Miscellaneous: Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger...

By pootie - 11/12/2013 13:14 - United States - Miami

Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 578

You deserved it 7 567

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Same thing different taste

By embarassed - 21/04/2011 03:24 - United States

Today, I fell asleep at a party. I farted so loud that I woke myself up. Everyone heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 345

You deserved it 12 939

By Anonymous - 18/12/2015 13:34 - Sri Lanka - Colombo

Today, I accidentally farted while on my flight home. It was silent but so deadly that several people were visibly distressed. The overweight guy sitting next to me got a bunch of dirty glares. I was too ashamed to own up to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 684

You deserved it 7 224

By Wowsers. - 30/01/2010 08:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 805

You deserved it 36 004

By sleeper - 02/03/2010 05:05 - France

Today, I was on the train when I fell asleep. Everything would have been fine but I was suddenly jerked awake by the very loud sound of my own fart, followed by the stares of many strangers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 310

You deserved it 6 069

On the down low

By Anonymous - 31/07/2024 06:00 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, during a long flight, I tried to discreetly pass gas. Instead, I misjudged the pressure and ended up making a loud noise that everyone around me seemingly heard. To make matters worse, the flight attendant asked if everything was OK. Now I’m probably remembered as "Farts on a plane." FML

I agree, your life sucks 168

You deserved it 456

Threat Neutralized

By Anonymous - 23/07/2018 18:36 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, I farted so loudly in my sleep that it woke myself, my husband, and our cat. The cat let me know he was startled by clawing and biting the perceived threat, my bum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 315

You deserved it 730

Alarm

By Anonymous - 09/08/2012 14:26 - United States

Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 589

You deserved it 4 009

By The horror... - 11/11/2015 16:52 - United Kingdom - Luton

Today, I farted myself awake, in a car full of my boyfriend's family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 375

You deserved it 3 172

Single shot

By irulan - 14/01/2020 03:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I farted so loudly in bed and I woke up my husband. Startled, he thought that someone was entered in our room and fired a shot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 539

You deserved it 599

Drunk hookup ends with a… bang

By Anonymous - 14/10/2019 12:00

Today, I woke myself up by farting in my sleep, only to realize that the guy I'd brought home from the bar was still next to me. He was awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 477

You deserved it 554

emily689 25

Wednesday 11 December 2013 19:05

I'm guessing you blew him away.

Bradley_Dillon 39

Wednesday 11 December 2013 19:04

I'm jealous. :o I've never accomplished something like that.

Comments

jgriff79 23

Wednesday 11 December 2013 21:07

That damn plane makes weird noises!

snackswell37 4

Wednesday 11 December 2013 21:10

What did that smell like?

squarecircles 13

Wednesday 11 December 2013 21:23

Could it have been the airline food?

BeepBeepSwerve 9

Wednesday 11 December 2013 21:46

Looks like you found yourself a new alarm clock, and its free!

ZY1431 24

Wednesday 11 December 2013 22:13

I'm surprised the pilot didn't go over the PA and say that the plane hit sudden turbulence.

azyjazy713 11

Wednesday 11 December 2013 23:03

Hopefully u both laughed about it and held your noses. If not, awkward but it is natural.

wildmonkey 16

Wednesday 11 December 2013 23:38

Was there any turbulence afterwards?

Sirpence 9

Thursday 12 December 2013 4:05

Crack a window crack a window air it out

Sirpence 9

Thursday 12 December 2013 4:06

The power of Zues lives in your anus.

ohhhsnapple 14

Thursday 12 December 2013 4:47

Amazing username.

Keywords

Embarrassing Accident Work Health Relatable LGBTQIA+ Love Annoying AITA Inappropriate Relationship advice My ex Animals Cute Cats Friends Awkward Cars Transportation Dogs Money Scams Miscellaneous Kids Family Drugs Public freakouts Intimacy Sex Cheating

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USA, USA, USA; well, almost. Today we're not welcoming a French artist, not even an American artist, but an artist from... oh, you'll see! Are you in a hurry or something? Why can't we just sit down, have a nice cup of tea and talk about the future? ...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 3

Today, I felt like spicing up our marriage, so I thought I'd surprise my husband when he got home from work. I put on my sexiest teddy, lit some candles, and laid on the bed. He walked in the room, looked at me for a second, farted, then asked me what was for dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 295

You deserved it 4 746

The Top

Today, I discovered that the wintergreen breath mints I've been taking for a week now, are actually circular, flavored, white and green laxatives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 239

You deserved it 28 473

Today, we were practicing figure drawing in art class. Our regular model didn't show up, so our teacher pulled someone out of study hall. And who did she pick? My ex-boyfriend, who stalked me after our breakup, which resulted in a nervous breakdown that put me in therapy. It was a long class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 846

You deserved it 3 324

Today, while sitting in a waiting room, a man assured me "The safety's on" after he handed his kid his BB gun. A minute later, I practically had a hole in my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 033

You deserved it 2 969

Today, I was serving a rude and obnoxious couple at a restaurant. They made outrageous demands, then they got up and snuck out while I wasn’t looking. They were kind enough to leave a “tip” on the receipt they hadn’t paid for, saying, “Maybe if you lost weight you’d be fast enough to catch us!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 221

You deserved it 145

Today, I got ready for work in the dark, and it was noon before someone told me that I had one of my wife's pantyliners stuck to the back of my pants. I'd just given a presentation to 80 people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 910

You deserved it 175

Today, my girlfriend accused me of cheating after she read some of my messages I sent to an old female friend. Apparently I'm very flirty with her. I showed her the same kind of messages that I sent to my guy friends as well. Now I'm apparently gay and cheating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 816

You deserved it 2 742