Kids: Today, I got to see my son's dream of being on television come... - FML

By fuck - 02/06/2011 18:43 - United States

Today, I got to see my son's dream of being on television come true. Unfortunately, it was because he'd been arrested for trying to rob a bank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 115

You deserved it 5 954

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Same thing different taste

In on it

By u raised him - 10/02/2018 01:30

Today, my 17-year-old son attempted to rob the bank I work at while I was off shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 411

You deserved it 587

By Sarah - 12/06/2011 00:54 - United States

Today, I saw my brother on TV after 3 years of no contact. He was being arrested on Cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 164

You deserved it 4 043

By ghostyyy - 24/07/2010 23:21 - France

Today, my sister was on television. It would have been great if she weren't being handcuffed for burglary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 964

You deserved it 3 290

By iliketoastalot - 09/08/2011 17:38 - United States

Today, my boyfriend got arrested. For robbing my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 645

You deserved it 5 909

Wingnut

By Anonymous - 29/06/2022 06:00

Today, my son actually tried to get out of being arrested by claiming he was “an agent” and unless they let him go, his employers “from the government” would come looking for him and there would be “consequences”. The officers eventually got their breath back from laughing at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 059

You deserved it 193

Dumbass

By Anonymous - 21/11/2022 04:00

Today, my son is an idiot, but I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt by giving him a job as a cashier in one of my stores. Within half an hour, I was sent security footage from that store's manager showing my son on his phone, ignoring customers, picking his nose, and stealing money from the till. FML

I agree, your life sucks 983

You deserved it 438

By great - 20/07/2012 10:20 - New Zealand - Hamilton

Today, at the bank, my 8-year-old son decided to pull out realistic looking toy gun, and scream "FREEZE! Give me all your money!" The dim-witted bank teller pressed the silent alarm, and I was nearly arrested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 540

You deserved it 31 411

By Anonymous - 16/06/2012 00:00 - United States - Medina

Today, my son paid the price for emulating his idols, aka the sub-human scum on Jersey Shore. He called me from jail and actually had the balls to try to guilt me into bailing him out, after he'd been arrested for punching his girlfriend at a liquor store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 579

You deserved it 4 705

Parenting in 2021

By Anonymous - 17/03/2021 19:30 - United States

Today, I found out my son's dad stole his unemployment card and took the money. My son was homeless at the time and using his dad's address for mail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 116

You deserved it 114

By female - 31/12/2018 20:00

Today, my nineteen-year-old son attempted to mug me. With a screwdriver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 909

You deserved it 370

Next

Top comments

hunterhound 0

Friday 3 June 2011 1:59

great achievement

FreebirdIII 1

Friday 3 June 2011 2:00

Did he get his entire 15 minutes?

Comments

ShakeMeDown 12

Friday 3 June 2011 4:03

how much he get before he was caught?

OCDC 9

Friday 3 June 2011 4:19

Doesn't matter, he obviously doesn't have it now.

ShakeMeDown 12

Friday 3 June 2011 4:08

someone never got an allowance as a kid

parxxx 0

Friday 3 June 2011 6:54

I didn't an allowance . . . oh sh*t

ironwords 8

Friday 3 June 2011 4:10

boners your back!

just_a_dude_ 0

Friday 3 June 2011 4:13

I always put robbers and druggies low on the naughty list. I mean, we've all stolen or smoked a lil weed right? it's those rapists and murderers I don't like. Not saying stealing and doing drugs is okay just... you know what nevermind.

antolenice_fml 1

Friday 3 June 2011 4:26

No I didn't.

OCDC 9

Friday 3 June 2011 4:15

Boners your front! Everywhere is unprotected!

RockstarRN 10

Friday 3 June 2011 4:27

Desperate times call for desperate measures :(

griffindragon97 3

Friday 3 June 2011 4:40

ur hot

cassywaffles 0

Friday 3 June 2011 4:32

ha!

xenno92 3

Friday 3 June 2011 4:32

on a positive note, unlike most people he achieved his dream on always wanting to be on tv

Ryanmatuszak 5

Friday 3 June 2011 4:41

at least you can say something positive

hellogorgeous96 0

Friday 3 June 2011 4:52

that my friend, has proven that your child has SOME sort of talent in life. he can get caught by the cops quicker than anybody else.

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Keywords

Awkward Lonely Love Party Transportation Cars ADHD Work Mental health Ironic Vacation Accident Miscellaneous Grandparents Kids Annoying Covid Health Cute Shopping Coworkers Dogs Animals Videos Photography Art Sex Intimacy Exhausted Money

The Top

Today, I followed my daughter and found out she wasn’t with friends, she was on a date. I confronted her about the lie, but she takes after her mother, a lawyer, and steamrollered over me about invading her privacy, so even though she lied, she somehow has the moral high ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 566

You deserved it 2 708

Today, there was a pretty girl sitting near me on the train home. I thought about asking for her number., but instead a drunk nitwit decided to wander around the car and came very close to touching her. She got up and moved to the other end, while I had to deal with a belligerent hobo who was now intent on fighting me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 858

You deserved it 184

The Top

Today, my boss came up to my desk to talk about a new project. He came up to my monitor so we can go to a website. My browser had frozen and I couldn't close it. The tabs I had open: Facebook, Gmail, Careerbuilder, Monster, and Resume Samples. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 100

You deserved it 69 227

Today, the guy I’ve been seeing for a couple of months and started falling for told me his ex-girlfriend is pregnant with his child. I’m so bummed because kids and baby mamas are my number one deal-breaker. I really liked him too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 126

Today, my house got broken into. My brand new laptop was stolen, along with my flatscreen TV, digital camera, external hard drive and some clothes. Wanting to drown my sorrows in the Ben and Jerry's Phish Food ice cream in the freezer, I opened the door to find that it too had been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 30

Today, I was walking home from work, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. I clambered back to my feet, made it three feet, then slipped and fell again. A guy who'd witnessed the whole thing stuck his head out of his car window and yelled "Dumbasssssss!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 313

You deserved it 6 197

Today, I was driving down a one-way street, when some raging dumbass came screaming the wrong way down the road at me. My instant reaction was to brake and give the guy a chance to do the same. His instant reaction was to keep going and wreck my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 058

You deserved it 3 082

Today, I was at the airport trying to help a man get to the right terminal. When he finished he turned to tell me "Don't worry, your English is pretty good, considering you're not American". English is my only language. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 234

You deserved it 5 214