Love: Today, I finally landed a new job, and thinking he would be proud,...

By shampoogirl - 26/08/2011 18:26 - United States

Today, I finally landed a new job, and thinking he would be proud, I told my boyfriend. Instead of congratulating me, he got mad that my work hours include Saturday, his laundry day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 098

You deserved it 4 246

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Equality

By Anonymous - 10/07/2023 10:00 - Germany

Today, my boyfriend keeps mentioning how well his new job pays, while I don’t have any income. He then got upset when I expected him to pay for the groceries I got on my way to his new place. What I bought was stuff I needed so I could cook for him, and for me to eat while I’m there, cleaning and fixing stuff for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 305

Classic

By Anonymous - 05/02/2021 18:30 - United States - Newport News

Today, after I helped get my boyfriend get a new job, he thanked me by dumping me for some whore who works there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 980

You deserved it 1 242

By wtf - 01/07/2017 16:00

Today, I got yelled at multiple times by my boss because my boyfriend didn't show up to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 832

You deserved it 444

By Anonymous - 31/10/2012 06:18 - United States

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by showing up at my work and proposing to me. It was sweet until an angry customer bitched us out for "wasting her time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 178

You deserved it 3 606

By "bluebird97" - 28/12/2018 20:00

Today, my boyfriend called work because he is sick. Then he called me 4 times while I was working, to complain that I was working, and then he got mad when I told him I was sick and worked a double shift 2 days in a row, apparently that is insensitive of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 766

You deserved it 262

By jenA - 12/07/2012 02:40 - United States

Today, I got a sweet promotion at my job. Instead of being happy and celebrating with me, my boyfriend broke up with me because he is jealous that I'm more successful than he is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 462

You deserved it 2 679

Quota

By lazy pregnant girl - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that because he works fifty hours a week, I should be meeting an arbitrary quota of fifty hours of housework, and if I don't, I'm insensitive and ungrateful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 245

You deserved it 10 489

Toxic masculinity = No housework

By sigh - 24/11/2011 19:30 - United States

Today, my boyfriend got upset after I politely asked him to do the laundry. He takes every chance he gets to act macho and brag to people about how he's in the Marines, but apparently he is too much of a pussy to act like a man and clean his own clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 743

You deserved it 6 639

Sore loser

By Anonymous - 10/01/2021 15:01 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, after graduating from the same program, I was offered several jobs, while my boyfriend wasn’t. He couldn’t be happy for me, saying, "She got in with the right people, and they just keep handing her jobs," and dismissing my work ethic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 287

You deserved it 162

By HK - 16/05/2012 22:38 - United Kingdom - Haywards Heath

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 014

You deserved it 3 824

Laurenlou 24

Friday 26 August 2011 23:12

Tell him to get off his ass and do the laundry himself! Psh.

FunnyGuy5051 7

Friday 26 August 2011 23:08

mines Sunday

Comments

somerandomdude19 2

Friday 26 August 2011 23:41

Somebodys gonna be stinky :P

sarabraun8 7

Friday 26 August 2011 23:46

You're his bitch

Souners 3

Friday 26 August 2011 23:48

It's not like you have to work 24 hours that day. Let him know you'll have plenty of time for his laundry.

shanatilly89 11

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:43

Make him do his own laundry

redneckhoney91 0

Saturday 27 August 2011 3:19

^^exactly he has two hands and two legs it won't kill him to wash his own clothes

2ndSucks 15

Friday 26 August 2011 23:54

Use the money you make to buy him fabric softener for his next birthday. Or Tide.

tj4234 35

Friday 26 August 2011 23:57

well I hope you land yourself a new boyfriend as well!

DncrHap 9

Friday 26 August 2011 23:59

silly girl. thinking you belong anywhere but the kitchen or laundry room. tsk tsk.

BigPerro4life 0

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:07

A woman's gotta know her place. Just tell him you'll do the laundry after work Saturday or on Sunday.

asktherunes 4

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:23

He sounds like such a catch !!!! One I would throw back in the water.

LittlestOne13 6

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:27

He has to get off his lazy ass and do his damn laundry!!

bananabuttercup 8

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:28

Wait, he expects you to do this laundry every week? What, are you dating a sexist 10 year old? He can do his own damn laundry.

Keywords

Awkward Love My ex AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Sports Proposal Annoying Snow Cold weather Cheating Work Money Relatable Kids Parenting DIY Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird

The Top

Today, it's the first day of my two-week stay at my in-laws' house. They forbid drinking, smoking, cursing, and anything even remotely sexual. I smuggled in my quietest toy to keep me sane in this holy house. If only I hadn't forgotten to bring the battery pack too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 966

You deserved it 29 847

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 189

You deserved it 11 246

The Top

Today, I finally got the courage to approach a girl. I've never done anything like this before. She stared me down, not saying a word, until I felt so little that I just walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 751

You deserved it 8 795

Today, I logged onto facebook, and saw that one of my friends had just listed herself as in a relationship. I was happy for her, so I clicked the "like" button. Then I went to her page to see who her new boyfriend was. It was my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 594

You deserved it 4 705

Today, after spending at least two hours on the phone every day for the past week, my health insurer I pay a huge monthly premium to agreed to cover my life-sustaining insulin. But they won't contribute to the cost until after I've paid an unaffordable deductible first. I'm going to die even though I'm insured. FML

I agree, your life sucks 550

You deserved it 90

Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house, dying to pee during a thunderstorm. Ran to the bathroom, but it was occupied. A huge thunderclap scared me pretty bad. When the door finally opened, my girlfriend's mom walked out, laughing. I realized the thunder scared me into peeing my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 460

You deserved it 453

Today, I started my new job at a restaurant I really like. As I waited on my first customer, I suggested that he try the apple pie, because it's my favourite. He looked up at me and said, "Yeah? Figures! Lay off 'em, porky!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 391

You deserved it 6 123

Today, I found out that my grandson is actually my stepson, my son is his half-brother, and my soon to be ex-husband impregnated our son’s wife, who’s a third his age. Yet somehow my slimy ex is the victim in all this because our son beat him to a bloody pulp while I did nothing to stop it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 599

You deserved it 98