Intimacy, Sex and Awkward: Today, I had to sleep at my in-laws' house. My in-laws' bedroom...

By UpAllNight - 09/02/2019 13:00 - Palestinian Territory

Today, I had to sleep at my in-laws' house. My in-laws' bedroom is directly above the one we’re sleeping in. For the last 20 minutes, all I can hear is the bed going, “Thud, thud, thud.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 088

You deserved it 299

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Same thing different taste

STOP!

By Anonymous - 28/09/2021 20:00

Today, for the second week in a row, I woke up to the sound of my awful upstairs neighbors having sex between the hours of 1 and 3 AM. Their bed is so noisy, and earplugs barely help. At this point, based on the rhythm of their bed squeaking, I can tell when they're about to finish, and I hate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 689

You deserved it 167

By Anonymous - 03/01/2009 16:48 - France

Today, I can hear my parents having sex in the next room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 691

You deserved it 4 395

Noise

By wide awake - 31/07/2020 14:01

Today, I'm spending the night at my family’s house. I have to share a room with my two kids and their mother. The three of them snore like warthogs in a zoo. Desperate for sleep, I went to go sleep on the couch. The dog sleeping on the rug snores like an old truck. I’m never going to get any sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 395

You deserved it 224

My kingdom for a lock

By IAmJacksDeflatedHappiness - 19/10/2021 23:00

Today, I asked my family not to disturb me while I slept, as I had hit over 72 hours of insomnia. My family must have heard me say, “Come in every 20 minutes and wake me up with whatever banal shit you can think of.” I gave up when my mother-in-law decided to enter my room and start vacuuming the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 430

You deserved it 113

Nooooooo!

By ScarredEars - 12/08/2010 12:02 - United States

Today, I heard my parents having sex. It wouldn't have been so bad if we weren't in the same hotel room. They thought I was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 388

You deserved it 3 801

By ineedsleep - 30/10/2014 14:15 - Finland - J?rvenp

Today, I found out that there's a very loud and frisky couple living above my bedroom, and a family with a crying baby living above my living room. At this rate, I'll end up sleeping in the bathtub in my own home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 705

You deserved it 2 753

By LostSleep - 24/05/2016 21:54 - United Kingdom

Today, I was woken at 4 a.m. by the sounds of someone crashing down the stairs. I scrambled out, still half-asleep, to find out that nobody was in an agonized heap at the bottom. The walls are so thin in my house that I could hear the neighbour falling down HIS stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 750

You deserved it 786

Hummmmmmmmm

By SleeplessInDenver - 02/09/2019 06:00 - United States - Denver

Today, I moved into my brand new apartment, only to discover that there is an annoying, constant hum coming from the ceiling above my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 583

You deserved it 145

Testimony night

By Anonymous - 15/11/2019 18:00

Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 959

You deserved it 514

By Anonymous - 07/11/2009 16:24 - United States

Today, I wanted to sleep in after a rough week, only to be woken up by my roommate's sex screams and the pounding of her bed against the wall. Earplugs did not help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 847

You deserved it 2 434

manb91uk 22

Saturday 9 February 2019 12:56

You're a guest in their house... Get over it

darkshadus 10

Saturday 9 February 2019 13:39

Just say ay breakfast "I hope my partner/SO/Wife/Husband can be that sexually active when we are your age" ..then cue awkward silence lol

Comments

manb91uk 22

Saturday 9 February 2019 12:56

You're a guest in their house... Get over it

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 9 February 2019 12:58

He’s under it.

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 9 February 2019 13:01

You’d better get some noise-cancelling headphones because old people can go for a long time. It’s one of the few benefits of getting older.

Aphrodite 20

Saturday 9 February 2019 16:25

LOL

darkshadus 10

Saturday 9 February 2019 13:39

Just say ay breakfast "I hope my partner/SO/Wife/Husband can be that sexually active when we are your age" ..then cue awkward silence lol

bloopaloop 27

Saturday 9 February 2019 15:32

I'm happy for them!

saberjpg 6

Saturday 9 February 2019 16:19

Seems like you're way too easily offended/ grossed out. People have sex. Accept it, and move on.

BurnInDemonFire 34

Saturday 9 February 2019 23:16

Plot twist: Your in-laws are downstairs watching TV.

1gullible_bugger 33

Sunday 10 February 2019 1:08

so at least you know your in-laws have a healthy sexual relationship. And you are a guest in their house.

K3719er 9

Wednesday 13 February 2019 4:27

Sounds to me like you missed a golden opportunity to rub one out 🤣

baristalbc 18

Thursday 14 February 2019 3:48

Doesn’t that bode well for YOUR future sex life, considering your spouse is their offspring?

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 538

You deserved it 10 056

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 777

You deserved it 3 940

The Top

Today, some official photographs went live on our company website. As I took a closer look, I realised I was in the background of one photo unloading boxes from a van. My trousers were halfway down my ass, flashing my butt crack for the whole internet to see. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 885

You deserved it 1 451

Today, my boyfriend of eight happy months suddenly broke up with me via text. He'd always insisted that texts were too impersonal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 576

You deserved it 137

Today, my wife announced she wants to incorporate a saddle into our lovemaking. This might be fine, except she wants me to wear an actual 30-pound saddle, and I have bad knees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 293

You deserved it 169

Today, I realised I'm like the Mary Poppins of dating. I keep meeting these broken men, I help them through their stuff, only for them to date someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 380

You deserved it 120

Today, I tried to comfort my daughter who'd been crying non-stop for hours. She thinks Chuck Norris is coming to kill her, and I can't convince her otherwise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 595

You deserved it 5 373

Today, I got braces fitted. For the next two years, I'll be the most handsome guy on earth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 655

You deserved it 24 489