Love: Today, I got my first kiss. He had an allergic reaction to my... - FML

By Anonymous - 20/03/2011 03:30 - United States

Today, I got my first kiss. He had an allergic reaction to my chapstick, and broke out in hives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 032

You deserved it 5 098

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Rash beard

By Rashbeard - 05/01/2020 01:00

Today, I was eating out with my partner, and we decided to use the new lube we bought. Things went great until I later realized I was allergic to it and a large red rash spread all across my mouth and chin. It won't go away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 812

You deserved it 441

By UnhappyLips - 16/12/2016 09:43

Today, the lip balms I ordered online finally arrived in the mail. After trying one out, my lips had an allergic reaction. It's a 4-pack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 851

You deserved it 1 044

By Anonymous - 08/03/2010 14:35 - United States

Today, I have a rash all over my face because yesterday my boyfriend broke up with me. Apparently, I am allergic to the something in the tissues with which I was blowing my nose and wiping away my tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 660

You deserved it 3 007

By drpepperking10 - 02/07/2016 23:27 - United States

Today, I was kissing my crush for the first time and her tooth fell out into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 360

You deserved it 3 264

Chapped out

By Anonymous - 12/12/2009 09:28 - United States

Today, I was having lunch with my mom before an important job interview. She commented than my lips looked dry and crackly and gave me her chapstick with aloe to put on. Apparently I'm allergic to aloe and my lips got so swollen I could hardly talk. It was too late to reschedule the interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 087

You deserved it 2 522

By goo - 10/02/2017 18:00 - United States - Louisville

Today, while having fun between the sheets with my boyfriend, his allergies got the best of him and his nose started running. Every time he kissed me he'd drip snot onto my face. When I complained, he said I was being insensitive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 666

You deserved it 1 129

Bad, so bad

By Anonymous - 14/11/2015 07:20 - United States

Today, the man of my dreams turned out to be the worst kisser I've ever encountered. I now have a huge hickey on my chin to remember the experience by. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 915

You deserved it 2 344

By PissyPants - 20/06/2010 05:12 - United States

Today, I finally got my first kiss. I was so excited, I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 226

You deserved it 29 356

By jacobscrackers - 01/08/2010 18:06 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend decided that a good time to have our first kiss was on a roller-coaster, right before a huge drop. He bit through my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 916

You deserved it 5 884

By rhunter17 - 06/04/2015 19:38

Today, I forgot my boyfriend was allergic to nuts and ate Nutella toast before he arrived. He had just brought me flowers for doing well in an exam and I kissed him. He had a reaction and I had to stab him in the leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 846

You deserved it 10 587

Next

Top comments

MzMegs 20

Sunday 20 March 2011 7:39

Ouch. :( Poor guy.

trickkemhard 0

Sunday 20 March 2011 7:46

yuuummmm, sounds like he got a TASTY treat. bet it tasted like honey..from the hive. *ba-dum-ching*

Comments

Tayeable45 0

Sunday 20 March 2011 19:31

At least it will be a kiss he'll never foget!

MissMittens 0

Sunday 20 March 2011 20:09

are you sure it was an allergic reaction? it could of been him catching your herpes ...

mb1616 0

Sunday 20 March 2011 21:26

damn that sucks. aha

allyrox123 0

Sunday 20 March 2011 22:31

how is that FML??? it is more like FhisL!!!

KickItHigh 32

Monday 21 March 2011 3:52

Try vasaline next time. I'm pretty sure no one is really allergic to that.

lilmissprissNkc 0

Monday 21 March 2011 6:39

FYL cuz he's that big of a nerd to have a chapstick allergy and u wanted to kiss him... More like FHL cuz he probably looks like a pepperoni pizza right now...

pimpinpimp 2

Monday 21 March 2011 10:12

Fyl? shouldn't it be fhl?

Brendan3693 0

Tuesday 22 March 2011 2:52

no first kiss for me. :(

ilovegirlz69 0

Tuesday 22 March 2011 8:19

you sure it was his chapstick?

ZzjayrodzZ 3

Tuesday 22 March 2011 23:04

well congrats :) but find a new chapstick haha

3
4
5
6
7
8

Keywords

Kids Money Health Work Christmas You're fired Fat Bodyshaming Customers Am I overreacting? Social Media Love Facebook AITA Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Miscellaneous Education Students Relatable Technology Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends

The Top

Today, I let my 4-month old puppy sleep with me. She’s been constipated for a while. I woke up to a foul odor in the middle of the night. Turns out she took a massive dump on the bed right by my head. I had to completely strip my bed to go back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 789

You deserved it 473

Today, my company told me that they refuse to buy me new safety footwear without a doctor's note, because my shoe size is three sizes smaller than the minimum size my company provides. I actually have to get my doctor to prove my shoe size. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 527

You deserved it 1 300

The Top

Today, I found out the hard way, that yes, a condom can break. Also, that sometimes when it does, your boyfriend won't say anything until you start having morning sickness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 688

You deserved it 397

Today, my smartwatch decided I needed a "stress level" alert during a perfectly calm meeting. It vibrated aggressively, and my boss suggested I take up yoga. FML

I agree, your life sucks 393

You deserved it 150

Today, I was talking to myself and got distracted when I was going to put chapstick on my lips. I took the cap off my deodorant and put it on my lips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 825

You deserved it 1 410

Today, my mom was feeling down, so I decided to buy her a gift. Knowing she likes lighthouses, I bought her a tiny one that plugs in and lights up. I brought it home, plugged it in, and when she saw me with it, she said, "Wipe that smirk off your face and get that junk out of here." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 246

You deserved it 2 044

Today, and for the past week, my dog has started barking at my door when I start masturbating. I think my mom is starting to suspect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 616

You deserved it 11 277

Today, I decided to play a friendly game of Clue with my family. This resulted in one kid crying, one dad with a broken nose, two broken plates and a trip to Walmart to get a new Clue game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 346

You deserved it 4 133