Intimacy: Today, I finally figured out why my mechanic was so cheap; he...

By Anonymous - 12/08/2011 00:49 - United States

Today, I finally figured out why my mechanic was so cheap; he wanted to sleep with me. After I politely declined, he charged me regular price plus extra for "humiliating" him. He's 60. I just recently turned 18. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 712

You deserved it 3 426

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/10/2014 21:51 - United States - Lemont

Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 714

You deserved it 24 332

By nowimbroketoo - 22/07/2013 17:47 - Australia - Beaumaris

Today, the guy whose son I babysat for six hours straight confessed to being broke, then actually asked if he could pay me with sex instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 269

You deserved it 4 351

By Anonymous - 14/11/2012 07:18 - United States

Today, excited that I finally got a place of my own, I invited my boyfriend over for a sexy sleep over. He told me his mom doesn't want him sleeping over. He's 21 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 134

You deserved it 4 666

By niii - 26/11/2008 04:26 - France

Today, as I often do, I had sex in my old car. I'm 25, my boyfriend is 28 and we're still living with our parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 251

You deserved it 14 052

By Chelsea - 02/04/2012 17:31 - United States

Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 450

You deserved it 38 898

I don't get paid enough for this

By Anonymous - 05/10/2010 09:41 - United States

Today, I was at work on a smoke break. I work at a truck stop, and it was around 2 a.m. Some old man pulled in and asked me if I would like to join him for some dinner. I said no, and told him I was working. He replied, "How much do you charge?" Apparently, even in sweats I look like a hooker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 350

You deserved it 6 714

The price of love

By that kind of girl - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - Canada - Mississauga

Today, a man asked me on a date. It's been so long, I accepted immediately. He began quoting what seemed like random numbers to me, and it took me a few minutes to work out what he meant. Not only was I mistaken for a prostitute, I'm also worth, at most, $60. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 751

You deserved it 5 060

Get it where you can

By a…… - 07/02/2023 22:00 - Argentina

Today, my mom came home unusually early from work and walked in on me hooking up with a guy. What made it more embarrassing is the fact that I’m 19 and my hookup is 52. FML

I agree, your life sucks 260

You deserved it 1 797

Is this why they hate millennials? Because we won't date them?

By Graverobber - 23/11/2018 14:00

Today, as I was fueling my truck, I was asked out to dinner by a 65-year-old retiree. I'm 25. He stormed off and called me a bitch for politely turning him down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 012

You deserved it 290

A tale as old as time

By I'm_Not_Interested - 06/07/2015 05:30 - United States - Reno

Today, I found out the only reason why a friend of mine even bothered talking to me. He thought that I'd sleep with him if he was nice enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 219

You deserved it 2 899

hannahtaskey 9

Friday 12 August 2011 9:20

Horny old man...

borntoperform 14

Friday 12 August 2011 9:20

Bow chicka wow wow

Comments

kidcanada 4

Friday 12 August 2011 21:54

Men will usually have sex with women reguardless their age

portcaveman 5

Friday 12 August 2011 22:19

that is just weird

little_metalbear 0

Friday 12 August 2011 23:22

fyl, he could be your grandpa!

stewy78 2

Friday 12 August 2011 23:52

What a bunch of squares

Calyx_fml 21

Saturday 13 August 2011 0:15

Today, the woman I have given hundreds of dollars of free service to refused to service me. Then she got all upset when I tried to recover my expenses. FML