Miscellaneous: Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had...

By IAmACoolCat - 05/07/2011 16:41 - United States

Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had to take a crap" and didn't want to stink up his own bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 521

You deserved it 4 962

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Morning conversation

By Anonymous - 15/03/2021 08:01

Today, I went into the bathroom only to discover my dad on the pot. “Oh, sorry”, I say and turn to leave. His reply, “Oh I don’t mind. Just having a shit here.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 697

You deserved it 197

By fugachumi - 07/08/2011 08:08 - United States

Today, I discovered that every morning at around 3:00 my dad takes a monumental dump in my bathroom. When I confronted him about it he denied it. He still does it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 838

You deserved it 3 514

Let that sink in

By vegasman20002 - 18/05/2024 06:00 - United States - Garden City

Today, my father-in-law shat himself in my bathroom and tried to flush some of the evidence down my sink. Sink that I'd just cleaned up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 445

You deserved it 62

By mikey51 - 10/03/2012 01:56 - Australia

Today, I was taking a dump, when my dad shouted for me to go wash the dishes. Fed up with his constant shit, I told him to bite me. He took this as an invitation to wedge the bathroom door shut for nearly two hours, despite all my pleas and apologies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 632

You deserved it 41 589

Never going to live this down

By Anonymous - 01/09/2023 10:00 - United States - Warren

Today, I went up to take a shower. I typically go to the bathroom first, I take a mega dump, then flush the toilet. Not only wouldn't the toilet flush but I found out my parents only keep one plunger on hand. It was in the downstairs bathroom. My dad came upstairs and plunged the toilet while I stood there naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 500

You deserved it 280

By Anonymous - 11/11/2014 18:56 - United States - Dekalb

Today, I walked into my bathroom, only to find my dad passed out on the floor with his pants around his ankles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 095

You deserved it 3 061

By Anonymous - 02/06/2011 14:10 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad came to visit me. By visit I mean he arrived, took a huge smelly dump and left. This is the first time I've seen my dad in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 008

You deserved it 3 075

By obtuse_ballsack - 04/06/2012 20:37 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 717

You deserved it 2 759

By whatchagonnado - 24/03/2013 07:35 - Canada - Victoria

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, I needed to use the bathroom. I decided to be a good girlfriend and leave the seat up for him. He later yelled at me for not putting the seat down because he needed to take a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 953

You deserved it 8 897

By EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - 17/08/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 296

You deserved it 7 527

cessily 8

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:11

I happen to be taking a crap right now

captainbj2 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:13

who pays for the bathroom? I think it is HIS bathroom....

Comments

amberboo2kewl4u 0

Friday 8 July 2011 4:29

man my dad does that shit too then yells at me when I don't want to clean the bathroom after

baby_dee97 8

Friday 8 July 2011 4:31

oh my gosh. my dad does that too.

CondomSense 4

Friday 8 July 2011 7:59

his house dumb ****

kitzac94 0

Friday 8 July 2011 8:28

been there done that. then I walked in and he totally ruined my bathroom I left the fan on and sprayed it with oust for a couple hours off and on!

BoxTops11 0

Saturday 9 July 2011 4:18

my dad says that too...

kyleawq 0

Saturday 9 July 2011 12:11

boo hoo, no different then your shit. get over it princess!

annaHU4L49 0

Saturday 9 July 2011 14:34

my dad does that. -____________-

fknrad 0

Saturday 9 July 2011 21:40

if he is your dad then it is indeed not your bathroom

edgarme85 0

Sunday 10 July 2011 15:08

it's his house!! stop your wynning!!!

9WTF8 1

Thursday 14 July 2011 6:26

if i were u i would walk into his and take a giant crap in his toilet and stink it up, judt to piss him off :D

Keywords

Love Party Lonely Awkward ADHD Transportation Cars Ironic Vacation Work Mental health Miscellaneous Grandparents Accident Covid Health Kids Annoying Cute Shopping Coworkers Dogs Animals Photography Art Videos Exhausted Sex Intimacy Money

The Top

Today, my long distance girlfriend of almost two years broke up with me because I didn't like her drinking and driving. Her reasoning was, "I don't go out that often so what's the problem?" or "I'm safe when I drive drunk." Yeah? How many drunk drivers thought the same then wrapped their car around a tree? FML

I agree, your life sucks 481

You deserved it 94

Today, like every other day, my mother, who I live with due to circumstances outside my control, harasses me every twenty minutes and generally treats me like her personal slave. When I dared complain, she had the audacity to tell me I’m lucky to “live a life of service.” Yeah, fuck you too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 185

The Top

Today, my friend got drunk. We tried to get him into a cab, he punched me in the face, three chavs then accosted me, accusing me of trying to mug him. I was then beaten up by said chavs and then the police charged me for being drunk and disorderly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 305

You deserved it 3 466

Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 354

You deserved it 6 819

Today, I’m on vacation in Peru in the Amazonian forest. I woke up in the middle of the night to the noise of a snake moving around on my bed. I screamed so loudly that one of the locals woke up and came to have a look. When I explained, he laughed his ass off and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 647

You deserved it 97

Today, I was telling my aunt that I had achieved my blue belt in karate. Looking at my short hair, she says, "You're going to end up a lesbian." Thanks Aunt L. Love you too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 456

You deserved it 5 035

Today, I'm two months pregnant and can only seem to eat plain food consisting of mostly cheese. Now I’m constipated and haven’t pooped in two days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 802

You deserved it 209

Today, I went to my parents' for dinner, who greeted me outside and immediately my mom said, “What are you wearing? Go to my room and change your shirt.” I was with my husband and I’m 47. FML

I agree, your life sucks 849

You deserved it 139

Same thing different taste

Morning conversation

Let that sink in

Never going to live this down

Top comments

Comments