Love: Today, for the first time ever, my boyfriend of one year told...

By Anonymous - 06/01/2011 17:38 - United States

Today, for the first time ever, my boyfriend of one year told me he loved me. He was calling me by collect call from the county jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 583

You deserved it 6 185

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Maddii1112 - 10/08/2016 19:28 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that he loved me for the first time in a way I'll never forget. In fact, his exact words were, "You're not the only one that I love." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 574

You deserved it 1 116

By anonymous - 29/12/2009 01:21 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me 80 times in 5 minutes. I had previously told him I was with my friends. He left me a voicemail proposing saying he loved me to death and he was crying. We've been dating for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 251

You deserved it 5 049

By Anonymous - 02/06/2009 11:05 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend of over a year finally told me he loved me. This revelation was quickly followed by "at least, I think this is how people feel when they say that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 614

You deserved it 5 385

By Beaten - 31/07/2010 23:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of one year broke up with me. He's been in jail for the last four months. I paid for his very expensive lawyer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 826

You deserved it 42 197

Bad boys bad boys

By addie - 03/03/2013 08:27 - United States

Today, my fiancé called me as I was clocking out. I thought he was going to tell me that he was waiting outside. Instead, he told me that he's getting arrested and needs me to call his mom for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 241

You deserved it 3 077

The nerve of some people

By Inga44 - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend. He was at the police station for breaking into a model home to hook up with the girl he's been cheating on me with for the past four months. I was his one phone call. He was expecting me to bail him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 120

You deserved it 3 775

It's the thought that counts…

By Charlatan126 - 03/02/2021 05:00 - United States - Hilliard

Today, I finally had a man say, "I love you" to me in a sincere tone. It was a customer, who was high, over the phone. I said it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 850

You deserved it 158

Say Anything 2: Electric Boogaloo

By Anonymous - 09/12/2010 06:00

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. He then told me that he will love me forever, wait for me and will follow me to the ends of the earth. Apparently, that means standing outside my door and calling my house phone every five minutes. It's been 3 hours straight now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 218

You deserved it 8 975

By Anonymous - 22/10/2012 03:19 - United States

Today, I got to drop off my boyfriend at his newest place of residence: jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 247

You deserved it 5 171

By brokenrelicslost - 08/01/2010 20:06 - United States

Today, I realized that I have completely fallen for this incredible guy, and that I'm really looking forward to where our relationship will take us. He just informed me that he will be doing jail time following his court date on Tuesday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 030

You deserved it 5 842

aback 4

Friday 7 January 2011 0:16

Run like the wind!

perdix 29

Friday 7 January 2011 0:22

He's probably feeling guilty since he involuntarily cheated on you while he was in the pokey.

Comments

shykid567 1

Friday 7 January 2011 0:35

Hahaha he prolly found sumone up in dat cell and wants 2 let u down easy

FMLRelapse 4

Friday 7 January 2011 1:04

there are a lot of those on here.

bubblezz0504 0

Friday 7 January 2011 1:29

Awww he loves you sooo much that he wants you to bail him out of jail. Haha(:

ahem_speak_up 0

Friday 7 January 2011 1:58

dump him.

KittehSayzRAWR 0

Friday 7 January 2011 2:02

...and what do you see in this guy?

magicstar 0

Friday 7 January 2011 2:03

he'll appreciate you more when he's getting ****** by gay horny dudes

ImaginaryFoe 0

Friday 7 January 2011 2:06

Another FML about a bloke who only says "I love you" after anal. How you feel about anal determines whether this is a win or a lose.

stevenmx86 7

Friday 7 January 2011 2:22

Ydi for dating a "bad boy"

Orieo56 0

Friday 7 January 2011 2:35

that's some hood stuff, I bet he drives an old chevy trunk right??

amyevalorraine 0

Friday 7 January 2011 3:24

Truck* and what is wrong with an old chevy? At least its not a f'n rice burner

Domo_Arigato7 3

Friday 7 January 2011 4:11

Leave him to be a prison bitch!!

Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I called off my engagement because I fell in love with my best friend of 10 years since we recently reconnected. I confessed my feelings to her and asked her out. She rejected me and said she only sees me as a friend. Now I’m completely single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 4 080

Today, while driving home, I looked in the rear-view mirror and saw that my three-year-old daughter had managed to get out of her seat and had crawled to the back window. I pulled over and strapped her in again. Five minutes later she was back at the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 219

You deserved it 5 961

The Top

Today, I have a bad case of diarrhea. The worst part isn’t even sharting in bed while sleeping naked. It’s the severe asshole pain from having to wipe my ass twenty times in twelve hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 720

You deserved it 156

Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 972

You deserved it 6 258

Today, I was lost in a new town, so I asked a woman for directions. For some reason, she seemed to avoid me. About halfway down the block, she quickly turned around, and the next thing I remember is my eyes stinging like hell. Apparently she thought I was a mugger and maced me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 201

You deserved it 4 163

Today, I'm still waiting for my ex, who yesterday afternoon told me that he'd be here within the hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 262

You deserved it 465

Today, I had to give my four year-old daughter some tough love, which I hate doing. When she ran away crying, my son, her twin brother, looked at me and said, "You should be ashamed of yourself." FML

I agree, your life sucks 944

You deserved it 436

Today, I finally had the confidence to show my girlfriend my hairy chest/stomach. I'm very self conscious about it, and get embarrassed easily. She said I looked disgusting, called me Chewbacca and broke up with me on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 309

You deserved it 7 157