By helpme - 15/01/2013 07:23 - United States - Irvine

Today, as part of a charity project called Operation Valentine, I worked with 150 other volunteers to make care packages and Valentine's Day cards to send to the troops in Afghanistan, thanking them for their courage. My boyfriend called the cards "cheating" and now refuses to see me. FML
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Top comments

BlackBlazeCobra 16

Did you explain to him what they were though? If he still thinks that, then your boyfriend's a moron.

182 7

Comments

Jenn50 19

You want to be very careful about a guy who manufactures absurd reasons to be mad at you. This type of behaviour is very common in abusers. Early in the relationship, they accuse you of some wrongdoing, and then withdraw, forcing you to pursue forgiveness and thus be in their debt. Over time, they repeat the pattern, training their partner to believe they are bad people who are lucky to have someone, which gives the abuser an imbalance of control, and teaches the partner that they need to put up with whatever garbage is thrown at them to avoid upsetting "the only person who would put up with you." Jealousy, possessiveness and controlling behaviour are HUGE red flags. Do yourself a favour and see this manipulation for what it is.

20 0
Enslaved 36

Also isolating her from others. If the OP's boyfriend feels this is "cheating", what if she -Ex: has a casual friendship with a male co-worker or has a female friend that has a single brother etc... *I'm glad to see a comment that looks beyond and analysis this pattern of behaviour that many miss because they don't realize what to look for-- until it's too late. (:

8 0
DanielleinDC 33

Excellent points #53 and #61. Nobody is saying he is an abuser, but this fits the pattern of manipulative behavior at best and abusive behavior at worst. I stand by my suggestion to dump a guy who thinks sending Valentines to soldiers overseas is cheating.

4 0
SuperDanielNL 23

He seems insecure and jealous, talk to him about it.

1 0
superdom 12

Wtf he's a ducking idiot

0 5
charvisioku 22

Ducking? Why, did OP throw shit at him for being such an idiot or something?

2 2
RedPillSucks 31

He should go **** a duck.

1 3
WelcomeToAndale 13

Seems like your boyfriend is a tiny bit insecure...

1 1
Vidrill 22

Your boyfriend has probably missunderstood what you are doing... Maybe make another effort to clarify to the poor idiot? I will certainly get thumbed down into oblivion for this, but might as well try to get an answer, how can you justify the presense of your soldiers in Afghanistan as "fighting for your freedom"?. I saw it in a couple of comments.... It's not the soldiers' fault, obviously, but if I were an American I would want those poor people to come home....

6 1
RedPillSucks 31

Irrespective of why they're there, the soldiers are doing their duty to their country and deserve to be respected and honored. Any other emotion should be directed at the politicians that sent them there.

6 1
Vidrill 22

I'm not blaming the soldiers of course, all I'm saying is that I don't think the public's position should be "The troops are fighting for our freedom in Afghanistan", how are they fighting for your freedom exactly? How is Afghanistan remotely related to the freedom of American people? If the public sentiment changes, so will your politics. Those people should not risk their lives on foreign territory for no reason....

4 2
Zebediabolical 39

Because if we don't fight them over there, we'll have to fight them over here! At least that's the only response I've ever gotten to pretty much that same question.

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Vidrill 22

Glad I'm not alone, I really don't mean to offend anyone, I just don't understand why people are not objecting to this war more... It's been going on long enough, hasn't produced any important results and the argument that they "will follow you home" is clearly ridiculous ( Bill Maher commented "What are they, Lassie?")and an attempt to manipulate people's fear.

3 1
EvilUndead 9

That's very simple. Soldiers in Afghanistan are NOT fighting for your freedom, because Afghanistan is not your immediate neighbor and does not share borders with you - the country is on another side of globe.

2 1
dabum18 5

He is an ass You are better off without him Thank the troops for me

0 1
graphicstyle7 17

No, he does not deserve another chance. DUMP HIM. Seriously.

1 0
skatoolaki 24

He sounds like a selfish prick with some issues. I'd seriously consider dumping him.

2 0
Phoenix3806 1

Then you deserve much better. I was in desert storm and lost 3 friends. I was single at the time, and one of the most important things i had was a letter from someone i never met, but it thanked me for what i was doing there, so far from home. It ment so much that it kept me alive

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skatoolaki 24

I'm sorry for the losses and pain you endured, but thank you for your service.

5 0