Miscellaneous: Today, I found out that my new roommate got kicked out of his...

By Charles Pennington - 22/11/2011 11:36 - United States

Today, I found out that my new roommate got kicked out of his old house because he pulled a gun on his old roommates and threatened them. The reason? They nagged him about dishes he left in the sink. Well, only 10 months left on the lease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 875

You deserved it 3 372

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Give it back

By upset room mate - 18/08/2011 06:59 - United States

Today, after our old roommate left because he was too dirty for us to live with anymore, we found out that our new roommate has "borrowed" our shampoo, towel, toilet paper, liquor, without replacing them. I wish we still only had to clean up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 139

You deserved it 4 305

By Adrian James - 09/07/2019 12:00

Today, I got into a fight with my roommate's girlfriend's best friend. A few hours later, they had me evicted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 726

You deserved it 256

By homeless - 26/03/2014 23:45 - United Kingdom - Winchester

Today, I found out that, after having moved over 500 miles to begin a post-graduate degree, I'm being kicked out of the house I'm renting. We haven't yet signed agreements. Apparently I "keep the kitchen too clean". FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 456

You deserved it 3 653

By NowHomeless - 31/08/2010 23:13 - United States

Today, my roommate woke me up during afternoon nap to tell me that I need to move out. His reason: "Our political differences will likely escalate to violence." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 811

You deserved it 3 294

By screwedhousemate - 28/03/2011 11:52 - United Kingdom

Today, my three housemates got into a huge fight and ended up declaring their undying hatred for each other. They now refuse to talk to each other, and I've become their go-between. Yesterday, we signed the lease for another year in the house together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 921

You deserved it 4 283

By Anonymous - 02/03/2011 11:20 - United States

Today, my roommate came home and instantly began raging, cursing, and threatening to kill me. While I was cowering in my bedroom, the police had to settle the situation. All I'd done was rearrange some furniture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 583

You deserved it 6 348

Our house

By Anonymous - 11/05/2014 19:22 - United States

Today, I moved into my new house. The previous occupants failed to tell me that they'd recently kicked out their crazy crackhead son, who seems to think they've paid me to pretend that they've moved out and that I'm the new owner. He wants back in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 301

You deserved it 3 595

Lazy prick

By FMC fuck my credit! - 12/06/2022 10:00

Today, my now ex-boyfriend got us evicted. The lazy prick kept throwing dog poop onto the neighbors' patio instead of disposing it properly. Management told him he could either get rid of the dog or we had to go. My ex refused and slammed the door in his face. The lease is in my name, so my credit is fucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 974

You deserved it 250

Insane rules

By Anonymous - 24/04/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, one of my roommates blew a fuse by running a personal heater on full overnight. I notified our landlady that I had to get a new fuse; she came over to pay me for it. Only as I heard landlady's horn did I see another roommate's girlfriend's car; she stayed overnight and isn't allowed to. Both roomies got evicted and blamed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 114

Worst roommate ever

By Anonymous - 29/01/2023 08:00 - Ireland

Today I knocked on one of my roommate's door and asked her to stop vacuuming since it's was late. She started to record me and went on a tirade about how none of the girls there respect her. She has previously tried to push two girls down the stairs. Her lease isn't up for 4 more months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 850

You deserved it 109

weepingangel_fml 7

Tuesday 22 November 2011 15:54

They didn't call the cops on him?

J3R3MYY 14

Tuesday 22 November 2011 15:57

**** the lease, gtf outa there!!

Comments

kaycee1996 5

Monday 2 April 2012 16:02

Good luck : )

merrielp 13

Monday 11 June 2012 2:10

Background check BEFORE!!!!!

Mat2000_1 4

Saturday 5 April 2014 12:18

I guess that you're doing the dishes. Good luck!

Keywords

Toxic Family Miscellaneous Food Love Health Valentine's Day Gross Homeowners Home improvement Babysitter Kids Awkward Drugs Music Crush Lonely Relatable Wanker Intimacy Animals Cats Coworkers Work Embarrassing Sleep Transportation Airplanes Mental health Cute

The Top

Today, I was hugging my girlfriend after she had a really bad day at work, when she burst into tears and started sobbing. For some reason that I'll never understand, it gave me a hard-on. She felt it, and now she thinks I'm a sick bastard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 213

You deserved it 7 320

Today, my step-dad was talking about how he was raised in Las Vegas, telling stories about him and his buddies, until he stopped, looked right at my mom and said, "Find her, feed her, f*ck her, forget her. But I never forgot your mom, that's how I stole her from your dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 464

You deserved it 4 174

The Top

Today, I was at the library. I went near the computer section when I saw this man cursing and pounding his fists on a computer. He left. I thought I'd check it out. As I sat down, a librarian came over with the security guard and pointed at me. I'm now being fined for destroying public property. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 922

You deserved it 15 679

Today, I was watching TV when a Toy Story 3 commercial came on. My Mom said, "Oh, I remember when I took you to see Toy Story. Now Andy's all grown up and so are you. The only difference is Andy is going to college and you're not." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 215

You deserved it 46 102

Today, on my way out of the subway station, I noticed an older woman standing at the bottom of a flight of stairs with a large cart. I went up to her and asked if she needed help getting it up the stairs. She looks me up and down and says, "No, not from you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 078

You deserved it 4 262

Today, a guy on Bumble sent me a dick pic to me. I opened it, stared at it for a good few minutes, and replied, “I don’t see anything unusual. What are your complaints?” And then it hit me: It’s what they call “the life of a medical student.” I’m ruined! FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 167

You deserved it 311

Today, I came back to my dorm to find my roommate forgot to get rid of her massive amounts of cheese before break. She did, however, remember to unplug the refrigerator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 713

You deserved it 2 116

Today, it's official, we measured. My boyfriend's manboobs are bigger than my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 298

You deserved it 11 207