Miscellaneous: Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had... - FML

By IAmACoolCat - 05/07/2011 16:41 - United States

Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had to take a crap" and didn't want to stink up his own bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 521

You deserved it 4 962

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Morning conversation

By Anonymous - 15/03/2021 08:01

Today, I went into the bathroom only to discover my dad on the pot. “Oh, sorry”, I say and turn to leave. His reply, “Oh I don’t mind. Just having a shit here.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 697

You deserved it 197

By fugachumi - 07/08/2011 08:08 - United States

Today, I discovered that every morning at around 3:00 my dad takes a monumental dump in my bathroom. When I confronted him about it he denied it. He still does it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 838

You deserved it 3 514

Let that sink in

By vegasman20002 - 18/05/2024 06:00 - United States - Garden City

Today, my father-in-law shat himself in my bathroom and tried to flush some of the evidence down my sink. Sink that I'd just cleaned up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 445

You deserved it 62

By mikey51 - 10/03/2012 01:56 - Australia

Today, I was taking a dump, when my dad shouted for me to go wash the dishes. Fed up with his constant shit, I told him to bite me. He took this as an invitation to wedge the bathroom door shut for nearly two hours, despite all my pleas and apologies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 632

You deserved it 41 589

Never going to live this down

By Anonymous - 01/09/2023 10:00 - United States - Warren

Today, I went up to take a shower. I typically go to the bathroom first, I take a mega dump, then flush the toilet. Not only wouldn't the toilet flush but I found out my parents only keep one plunger on hand. It was in the downstairs bathroom. My dad came upstairs and plunged the toilet while I stood there naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 500

You deserved it 280

By Anonymous - 11/11/2014 18:56 - United States - Dekalb

Today, I walked into my bathroom, only to find my dad passed out on the floor with his pants around his ankles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 095

You deserved it 3 061

By Anonymous - 02/06/2011 14:10 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad came to visit me. By visit I mean he arrived, took a huge smelly dump and left. This is the first time I've seen my dad in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 008

You deserved it 3 075

By obtuse_ballsack - 04/06/2012 20:37 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 717

You deserved it 2 759

By whatchagonnado - 24/03/2013 07:35 - Canada - Victoria

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, I needed to use the bathroom. I decided to be a good girlfriend and leave the seat up for him. He later yelled at me for not putting the seat down because he needed to take a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 953

You deserved it 8 897

By EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - 17/08/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 296

You deserved it 7 527

Next

Top comments

cessily 8

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:11

I happen to be taking a crap right now

captainbj2 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 22:13

who pays for the bathroom? I think it is HIS bathroom....

Comments

TheNamesSamara 0

Wednesday 6 July 2011 17:16

my dad does this all the time

kmh31098 0

Wednesday 6 July 2011 17:28

tell him to stay away from the spicy food next time!!!!

andreafml2011 0

Wednesday 6 July 2011 17:45

my dad does the same (; but heyy at least i dont pay bills. :)

ccoyne360 2

Wednesday 6 July 2011 18:40

I'm taking a crap right now too!

XxEmoSnowboarder 8

Wednesday 6 July 2011 21:23

Congratulations?

peachypinnaple 0

Wednesday 6 July 2011 19:32

happens to me all the time

jayemdoubleyou 1

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:20

I hate to break it to you but all if the bathrooms are his bathroom. It's his house and he let's you live there.

mikaylaraymond 0

Wednesday 6 July 2011 20:26

why qould you post something silly like this?

jallred254 4

Wednesday 6 July 2011 21:14

umm it's fml. and fyi you dumb as shit

5t3ff1k4h 44

Thursday 7 July 2011 6:09

Says the one who says 'you' instead of 'you're' and doesn't capitalize.

jallred254 4

Thursday 7 July 2011 17:34

honest mistake but on the other hand no1 wuz talking to you and no gives a ****

5t3ff1k4h 44

Friday 8 July 2011 19:23

I don't particularly care if no one was talking to me. It's FML; people can comment wherever they please so long as the comment is appropriate. No one cares? Tell that to the many Grammar Nazis of this site.

jallred254 4

Friday 8 July 2011 20:01

I have to admit that that one was funny lol

jallred254 4

Wednesday 6 July 2011 21:06

sucks to not have your own house right? you could shit in some other persons bathroom. your dad pays for that house. shut the **** up.

blanccamaro74 6

Wednesday 6 July 2011 22:52

it's his house he can shit wherever he wants for as long as he wants

Mrfuzzypenguin11 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 3:11

What the freak this post was on here a month ago

8
9
10
11
12
13
14

Keywords

Love Party Awkward Lonely ADHD Transportation Cars Ironic Vacation Work Mental health Miscellaneous Grandparents Accident Health Covid Kids Annoying Shopping Cute Coworkers Animals Dogs Photography Art Videos Exhausted Intimacy Sex Money

The Top

Today, I ran into my ex at the mall. He’s married, with a 2 year-old. Three years ago he ended our 6-year relationship because he said he didn’t believe in marriage and kids. Sorry for not being good enough to achieve those things with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 125

You deserved it 223

Today, I finally met my dream woman: a smokin’ hot green-eyed petite redhead. Or so I thought. I met her online and “she” turned out to be a 22 year-old guy trolling me. The worst part is that I separated from my wife for this girl. She won’t take me back no matter how much I beg and plead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 127

You deserved it 4 081

The Top

Today, I was on a red-eye flight, and the woman beside me was chattering loudly to her friend. I opened my laptop and got to work. Suddenly, one of the women turned to me and told me that the clicking of my keyboard was too loud. She then called me an "inconsiderate, selfish bitch." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 030

You deserved it 2 443

Today, I went to my boss’s office to ask him a question. He basically gave me a cold look and replied, “You just answered your own question.” Due to my pregnancy hormones, it took all the strength I had to not burst into tears right there and then. I went back to my desk and let it all out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 900

You deserved it 231

Today, after an extremely hard day at work, I took a hot shower to wind down a little bit. I accidentally splashed a painful amount of hot water and shampoo in my eyes. My left contact is now stuck to my eyeball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 195

You deserved it 8 971

Today, I interviewed for my dream job. Everything was going great until the interviewer asked, "So, what's your least favorite race?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 560

You deserved it 330

Today, I was at home and my boyfriend called me and said that I'd left my G-string at his house. I only have one G-string and I was wearing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 054

You deserved it 2 766

Today, my teacher started talking about me quietly to the stuffed cat, called Rufus, that she keeps on her desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 451

You deserved it 2 486