Kids: Today, I came home to my wife crying. She had mixed up our newborn...

By uselessdad - 07/09/2010 23:48 - Singapore

Today, I came home to my wife crying. She had mixed up our newborn twin girls and couldn't tell which was which. I looked at the girls. Neither could I. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 056

You deserved it 8 520

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By Anonymous - 01/10/2023 13:00 - United Kingdom - Altrincham

Today, I got home after working 14 hours completely exhausted and found my wife asleep, after not sleeping for at least 4 nights with our newborn. She woke up and couldn’t remember where she'd left the baby. After a mad panic, she remembered that he's with her mother. We are not coping very well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 928

You deserved it 162

By Anonymous - 01/11/2010 17:30 - United States

Today, I drove to the hospital to see my newborn. I went to the room, picked him out of the crate and held him. Then I heard the toilet flush and saw a woman who I didn't know come out. She screamed. My wife was in the room next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 496

You deserved it 10 376

By CutestBoysEver - 30/10/2012 01:30 - United States - Fruita

Today, I went to the hospital in labor expecting a baby boy. I ended the day with identical twins, a baffled doctor, and a husband convinced that our sons can clone themselves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 767

You deserved it 2 932

By Anonymous - 07/02/2012 18:15 - United States

Today, I saw my girlfriend at the store and joyfully greeted her. She got really mad at me - it was her identical twin sister, who I still cannot tell apart from my girlfriend. We've been dating for three years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 938

You deserved it 21 070

Father, you mean father

By Anonymous - 17/11/2020 02:02

Today, I found out wife has two baby daddies for our two kids. I’m neither one’s baby daddy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 151

You deserved it 96

New creepypasta dropped

By Sad mom - 21/07/2024 08:00 - United States - Riverview

Today, after I had a miscarriage in December, and finding out in June that I was 13 weeks pregnant with twins, I was told out that Baby B had consumed Baby A. FML

I agree, your life sucks 532

You deserved it 97

By beekeke45 - 25/06/2011 13:39 - United States

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 723

You deserved it 67 604

Hello from the other side

By losthusband - 11/10/2020 20:01 - United States

Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 173

You deserved it 205

By Xandar - 09/11/2018 17:30

Today, I was told by my wife that we were going to be parents. We are both females. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 456

You deserved it 520

They all look the same to me

By Anonymous - 29/09/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I picked up my daughter from daycare. As we were getting into the car, I strapped her into the car seat, but something felt off. I looked back and realized I had picked up the wrong kid. In my defense, she was wearing the same jacket as my daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 126

You deserved it 570

NicoleIsCrazy 0

Wednesday 8 September 2010 9:08

That REALLY SUCKS!

sourgirl101 28

Wednesday 8 September 2010 9:09

Foot prints records.

Comments

november14 0

Thursday 9 September 2010 14:53

hahahahaha this is the funniest and sweetest FML i've ever read!

MWF29FML 0

Friday 10 September 2010 5:12

My husband has twin brothers. I once asked his mom, "How sure are you that [so-and-so] is really [so-and-so] and [other one] is really [other one]?" Her answer: not at all sure! It'll make for a funny story in 20 years!

mschrisaya 4

Friday 10 September 2010 5:57

I agree. Paint their toe nails

suxforyou1225 0

Friday 10 September 2010 7:59

just guess, 50% chance ur rite

KusanagiStyle 3

Friday 10 September 2010 9:31

Hospitals are normally supposed to scar one of the children in a discrete place. It's normally a sliver on the back of the neck, or a sliver on a shoulder. Sucks for you for probably denying that option~

Doc_Holliday 0

Friday 10 September 2010 22:19

I would seriously brand them like cattle.

kevin1873 1

Saturday 11 September 2010 0:03

This is why stupid people shouldn't be allowed to breath, let alone breed. The hospital keeps finger and foot prints. Just take 'em back where you got 'em and figure out or better yet leave them there for a better family ;-)