Money: Today, I didn't realize until I was home that I'd thrown my retainer... - FML

By idgit42 - 27/07/2010 22:15 - United States

Today, I didn't realize until I was home that I'd thrown my retainer away with my tray at Chick-fil-A. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 743

You deserved it 30 351

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Same thing different taste

By pplsuck - 25/09/2012 23:57 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot my straw. I took my purse with me, not wanting it to get stolen. Someone stole my food instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 320

You deserved it 2 779

By stephiexbabexx - 15/01/2010 21:27 - United States

Today, I was with my friends at Burger King. While we were eating, I placed my cellphone on the tray, not realising that I'd left it there until after I emptied my tray into the bin. When I got it out of the trash, it was covered in soggy, sticky garbage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 824

You deserved it 39 473

By Eyalsh - 30/01/2015 04:53 - Germany - Greifswald

Today, I came back to my dormitory after a long shift at work. After using the toilet, I looked at myself in the mirror, only to find a huge piece of food stuck between my front teeth. I work at one of the fanciest restaurants in town; nobody bothered to tell me anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 403

You deserved it 2 799

Moist

By HonestlyVirgoHonesty - 01/05/2022 14:00

Today, I went to go soak my dentures because I fell asleep wearing them last night, only to find that my boyfriend threw away the container they were in, thinking it was trash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 868

You deserved it 107

Sticky situation

By CodyS - 03/09/2013 05:03 - United States - Rocky River

Today, on my lunch break, I ran to the gas station, and threw some trash away on my way in. On my way out, I realized my keys were missing. Thinking I threw them away, and fearing that I'd be late returning to work, I tore through the disgusting trash only to find my keys on the seat of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 218

You deserved it 11 284

Brainrot

By queenbee12345678 - 19/02/2012 19:29 - United States

Today, I accidentally left my cell phone at the restaurant. When I realized my mistake, I went back to see if anyone had found it. They said no, so I gave them my number to call if it turned up. I realized later that I'd given them my cell phone number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 969

You deserved it 26 502

By Tired Hungry Geek - 27/10/2015 04:40 - United States

Today, I was exhausted after a long day at work and didn't feel like cooking so I went to a drive thru. I placed my order, went to the window and paid. I then drove off without my food and didn't realize it for a couple of blocks. I was too embarrassed to go back and get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 681

You deserved it 10 328

By Anonymous - 05/10/2011 05:28 - United States

Today, a woman somehow managed to drop her wedding ring into the garbage at the fast food place where I work. I had to search through a full bag of half eaten food and soda to find it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 335

You deserved it 2 737

By Fox_Undercover - 30/04/2016 20:33 - United States - Wareham

Today, my dentist pulled the wrong tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 445

You deserved it 2 954

Introvert struggles

By knife knife - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Dalkeith

Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 919

You deserved it 15 488

Next

Top comments

SirWhatsHisFace 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 2:00

What is this OP, a rap? The last part of the FML ryhmes.

Vehicle 1

Wednesday 28 July 2010 2:04

I've been without braces for several years and I quit wearing my retainers like I was supposed to and my teeth are fine.

Comments

Night_terror 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:51

28, you are absolutely the most gorgeous girl I have ever seen.

imhowie 2

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:55

This is one of the weakest FMLs i've ever seen! Most people I know, including myself, all did that at lunch at one point in high school.

gothic_angel_13 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:58

that happened to one of my friends. at skool she accidently threw away her retainer

katieann 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 3:58

best resturaunt ever!!!!!! love it!!!!! I'm sorry about your retainer though. I've done that before 2

120796gators 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:12

great advice

brclark80 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:16

I did this in elementary school, sucks

RPattzs_gurl 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:23

Dang that sucks OP! When they gave me mine they told me to take care of it because they're expensive but I never even used it except for like one day. And my teeth are getting crooked again :(

derrable 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:55

the old "forget your precious belonging on your tray and throw it away"...classic!

talb1 7

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:57

I've seen that in a cartoon...

crusader55 0

Wednesday 28 July 2010 4:59

yeah that sucks, my mom ended up throwing mine away when we were out to eat and her and the waiter dug in the trashcan for it, it was sick

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, and for the past week, I’ve had a viral bug. Now I can handle the vomiting, the diarrhoea, headaches, muscle weakness, dizziness, fatigue, and coughing. What I cannot handle is how food and drink now taste bad. Like seriously, even water tastes bad. I’m slowly going insane from lack of flavour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 371

You deserved it 74

Today, after being so jaded by failed relationships, I'd given a guy who slid into my Facebook Messenger a chance. We'd entered the talking stage, only to be told four months later that he’s found a girlfriend, and no longer wants to continue this interaction and blocked me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 630

You deserved it 276

The Top

Today, my car was stolen from my driveway. I reported it to the police, the insurance company, and my neighbors, and begged for help via social media. As I walked to catch a bus, I saw my car parked outside my school. I forgot I left it there last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 572

You deserved it 45 727

Today, I was watching an animal behavior movie. All of a sudden, it brings up two snails going at it. I got hard watching it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 909

You deserved it 45 023

Today, I got locked inside my office again by my co-workers because they had forgotten I was still around when they left. This happens 1 or 2 times a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 072

You deserved it 4 428

Today, my mom decided it was a good idea to put a camera in my room so I could be watched at all times, to make sure I'm behaving. I'm 14. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 825

You deserved it 291

Today, I was running the drive-thru window at work, when a man pulled up with his dog in the seat next to him. As he was counting out his change, the dog leaned over his hand and drooled all over it. Not only did he pay exclusively in coins, those coins were slimy from dog drool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 965

You deserved it 2 890

Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 346

You deserved it 58 544