Miscellaneous: Today, I got so drunk that I decided it was a good idea to get...

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By AmberHavoc - 02/01/2013 15:01 - United Kingdom

Today, I got so drunk that I decided it was a good idea to get naked and jump on a trampoline in the back of a neighbour’s garden. Said neighbour is a police officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 001

You deserved it 46 818

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Same thing different taste

STOP!

By Sammmmi - 22/06/2016 18:35 - United Kingdom - Paisley

Today, I heard someone try to get into my back garden. I ran to the front door, opened it, and shouted at whoever it was. I then saw a police officer appear, following the person who'd jumped my fence. I then realised I wasn't wearing any trousers. I'd shouted at the police half naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 713

You deserved it 1 892

By vanorav - 18/03/2012 02:41 - United States - Santa Clarita

Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 583

You deserved it 2 252

You played yourself

By anon - 25/03/2013 18:31 - United States

Today, I got so drunk that I tasered myself in the balls as a joke, fell down my friend's porch stairs and rolled out into the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 120

You deserved it 68 687

By FailedEngineer - 20/10/2009 21:31 - Australia

Today, I lost my house keys while staggering home drunk, so I decided to climb through an opened window and promptly went to bed. Twenty minutes later the police wake me up while attempting to search my place. The neighbors thought I was a burglar and called the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 275

You deserved it 35 670

Busted!

By angela - 09/04/2020 23:00

Today, I went to a party. Although I wasn't drinking, I was still afraid the cops would bust me. Halfway through the party, the cops showed up. I tried to hop a fence, ripping my pants and cutting my leg in the meantime. It wasn't until was on the ground that I found out there was a gate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 469

You deserved it 2 119

Party hard

By Jason the flasher - 15/09/2018 22:00

Today, I went to a party that my friends were throwing. I had a great time and got blackout drunk. I woke up to videos from my girlfriend from last night. At some point I'd managed to take off my shorts and boxers and spent the rest of the party naked from the waist down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 404

You deserved it 3 278

By meeeoow - 22/01/2011 10:05 - Australia

Today, my drunken father decided to walk my quiet street naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 675

You deserved it 2 778

By babyeaternomnom - 30/06/2012 16:22 - Canada - Brampton

Today, I caught my elderly neighbour skinny-dipping in my pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 898

You deserved it 2 327

Check this out

By Anonymous - 30/09/2018 12:00

Today, I had to run to put the trash out for the garbage truck, only I was so hungover, I forgot I was only wearing an open dressing gown and no underwear. A few neighbours and passing cars got to see me swinging in the breeze. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 342

You deserved it 2 733

Let em in

By Anonymous - 29/07/2022 10:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, my neighbour called to say a crazy drunk man was breaking into my house. Thankfully, the police were already there, questioning me about “attempted unlawful entry” into my own house. My keys had been taken from a friend so I wouldn’t drive. It's 1°C and I still haven’t gotten inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 815

You deserved it 241

EverestMelting 23

Wednesday 2 January 2013 18:55

Haha you deserved that one. Maybe you should stop getting wasted? There's a thought.

ripresno 10

Wednesday 2 January 2013 18:57

This is why alcohol is bad, kids

Comments

RareOlive 4

Wednesday 2 January 2013 19:14

No way I could live next to a police officer

Enslaved 36

Wednesday 2 January 2013 19:48

My neighbour is a police officer. He's cool as hell and tells the craziest stories. Also he has helped me and even my friends get out of tickets by calling his coworker and asking them to give us a break right-- as we're getting pulled over.

mbuck87 19

Wednesday 2 January 2013 22:41

How does he know you're being pulled over?

Enslaved 36

Wednesday 2 January 2013 22:55

I call my cop neighbour right on the spot. Where I live, it's not against the law to talk and drive at the same time. (I don't do it though) He'll ask me who the cop is and he'll call or radio him directly. Btw I'm a safe driver so it doesn't happen often. I wasn't expecting my new car's tail light to go out.

maz95 17

Wednesday 2 January 2013 19:16

Well maybe having him as a neighbour will get you thinking twice next time before getting so wasted.

ArchaeologyDude1 5

Wednesday 2 January 2013 19:19

Dumbass

kingsian 15

Wednesday 2 January 2013 19:34

NO! it's not ever a "good" idea to jump anywhere naked!

poccocurantes 7

Wednesday 2 January 2013 20:26

You're no fun.

The_F3rris 11

Wednesday 2 January 2013 22:19

Pogo sticks + naked = the best.

BubbleGrunge 18

Wednesday 2 January 2013 19:34

Well, being that he's your neighbor, he should have at least tried to get your drunk ass home without causing you legal trouble! Of course, naked humans on a trampoline might make for a good arrest story to the squad and is a very legitimate and understandable arrest!

Enslaved 36

Wednesday 2 January 2013 19:43

I had a trampoline once. I had to take it down because it was a magnet to the kids in the neighbourhood. I'd come home from work to find 10 stranger's kids jumping on it. If any of them got hurt, I knew I'd end up in a lawsuit.

_wraith 15

Wednesday 2 January 2013 20:19

It's a by-law where I live to have trampolines and pools locked up so kids can't sneak in at night and hurt/kill themselves, so we never really had that problem. Although I would be lying if I didn't say I played on it a few times while drinking... *ahem*

Enslaved 36

Wednesday 2 January 2013 21:48

I have an 8foot privacy wooden fence with locks on my gates. They would all scale the fence using the nearby tree branches. :P It was fun watching them scatter when I showed up. And I agree-- jump on the trampoline with a buzz with more fun than I care to admit . Lol

DanielleinDC 33

Wednesday 2 January 2013 19:44

Getting drunk is never a good idea in the first place. And if you have a crazy idea while you are drunk, try to have some sober friends around to stop you from going through with whatever craziness you're considering. YDI.

doodlecloud 26

Wednesday 2 January 2013 21:53

Woah...nothing wrong with getting a little drunk. I hate drunk idiots more than most but even I get happy drunk...I just don't get stupid drunk.

zombieslayer83 19

Wednesday 2 January 2013 19:50

You were drunk, have some fun. It's not like you hopped in the car and drove somewhere. You live once, and naked trampoline jumping is already crossed off my bucket list.