Miscellaneous: Today, I accidentally farted while shopping. There was an awkward...

By oops - 04/03/2016 21:28 - United States - Mankato

Today, I accidentally farted while shopping. There was an awkward silence followed by a god-awful stink and a lady's little girl bursting into tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 047

You deserved it 3 420

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 19/07/2014 17:39 - United States - Cape Coral

Today, I was at the local grocery store. I've had really bad gas lately, and I accidentally let one go while standing in line. The woman behind me thought it was her kid, and smacked him for farting in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 569

You deserved it 41 812

By Anonymous - 17/07/2015 17:14 - United States - West Palm Beach

Today, I felt some serious gas building up while at the supermarket. I tried to quietly fart it out, only to end up sharting myself. I had to frantically waddle out of the store as discreetly as possible as several people in the vicinity freaked out and tried to locate the source of the smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 578

You deserved it 4 361

By combovercaiti_ - 25/01/2019 12:00

Today, I was waiting in line at the store trying to hold in a fart. I get to the cash register and the lady made me laugh and the fart slipped out. Only it was much louder than it was supposed to be, because I was squeezing my butt cheeks together, so it made a clapping sound. It was heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 289

You deserved it 372

By lambeaster - 20/01/2016 14:27 - United States - Washington

Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 825

You deserved it 3 714

By kykynevs - 23/08/2011 07:14 - United States

Today, while at the grocery store an elderly woman farted very loudly next to me. Everyone in the aisle looked our way. The woman pointed at me, and left the aisle. I received many disgusted looks from children and their parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 188

You deserved it 2 866

By Anonymous - 08/06/2014 02:34 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I went to the restroom to pee. A loud fart exploded out of my ass and echoed in the toilet bowl. I could practically feel my face on fire when I saw the horrified look on a little girl's face as I walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 077

You deserved it 6 688

By Anonymous - 18/01/2011 08:28 - United States

Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said, "That was my daughter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 167

You deserved it 3 833

By yogapants - 24/09/2010 20:21 - Switzerland

Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 249

You deserved it 14 868

Mambo number 6

By n/a - 25/11/2009 07:36 - United States

Today, I was working at a children's play centre, and my stomach was twisting and turning. Thinking no one was around, I let out a small fart, only to turn and see a little girl running to her mom, yelling, "Mommy! Mommy! That lady just farted and it sounded like daddy!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 125

You deserved it 27 545

By Anonymous - 18/12/2015 13:34 - Sri Lanka - Colombo

Today, I accidentally farted while on my flight home. It was silent but so deadly that several people were visibly distressed. The overweight guy sitting next to me got a bunch of dirty glares. I was too ashamed to own up to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 687

You deserved it 7 225

Recon13x 9

Saturday 5 March 2016 8:06

Run.

am1717 22

Saturday 5 March 2016 8:08

Silent but deadly :)

Comments

Recon13x 9

Saturday 5 March 2016 8:06

Run.

cheeeksss 29

Saturday 5 March 2016 10:29

But what if OP accidentally farts while running?

PencilTips 19

Saturday 5 March 2016 23:42

We all make mistakes, after all... we are human. Don't sweat it OP, nobody is going to remember it and you probably won't see those people again. Just make sure to not eat too much mexican/indian food before planning to do some shopping next time.

am1717 22

Saturday 5 March 2016 8:08

Silent but deadly :)

fushengyuan 20

Saturday 5 March 2016 8:11

Lmao, how does that not make u r day~

CheekyRaccoon 27

Saturday 5 March 2016 8:22

Plot twist the girl was crying because she hadn't smelt something so intoxicating and made her weep tears of joy.

Zarcissa 34

Saturday 5 March 2016 8:23

When I fart when shopping, I swiftly move elsewhere before the smell hits.

mm12344 8

Saturday 5 March 2016 9:58

You have to move slowly or the smell will follow you.

Steve97 32

Saturday 5 March 2016 8:25

Go to the bathroom then >.>

Yeshua_fml 19

Saturday 5 March 2016 8:25

It builds character.

snarkytruth 37

Saturday 5 March 2016 9:13

That calls for those Japanese Charcoal Activated Butt Pads.

MitchRapp 20

Saturday 5 March 2016 9:35

Dude. That's bad. Idk if I should be impressed or worried ;)

AngusEcrivain 18

Saturday 5 March 2016 10:36

I will never, ever understand why such a big deal is made about a fart. We all do them whether we admit it or no so just let rip. Besides, there's nought funnier!

snarkytruth 37

Saturday 5 March 2016 16:47

Your right it should be considered no worse than a yawn or hiccup. (I think they can be really funny.) However "eliminating" the stress and embarrassment would make them mundane and all the humor would "evaporate". I'd rather they be funny and everyone have a collection of good fart stories. It's one of the few things that can keep even the mightiest ego humble.