Work: Today, being so desperate for money, I accepted a job in which...

By BOHICA123 - 08/10/2013 02:08 - United States - Brighton

Today, being so desperate for money, I accepted a job in which I get shot at with paintballs for 6 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 185

You deserved it 5 287

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Same thing different taste

Get off my lawn!

By Anonymous - 29/08/2020 14:09

Today, the police came to my house and arrested me. Why? The neighborhood kids thought it would be fun to hide behind my house and shoot at people with paintball guns. People saw it coming from my house and called the police. I was fired from work, due to missing it without notice. No excuses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 113

You deserved it 109

By walllflower - 08/02/2015 19:46 - Canada - Saint Catharines

Today, I went paintballing with my siblings. Once we were done, they realised I hadn't been shot at all. They cornered me in the forest and lit me up. I have welts all over my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 025

You deserved it 4 389

Risky

By Josh - 13/10/2023 16:00 - United States

Today, I thought it would be fun to join my friends for a game of paintball. I got shot in the same spot three times in a row. It turned out to be my own team, who mistook me for the enemy because I was wearing… camouflage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 204

By nl4 - 01/11/2013 23:55 - Israel - Tel Aviv

Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 903

You deserved it 56 260

By sore - 21/10/2009 08:27 - Australia

Today, I was paintballing when I got shot in the stomach and winded. As I was gasping for breath on the ground, someone came up and shot me point blank in my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 272

You deserved it 6 679

By no - 17/11/2014 02:26 - United States

Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood, so my dad told me to go wash it. While I was washing it, he shot me several times in the back, yelling, "That's payback for being born." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 640

You deserved it 4 002

By Anonymous - 24/01/2017 18:00

Today, I went paint-balling with my girlfriend. As we drove she was scared about getting shot a lot, especially in the head. I reassured her that with all the protective gear it was unlikely. First round, within a minute, she gets shot 3 times in the back of the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 928

You deserved it 834

By grant b - 09/06/2011 04:06 - United States

Today, my boss asked if he could pay me in guns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 405

You deserved it 6 092

By someone euthanize me - 16/01/2016 08:17

Today, I tested out my new paintball gun by firing a few rounds into some thick bushes. Nothing could've prepared me for the angry swarm of hornets whose nest I'd apparently shot. I'm in so much pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 880

You deserved it 8 044

By annoyedgirl - 04/05/2013 01:30 - United States - Ephrata

Today, I was forced to work with someone I absolutely hate. I then found myself starting to like him, until he shot me in the forehead with a stapler gun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 528

You deserved it 4 731

Micayla 12

Tuesday 8 October 2013 8:55

Hey, it'll be some type of experience to put down on your resume! Props to you though, I got hit with a paintball once and it hurt like hell!

purebliss_fml 19

Tuesday 8 October 2013 8:57

A job's a job! At least you're not a hooker, if that makes you feel any better...

Comments

KiddNYC1O 20

Tuesday 8 October 2013 22:43

At least you're not having oranges propelled at you at 150mph!

831curmudgeon 7

Tuesday 8 October 2013 23:10

Do you know if they're hiring shooters?

GetHardOrGoHome 7

Tuesday 8 October 2013 23:40

My sister was accidentally shot in the eye from a foot away...she almost had irreversible damage done.

kiakonno 8

Wednesday 9 October 2013 0:07

Time to get out the padding

rebel501 4

Wednesday 9 October 2013 0:51

Make it into a game and try and dodge them

NotsowiseSAGe 12

Wednesday 9 October 2013 0:52

Sounds like what I pay to when practicing with my team. I'm jealous that you get paid.

sihtkcuf 6

Wednesday 9 October 2013 2:56

I have a pretty much the same job :)

makitokito 14

Wednesday 9 October 2013 4:10

Wouldnt be zombie paintball would it?

hayhaybaybee 1

Wednesday 9 October 2013 4:18

haunted hollow?

acroluvr98 11

Wednesday 9 October 2013 4:21

Do you work at the Fearfest zombie paintball place?

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Stop everything you're doing right now, there's an (almost) naked lady in today's illustration! Plus, there's a puppet AND doctors. It's the perfect illustration, made by Gemma Correll, our British artist of the day. Check out her interview! ...

I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 9

Well. I must admit when I first received today's illustration, seeing the massive pliers pop out kind of freaked me out. Then I reached the last panel and I'm not sure if it's out of anxiety relief or what, but I laughed so hard I might have choked a...

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You deserved it 0

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Today, I was talking about phobias and anxiety disorders in psychology class. I nearly had a panic attack because I was worried that someone might realize I suffer from them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 053

You deserved it 4 056

Today, I went to urgent care for cloudy vision and eye pain to rule out an infection. They freaked out and pressured me into going to the ER, implying I could lose my vision. Several hours and thousands of dollars later, I just have dry eyes. I hate our healthcare system. FML

I agree, your life sucks 461

You deserved it 93

Today, my co-worker handed me the phone and said it was my boyfriend calling, so I answered "Hello, Love!" It was my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 341

You deserved it 3 459

Today, I had to hand write a 10 page essay for one of my classes. When I turned it in I got an automatic zero. It was written in blue. Not black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 874

You deserved it 13 053

Today, and ever since his parents died in a crash, my husband is so petrified of his own eventual death that he's determined not to waste any time, even on sleep, and now only allows himself one REM cycle of sleep per night, around 90 minutes. He’s falling apart and refuses to see a doctor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 76

Today, my dad decided to get his friend to help move our old sofas to save money. Its leg got stuck in the doorway, scratched the entire hallway wall, punched a big hole in it and the other leg made a big dent in our front door. We live in an apartment complex and now have to to pay for everything to be fixed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 247

You deserved it 6 250

Same thing different taste

Get off my lawn!

Risky

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