Money: Today, I counted the amount of stuff that my dad had bought within...

By phonemenace - 17/08/2011 09:50 - United States

Today, I counted the amount of stuff that my dad had bought within a week: a brand new boat, car, and truck. He also has countless gadgets at his office, including a 60" television. Our house is literally falling apart but Mr. Midlife-crisis won't do anything to help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 795

You deserved it 2 827

Back to school: Courses and confusion
When the campus comes back to life, anecdotes abound between the lecture halls and student parties! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Colin Jr. - 23/09/2015 13:24 - United States

Today, it's the third week of my dad's midlife crisis. So far he's blown half my college fund pimping out his piece of shit car, keeps texting me meme pictures, and keeps yelling "Savage!" and "Recked!" any time my mom makes a joke at anyone's expense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 793

You deserved it 1 696

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 10:22 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad started his mid-life crisis. Instead of a Porsche or a Ferrari, he bought a tractor. Goodbye summer holiday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 707

You deserved it 2 422

Growing old disgracefully

By adam - 05/12/2015 14:54 - Czech Republic

Today, my dad is having his midlife crisis, bought a Mercedes, along with having a girlfriend less than half his age. I was trying to be supportive, until I found out he is funding his midlife crisis with my university loan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 267

You deserved it 1 559

By mazzer - 04/01/2012 02:04 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad had a day off and was 'bored' so he decided to move our entire kitchen into our living room. We now have no running water, no oven that works and the entire house is a bombsite. He has an entire week off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 045

You deserved it 2 266

Family matters

By Anonymous - 22/06/2023 06:00

Today, in response to the guy whose son told him to fuck off for disturbing his one day off a week, my son spent literally his entire savings account for a deposit on a shitbox one bedroom house because he’s sick of his dad finding him things to do every ten minutes, and I don’t even blame him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 679

You deserved it 237

Midlife crisis in style

By Anonymous - 15/03/2022 14:00

Today, my husband started his midlife crisis with a bang, or rather several bangs, as he admitted that there are two women out there pregnant with his babies. Oh, and he quit his job to escape the daily grind. Oh, and he remortgaged the house to buy a truck so we could go cross country. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 466

You deserved it 109

This is why I left home

By Anonymous - 09/03/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, I was asked to stay at my parents' house for a week while my mom stays with my dying grandfather. Dad greeted me with a whole list of chores to do every day when I'm not at work, and won't even so much as let me use my laptop when I'm not busy. He does nothing but waste money on eBay all day and doesn't help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 510

You deserved it 109

Don't drink and DIY

By bob the builders pissed off daughter - 29/12/2015 23:52 - United States - Campbell

Today, my dad got drunk and decided to fix everything in the house he thought was broken. Now the oven won't cook, half the floorboards from the stairs are piled in the garden, we put the TV back together but now it is stuck on mute, and we still have no idea where he has put my bedroom door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 039

You deserved it 1 402

Wrecked

By Anonymous - 13/04/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, my dad is mad at me because I refused to buy a truck. An ugly old Isuzu with two flat tires and a missing headlight, and the owner said it needed a new transmission & brakes, but still wanted $8000. Apparently, without consulting me, Dad promised him I'd buy it as payment for guns he bought. Now he's in debt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 533

You deserved it 76

Survivor

By whyyy - 21/11/2011 23:26 - United States

Today, I came home to find my dad's mid-life crisis has finally started. He's blacked all our windows, barricaded the door to the backyard, and set up a bunch of security cameras in and out of the house. It seems he's been reading up on Survivalist and Masonic conspiracy theory bullshit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 899

You deserved it 2 678

ThreeSheetsGone 12

Wednesday 17 August 2011 19:02

Never stand between a man and his toys. Never.

TN9R 1

Wednesday 17 August 2011 19:02

damn. you must be rich! he should buy a new house while hes at it.

Comments

MrSquiggles 2

Thursday 18 August 2011 3:46

Trade the car for another truck, then form the truck-boat-truck

_Allstar_ 2

Thursday 18 August 2011 3:51

Somethings a little backwards isnt it? haha but hey all that stuff is pretty awesome!!

superguppy19 3

Thursday 18 August 2011 4:09

Sounds like my daddy

vbmg152 18

Thursday 18 August 2011 5:08

I feel your pain! My hubby's the same way!!

dregray 1

Thursday 18 August 2011 5:27

He probably got a bachelor pad being built somewhere, oops ur momma not suppose to know about that

adam_1684 0

Thursday 18 August 2011 6:00

Don't hate. Priorities lol!

divadro102 16

Thursday 18 August 2011 8:01

Rich toys. Poor house? You must be confused

Stoneyyay 5

Thursday 18 August 2011 8:46

74 ur a bitch... that is all

lopezk 0

Thursday 18 August 2011 14:49

& this is an issue bcuz? ??

Arch27 27

Thursday 18 August 2011 15:14

I'm not there yet, but I know my midlife crisis item will be a Royal Enfield Bullet G5 Military motorcycle. Thing is, I can afford it. Mortgage is under control. The house isn't falling apart. Everything else is paid off. Sucks for the OP!