Intimacy: Today, I asked my boyfriend if I've gained weight. He replied,... - FML

By Anonymous - 10/12/2011 03:41 - United States

Spicy

Today, I asked my boyfriend if I've gained weight. He replied, "Why do you think I've been so often on top lately?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 872

You deserved it 8 987

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Thanks, honey.

By Fluffy - 13/12/2017 19:00

Today, I noticed that I've been gaining some weight. Don't worry, my boyfriend doesn't mind. His new favorite thing is putting my boobs on his head and saying he feels "safe". FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 650

You deserved it 919

By The fat and the ugly - 27/10/2011 18:56 - Finland

Spicy

Today, I was getting out of the shower, when my boyfriend decided to ask, "Did your boobs get smaller, or did you just gain weight around them?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 137

You deserved it 5 159

Epitaph

By Anonymous - 16/05/2020 14:00

Today, I asked my boyfriend to honestly tell me if I had become overweight. He replied that yes, I had, but that it was OK because I was his "Lumpy Space Princess." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 1 446

By notsoskinny - 18/04/2009 16:13 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I gained a few pounds and thought I looked fat. He replied that I looked the same and that I shouldn't worry because he likes fat girls. I never thought I was fat before this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 947

You deserved it 18 641

By Srain - 07/01/2010 06:36 - Australia

Today, feeling confident, I asked my boyfriend what he thought of my new body, since I had lost 16 kilos over the past month. He told me that he missed the old me and wanted me to gain weight again. My boyfriend was the one that encouraged me to lose weight in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 478

You deserved it 3 858

Roll with it

By anon - 17/09/2019 22:00

Today, my boyfriend encouragingly told me that he could tell I was losing weight, all because I had one roll fewer than usual on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 507

You deserved it 311

Awful line of inquiry

By teddyissmall - 14/04/2014 06:29 - Canada - Montréal

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 055

You deserved it 7 427

Hot bod

By Anonymous - 11/11/2010 08:39 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years told me that I appear to have gained some weight. After realizing that it made me feel depressed, he tried to make me feel better by making love to me. I decided to go with it. While doing so, he paused and said, "I'm sorry baby, but your weight is too much pressure for my back." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 660

You deserved it 8 692

By cc - 24/11/2009 05:03 - United States

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend about how I'm self conscious about my weight. He looks at me and says, "Don't worry babe, I've always been kind of a chubby chaser." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 486

You deserved it 7 910

Mr Romantic

By Mellon - 09/12/2021 01:59

Today, I was doubting my boyfriend's feelings for me, so I asked him if he found me attractive. He replied, "Well, you're thin enough…" That's all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 981

You deserved it 198

Next

Top comments

irokyoursox 6

Saturday 10 December 2011 8:35

Why do you need to ask someone of you've gained weight you can just step on a scale

Meme1988 18

Saturday 10 December 2011 8:31

Well, its less "work" for you :)

Comments

wittygirl 8

Saturday 10 December 2011 14:14

If your on top more you'd loose weight from the exercise. I think he likes the extra weight so enjoy the easy ride :D

xStaciexLynnx 15

Saturday 10 December 2011 14:30

71- Seriously?

zombicidal 11

Saturday 10 December 2011 14:58

missionary is also a sexual position to state what's obvious to everyone but 71

perdix 29

Saturday 10 December 2011 15:12

When you're sucking his dick and he tells, "Thar she blows!" That should have been a hint.

leadman1989 15

Saturday 10 December 2011 15:34

Yup you can have sex with a whale as long as you're on top. And you don't fall in.

JinxosGirl87 0

Saturday 10 December 2011 15:49

He puts you on the bottom because he doesn't want to see your flappy skin bouncing up and down as he slowly becomes one with the mattress. Aren't you glad that wasn't his response? ;P

ydi_4_suking 20

Saturday 10 December 2011 16:00

I guess 84 is a virgin...

daydreamer244 13

Saturday 10 December 2011 16:10

At least he told the truth....but he could've done it in a nicer way.

NoLongerExists 11

Saturday 10 December 2011 16:28

Welcome to FML. It's called a pun.

disney_blonde 16

Saturday 10 December 2011 16:33

Shouldn't you know if you've gained weight? Use a scale. Are your pants tighter?

2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Health Accident ADHD Medication Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Am I overreacting? Relationship advice Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I woke up from a night of serious depression, drinking by myself at home, to find a USB stick wrapped in plastic up my vagina, with "Top secret" written on it. There was nothing on the stick when I checked. I may need to give tequila a rest and switch back to gin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 1 831

...

I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 18

The Top

Today, I met my father for the first time since I was a baby. The first comment out of his mouth was, "I bet all the boys love those motherfucking bazongas, don't they?" Hi, Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 786

You deserved it 3 798

Today, I've realized that I, an introvert who prefers to be in the comfort of my own home, now prefer to stay out of the house as much as possible, because the obnoxious behavioral issues of my disobedient pets are making my life miserable. Is this how you become a workaholic? FML

I agree, your life sucks 247

You deserved it 1 043

Today, my dad came out of jail. He showed me his tattoo of a Bible on his chest with all his 13 kids' names on it. I'm the only one whose name is spelled wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 026

You deserved it 3 087

Today, the phone rang, it was some woman who wanted to speak to my dad. “It’s probably his mistress,” I said jokingly. Turns out it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 986

You deserved it 206

Today, my girlfriend broke it off with me when she realized I can no longer treat her to expensive gifts and meals. My ex-wife is bleeding me dry with child support payments, I can no longer afford the lifestyle I used to have. She won’t take me back. Now I’m totally single and broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 358

You deserved it 1 184

Today, I was trying to relieve a dog that looked like it was choking because it was tied to a pole while its owner was in a restaurant. The owner called a security guard because she was convinced I was trying to steal her dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 174

You deserved it 4 704