Health: Today, I farted at a crowded concert, and people started commenting...

By Anonymous - 23/02/2016 05:01 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I farted at a crowded concert, and people started commenting on said fart. I specifically went out of my way to eat certain foods all day so that it wouldn't happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 305

You deserved it 2 799

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Same thing different taste

By Concert Flatulent - 10/07/2012 04:44 - United States - Marshall

Today, I went to an orchestra concert. Halfway through the performance I had to fart really bad, so I decided to try and sneak it in while the orchestra was playing a loud exciting part. Just as I let it rip, there was a dramatic pause in the music. Everyone heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 992

You deserved it 29 179

By Anonymous - 28/11/2010 08:07 - United States

Today, I went to a very crowded restaurant. Being really shy, I requested to sit in the corner, but instead they placed me in the center of the dinning area. I started to eat my food and got really spaced out. Suddenly I sneeze-farted and everyone turned to look at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 055

You deserved it 7 199

By Gob - 16/01/2009 14:36 - United States

Today, while waiting for class, I let out a huge fart in front of everyone thinking no one would hear it over the music. I was wearing headphones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 823

You deserved it 42 656

Leaked

By Morgan Bailey - 18/09/2018 14:00

Today, I tried to let out a small fart in a crowded restaurant. I had diarrhea. I walked past several families to get to the bathroom and clean myself up, only to still go home with a huge wet spot down my ass. My shirt wasn't long enough to hide it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 746

You deserved it 893

By Smirky - 13/02/2017 02:30 - India - Bangalore

Today, while walking down the aisle of a movie theatre, I passed gas so loudly that the audience missed the climax of the film laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 642

You deserved it 1 720

By Anonymous - 17/07/2015 17:14 - United States - West Palm Beach

Today, I felt some serious gas building up while at the supermarket. I tried to quietly fart it out, only to end up sharting myself. I had to frantically waddle out of the store as discreetly as possible as several people in the vicinity freaked out and tried to locate the source of the smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 580

You deserved it 4 362

By Hth - 28/10/2008 00:13 - United States

Today, I farted A LOT during an exam, all silent, so I figured I should be OK. Then I looked around and everybody was suffocating and giving me sly looks. I'm now known to everyone in the department as SuperFart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 331

You deserved it 43 745

By combovercaiti_ - 25/01/2019 12:00

Today, I was waiting in line at the store trying to hold in a fart. I get to the cash register and the lady made me laugh and the fart slipped out. Only it was much louder than it was supposed to be, because I was squeezing my butt cheeks together, so it made a clapping sound. It was heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 290

You deserved it 372

By Anonymous - 18/12/2015 13:34 - Sri Lanka - Colombo

Today, I accidentally farted while on my flight home. It was silent but so deadly that several people were visibly distressed. The overweight guy sitting next to me got a bunch of dirty glares. I was too ashamed to own up to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 688

You deserved it 7 225

By oops - 04/03/2016 21:28 - United States - Mankato

Today, I accidentally farted while shopping. There was an awkward silence followed by a god-awful stink and a lady's little girl bursting into tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 048

You deserved it 3 420

jfj126 13

Tuesday 23 February 2016 12:18

Just be glad you didn't shart.

lightningclicks 24

Tuesday 23 February 2016 12:17

farts are the poop screaming to get out

Comments

ENAJonas 5

Wednesday 24 February 2016 1:26

Those types of foods are usually the ones that do it the most!!

scyth3s 13

Wednesday 24 February 2016 1:43

So... You realize changes in diet can cause farts, right? Even non gassy foods.

ndaguanno 17

Wednesday 24 February 2016 4:54

Could of taken beano as well

AdamTodddBrown 11

Wednesday 24 February 2016 15:02

Lol certain foods to avoid farting? And, a concert where people had time to comment on a fart? Who the **** are you?

citrusglass 22

Wednesday 24 February 2016 22:20

Well, what can you do? Nice effort though, OP.

hilfiger_fml 5

Thursday 25 February 2016 1:33

How is this an fml? You must live a blessed life!

honestjane 22

Thursday 25 February 2016 6:05

It is unacceptable to fart in public unless the music is loud and you keep moving.

thatonechicksaid 12

Thursday 25 February 2016 19:53

I'm sorry but that's funny

Ferret_Mummy 10

Saturday 27 February 2016 20:19

Gas away Fartzilla. Everyone farts and everyone's shit stinks no matter how much they deny it

Boomi 38

Wednesday 13 September 2017 3:41

Pumbaa is real! Hakuna matata!

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I agree, your life sucks 4 279

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Today, I attended my son's Christmas concert. When I went to sit down in the last available seat, a woman said she was saving it for her husband. Having nowhere else to sit, I stood in the back, for an hour. The seat remained empty for the entire concert. FML

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Same thing different taste

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