Intimacy: Today, at work, I slipped and fell on my backside. The creepy...

By only 10 more hours to go - 06/01/2012 11:40 - United States

Today, at work, I slipped and fell on my backside. The creepy security guard offered to 'kiss it better.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 299

You deserved it 3 382

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

By ForeverAlone - 15/10/2014 00:13 - United States - Watertown

Today, before work, I was quickly cleaning when I tripped and the side of my neck hit the countertop, causing a dark bruise. During work, people wouldn't stop giving me high fives for getting laid and I was too embarrassed to tell them truth that I'm not desirable, just clumsy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 430

You deserved it 3 769

By embarrassed - 20/12/2010 14:51 - United States

Today, I slipped at work while putting out a "wet floor" sign to make sure the customers didn't slip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 048

You deserved it 6 565

By no name - 22/06/2013 07:20 - United States - Gaylord

Today, while working at my job at a nursing home, I slipped and fell. It wouldn't be so bad if it was just water. No, one of the residents had just had an "accident". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 761

You deserved it 3 835

Uncomfortable

By bad timing - 03/09/2019 15:01 - United States - Monterey Park

Today, at work, my manager accidentally bumped into me, brushing my behind with the back of his hand. He was a bit embarrassed, so I jokingly said, “You could at least buy me dinner first!” He went to HR and told them I made him uncomfortable. I was just trying to lighten the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 910

You deserved it 370

Thanks a bunch

By nose hurts - 30/12/2012 01:01 - United States - Richmond

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 644

You deserved it 3 494

Oops.

By Anonymous - 18/11/2017 01:30

Today, within 24 hours at my new security job, I accidentally tasered the head of security in the groin, causing him to piss himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 870

You deserved it 1 115

By Anonymous - 04/04/2015 14:35 - France - Melesse

Today, at work, I tripped and fell face-first into a food display. As I picked myself up, totally humiliated, I tripped again and fell right back into it, earning a bunch of pitying looks from nearby customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 642

You deserved it 3 814

By KN - 25/06/2009 14:13 - United States

Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 887

You deserved it 12 553

By Anonymous - 10/06/2010 19:26 - United States

Today, I walked into work to see my boss's hot son. I wanted him to notice me, so I did my "sexy walk". I then slipped and fell onto my desk, broke my desk, and sprained my wrist. Oh he noticed me alright. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 328

You deserved it 50 294

By shart - 09/03/2016 02:48 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I had an accident at work. Not the kind involving worker's compensation. The kind involving desperately scrubbing my office chair with paper towels, before going home to change my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 549

You deserved it 2 289

Torva_fml 16

Friday 6 January 2012 16:01

What a romantic! He sure knows how to get a lady...

cradle6 13

Friday 6 January 2012 16:04

What an asshole. You should have yelled, "KISS MY ASS!" Oh wait...

Comments

Ballin8864 4

Friday 6 January 2012 23:43

LOL. #70. ;D

GoW_Chick 14

Friday 6 January 2012 23:44

If he offers to take you to his 'special' place make sure you're polite and offer to bring the snacks.

MCharmed2012 3

Saturday 7 January 2012 1:15

Tell him that when you fell, it scared the crap out of you literally --- that should get rid of him. If it doesn't, stay far-far away from him. He's a nasty man. :p

jroxursox1 10

Saturday 7 January 2012 1:54

I'm healed!! It's a miracle!! *runs away*

JukeboxValkyrie 19

Saturday 7 January 2012 1:57

Offer to have someone kiss his shin better after you kick him.

VivaLaAris707 0

Saturday 7 January 2012 3:24

Dahell? Yeah that's creepy alright!

nfjskcbdkdjdjdn 2

Saturday 7 January 2012 3:27

Your accidental reply: Kiss my ass!

StalinsHeir 1

Saturday 7 January 2012 3:30

I would have offered to pound it better ;) (depending on how fine you are of course)

redhedsaysrawr 18

Saturday 7 January 2012 3:43

ROFL! reminds me of the time i went on an away trip with school, and during lunch i asked this older employee by the drinks table if the tea was sweet or unsweet, his reply was "yeah that tea is sweet... just like me..." in the creepiest voice you could imagine... needless to say i stayed far away from the guy for the rest of the trip lol.