Miscellaneous: Today, during a silent breathing meditation at the Buddhist center,...

By Anonymous - 22/02/2013 07:57 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, during a silent breathing meditation at the Buddhist center, I accidentally let one rip which echoed through the meditation chamber. If that wasn't bad enough, the follow-up odor was enough to fell a charging rhinoceros. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 546

You deserved it 8 101

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Same thing different taste

Chilled

By Janet - 20/11/2023 18:30 - United States

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 134

By yogapants - 24/09/2010 20:21 - Switzerland

Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 250

You deserved it 14 868

Both ends

By Anon - 19/06/2024 12:00 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I was in a meeting when I felt a sneeze coming on. I tried to hold it in to avoid making a noise. Instead, I ended up sneeze-imploding so hard that I accidentally farted at the same time. The entire room went silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 444

You deserved it 133

By lambeaster - 20/01/2016 14:27 - United States - Washington

Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 825

You deserved it 3 714

By nightmare ass - 15/05/2019 06:11

Today, I let out the most vile, nose-melting dairy curdling fart of my life. The sound didn’t wake me up. But the nightmare I had from how rank smelling it was sure did. My own fart ruined my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 537

You deserved it 420

Smell you later

By Anonymous - 17/10/2009 19:48 - United States

Today, I had to go to the dentist to have a cavity filled. Around halfway through the procedure, something broke the silence in the room. It was my dentist, who had farted. I had to smell his rancid flatulence for around the next five minutes. All the while, I had to keep my mouth wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 784

You deserved it 2 702

Ight imma head out

By Anonymous - 10/10/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, I was nervously observing a delicate medical procedure while training at my new job. I tried to stifle a sneeze and instead (as you can probably guess) ripped the biggest, most cartoonishly loud fart of my life. My ass sounded like a tuba and I was asked to leave the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 412

You deserved it 138

By Sabre777 - 17/08/2019 22:00

Today, while as a therapist, a client made an audible fart and pointed out that she had done so. Shortly after, she wrinkled her nose as she savored the odor. She began to discuss her significant trauma issues. Before I could respond, her fart wafted over to me, making any mature response pointless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 594

You deserved it 162

Denial

By Loud - 08/09/2016 06:07 - Australia

Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 599

You deserved it 8 495

Stealth dog

By Anonymous - 02/06/2020 02:00

Today, while I was sitting in a waiting room to be seen, my service dog (who was tucked under the bench I was sitting) let out the most vile, silent but deadly fart. The person near me retched and heaved, and I got death glares while someone sprayed their old lady perfume to mask the smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 609

You deserved it 238

tannerianian 11

Friday 22 February 2013 16:56

Being Buddhist myself a big role in it is compassion/forgiveness etc. hopefully everyone there followed that. Otherwise FYL happens to everyone at some point el though OP don't worry(:

beannlove 7

Friday 22 February 2013 17:42

*accidentally let one rip* means OP was not expecting to fart, and it just slipper out on them by surprise..

Comments

GothickNihilist 15

Friday 22 February 2013 17:20

And chickpeas.

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 22 February 2013 17:23

Could have been worse. You could have been doing downward facing dog and blasted the person directly behind you (Yes, I know that's Yoga, not Buddhist meditation)

Quasar55_fml 18

Friday 22 February 2013 18:39

Is it me or all names of yoga positions sound like something sexual ?

GarageDragon 22

Friday 22 February 2013 17:24

I remember moderating this one. Laughed so much when I read it.

Connect 10

Friday 22 February 2013 17:28

Hehe you should write as a living OP.

GTAmax99 12

Friday 22 February 2013 17:28

It felt like I was there!

DanielleinDC 33

Friday 22 February 2013 17:31

Just what are you eating to cause such vile farts? Good gravy. But I just can't help laughing at this one.

asb818 14

Friday 22 February 2013 17:55

Somehow I don't think he was eating good gravy

DanielleinDC 33

Friday 22 February 2013 21:07

It's an expression, folks.

asb818 14

Monday 25 February 2013 17:56

Yeah, we know. You obviously don't understand sarcasm.

perdix 29

Friday 22 February 2013 17:31

I hope you continued with the diaphragmatic deep breathing. You deserve to have fart particles lingering in the depths of your lungs until you achieve Nirvana.