 April 2009 1:24

aww poor puppy!

babyblue1990 0

Saturday 25 April 2009 1:30

Poor puppy!

the_question_mar 0

Saturday 25 April 2009 1:37

wow **** you! i lvoe dogs! but **** me, too. Because i laughed.

BRBICECREAMTRUCK 0

Saturday 25 April 2009 1:40

LOL@ #17!!! such a dumbass, he knows nothing about mosquito's. "mosquitos use numbing agents so we can't feel them" actually, they use something called an anti-coagulant which is what makes the bite itch and it keeps the blood flowing so it doesnt clot and can be drunk easily. such a dumbass... go back to school kid

pumpkincakes 3

Saturday 25 April 2009 1:40

go upto him and take dog treats sit with him till hes comfortable with you again

hislovelylady 0

Saturday 25 April 2009 1:41

#9 LMFAO! Thanks, you just made my day!

tami1215 0

Saturday 25 April 2009 1:45

You are a horrible person to think that this post would incite laughter. That poor puppy who is completely dependant on you for food, shelter, and protection is now so terrified that it can't control its bladder. You don't deserve that dog and you should be ashamed of yourself.

leavesofgrass 0

Saturday 25 April 2009 1:52

This would be why you look down to see what's on your leg. Jerk.

nina_fml 0

Saturday 25 April 2009 1:57

#17, Mosquitos use a numbing agent when they actually suck blood from you. They do not have the ability to instantly "numb" your skin the second they land on it. When they land on sensitive skin, you feel a little tickle from their legs.