Transportation: Today, I got a phone call from a detective in response to my...

By Blondie - 23/03/2009 20:37 - United States

Today, I got a phone call from a detective in response to my stolen car that has been missing since St. Patrick's Day. He told me that he had found my car, but was chuckling the whole time. Turns out, I had parked my car in a different lot. I haven't had it for a week. It was never stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 248

You deserved it 92 833

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Same thing different taste

By SenescentSouthernBoy - 17/08/2009 08:42 - United States

Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out to find the car stolen. I called the cops, and the responding officer took the info and drove me home to give the roomie the bad news in person. 15 minutes later, they found the car. I'd parked it on the opposite side of the lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 482

You deserved it 60 802

Women be shopping

By Krule - 04/08/2024 00:00 - United States - Redding

Today, I couldn't find my car in a mall parking lot. After 30 minutes of searching, I reported it stolen to the mall security. It turns out that I'd parked it on the opposite side of the mall. Security escorted me to my car, all while giving me pitiful looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 504

By Melinie - 24/06/2012 03:23 - United States

Today, I found an empty parking space in a crowded parking lot. When I came back later, a lady and a cop were standing by my car. Her car used to be parked there and got stolen. They think I'm involved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 643

You deserved it 1 905

Busted

By bustedfornuthin - 08/09/2010 04:42 - United States

Today, I was arrested by the police for sitting in what they thought was a stolen vehicle. After being slammed into the back of a squad car at gunpoint, they realized the car was actually recovered a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 910

You deserved it 2 498

Classic case of the Mondays

By Anonymous - 06/05/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, I took the bus after work. When I got to the remote parking lot, I realized my car had been stolen so I called the police to report it. When they came to take a statement and asked me when was the last time I saw my car was, I replied, “This morning, when I drove it to wo… Oh.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 176

You deserved it 583

By truth - 10/02/2012 01:49 - United States

Today, my boss reported to the police that a suspicious car has been parked outside the store late at night. I walked outside and my car was gone. He had my car towed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 317

You deserved it 2 191

Busted

By Anonymous - 20/12/2009 03:08 - United States

Today, I was approached by a policeman who asked me if I was the owner of the green Camry. Turns out my parents decided to teach me a lesson for lying where I had been by reporting the car stolen. They also wouldn't answer my one phone call. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 019

You deserved it 9 099

By uppiskalle - 12/09/2014 14:32 - United States - Riverside

Today, my car was stolen from my driveway. I reported it to the police, the insurance company, and my neighbors, and begged for help via social media. As I walked to catch a bus, I saw my car parked outside my school. I forgot I left it there last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 571

You deserved it 45 727

By dgilbs - 27/08/2012 14:50 - United States - Cheboygan

Today, I finished my shopping at Costco, and realized I had forgotten where I had parked. After scouring the parking lot for 20 minutes, I called the police and filed a report for a stolen vehicle. I then remembered I had bought a new car yesterday and parked it right next to the entrance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 024

You deserved it 37 918

By Anonymous - 03/06/2016 19:46 - United States

Today, the police finally recovered my stolen car. All it took was a shootout and two people dying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 666

You deserved it 1 949

zachary918 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 1:59

Well, on the plus side you still have a car :)

fourwheelsoffury 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 2:00

Sounds like someone drank too much on St Patty's hahaha

Comments

Deuce600 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 4:02

"Dude! Wheres my car??"

mydadpulledout 17

Saturday 27 October 2012 20:20

I was thinking the exact same thing!

underscore_ 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 4:10

so you went to the bar real drunk and forgot where you parked

lyssa121693 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 4:30

someones a dumbass drunk.

Hgm09 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 4:31

Haha. I doubt you were in any condition to drive, though. It's probably for the best.

dcapp 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 4:39

someone was traaashheeeddd!

realhorrorshow88 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 4:47

Hehehe I like FMLs with a happy ending once in a while. Detective must've thought u were such a retard.

goodtimesx2 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 5:02

thats really sad. nice job captain crunch, you win the big idiot of the day award. Your lucky they found the car

krunkrooster 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 5:03

I am sure it was leprechauns, and had nothing to do with alcohol. That's what you get for stealing gold from short irish dudes. DESERVED!!!!

sor_machine 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 5:16

wow. well atleast your car is ok :D

des1988 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 5:20

blackout

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird Dating AITA Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Fight

The Top

Today, there was a long queue at the store, and behind me were two senior citizens. I wanted to do a good deed, so I said, "Cut before me in line, I have all the time in the world." My reward? The old man scolded me because I supposedly insinuated that they were old, and only had a short time left to live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 423

You deserved it 13 444

Today, an absolute cretin of a lorry driver ran into the back of me as I was slowing down for an orange light about to go red. My car is totalled and he had the nerve to tell the police I had brake checked him on purpose, probably for an insurance scam, and that it was all my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 472

You deserved it 63

The Top

Today, my girlfriend changed her relationship status on Facebook to 'It's Complicated' because I didn't give her my last cookie. This happens all the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 285

You deserved it 12 483

Today, my dad asked me if I'd started smoking, I gave him a big speech about how I never have and never will. Two hours later, he found my stash of cigarettes under my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 983

You deserved it 136 266

Today, I had a stomach bug, but despite it I swallowed a mouthful of habanero sauce on a dare. I ended up projectile vomiting on a wall outside, lost my sense of balance and fell over on the sidewalk, almost blacked out from the tightness in my chest, and had to refuse an ambulance that somebody had called. All for $5. FML

I agree, your life sucks 132

You deserved it 1 277

Today, I became the senior receptionist at my job, which is supposed to have three receptionists. The others all had life changes, so they're moving on, which is fair, but now I have to train new people. I've been here three weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 026

You deserved it 106

Today, I found out that while I was attending AA meetings to help understand how to help my boyfriend of 7 years when he got back from rehab, that he was not in rehab at all. He was on vacation. With his wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 606

You deserved it 177

Today, my wax appointment cancelled on me, we’re supposed to be going to Hawaii in the morning and now I can’t wear a bikini because my stomach and back are hairier than my husband's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 483

You deserved it 474

Same thing different taste

Women be shopping

Busted

Classic case of the Mondays

Busted

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