Intimacy: Today, feeling lonely after my recent breakup, I put on my nicest...

By chase - 25/01/2013 00:54 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, feeling lonely after my recent breakup, I put on my nicest clothes and went out clubbing with a few friends. I brought a guy back to my place, and we got intimate. It was going well, until he took off my push-up bra, then panicked and drunkenly asked, "Where'd they go?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 211

You deserved it 53 258

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Same thing different taste

By lehonj49 - 21/06/2013 16:10 - Australia - Burwood

Today, after years of battling my social anxiety issues, I went out clubbing with my friends. A girl started talking to me and we actually hit it off. The next thing I know, I'm on the floor getting wailed on by some bloke for hitting on his girlfriend. She didn't do a thing to stop him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 853

You deserved it 3 688

A friend in need…

By anonymous - 30/06/2012 06:26 - United States - Denver

Today, I was going through a hard and painful break up after a long relationship. Trying to get over it, I invited my two best friends over to lift my spirits. The night ended with them making out on my bed as I sat alone in the other room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 199

You deserved it 2 535

By ohai ur hawt, wanna fuzzzZzZZzzZzz - 04/04/2014 23:20 - Mexico - Mexico

Today, I met a really nice girl at a club, and we went back to my place. I was finally going to lose my virginity, but just as she started kissing me, I panicked and ended up fainting. When I came to, I was still clothed, and she was long gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 521

You deserved it 13 117

By Anonymous - 16/01/2010 16:44 - United States

Today, I lost my virginity to my amazing boyfriend. As we were getting dressed, I realized I had lost my bra. After intense searching I finally found it and put it on. It wasn't mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 809

You deserved it 4 239

Full support

By dumpedchick - 25/06/2009 02:46 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years dumped me. I was really depressed, so a couple of my friends came over to take me out to a club to cheer me up. My ex was there, partying with his friends. He came up to me and my friends, and asked my friend if she wanted to hang out sometime. She said yes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 434

You deserved it 3 655

By Anonymous - 06/08/2011 01:47 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. He was so nervous, he broke down in tears after failing to unclasp my bra after multiple fumbling attempts. Mood? Ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 755

You deserved it 5 994

By Anonymous - 07/12/2012 21:28 - United States

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 540

You deserved it 3 197

By ashlyn - 06/08/2011 05:41 - United States

Today, I went to pick up some of my clothes from my boyfriend's apartment. While searching under his bed he pulled out a tank top and bra and asked if they were mine. They weren't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 526

You deserved it 3 156

By Chelsea - 02/04/2012 17:31 - United States

Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 450

You deserved it 38 898

By Anonymous - 01/12/2012 00:31 - United States - Rocklin

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 189

You deserved it 21 640

jizzwold 21

Friday 25 January 2013 5:58

Because obviously the best way to feel better about your loneliness is casual sex.

MrHotShot22 6

Friday 25 January 2013 5:56

It's cause you deceived him with lies! Lies!

Comments

mandapanda394 10

Friday 25 January 2013 6:50

I never "false advertise" other than heels if i'm just wanting to get some. i have several heavily padded bras i wear because they make me feel better and i get treated better when i wear them.

paulpings 6

Friday 25 January 2013 6:52

Anyone else see that film "I'm gonna get you sucka" ? Where the woman starts removing all her fake things before sex? - ass, boobs, hair, teeth? Ahhhh junebug!

Enslaved 36

Friday 25 January 2013 7:16

Don't forget leg! (: Chris Rocks' first movie debut. That rib scene is still funny to this day!

watsinausername 13

Friday 25 January 2013 6:54

Keep going OP, tell us what happened next. Did Manchester United score?

doritowhore 9

Friday 25 January 2013 7:07

For one, going out and hooking up with some random guy right after a breakup is not a very bright idea. Secondly, I never really understood the point in sex with a complete stranger. How do you know they aren't psychotic? Or that there isn't some other problem? Call me paranoid, but just by reading FMLs we have plenty of examples.

taranpreet 7

Friday 25 January 2013 7:32

They say it's not the best idea but a lot of people do it. It can be a real self-esteem booster..except maybe not in OPs case

EvilUndead 9

Friday 25 January 2013 7:49

Having sex with a stranger might not be a bad thing (although there's risk of STD), but 1. Bringing stranger into your HOME. 2. and Bringing DRUNK stranger into your home. Definitely isn't a smart move. Those two things are security risks. Drunkenness means trouble, and revealing home location means trouble if your hookup is prone to stalking. So if you want to screw random people, it would make sense to do it somewhere else without revealing your home location.