Miscellaneous: Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled...

By Anonymous - 19/07/2012 04:55 - United States - San Diego

Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 852

You deserved it 80 963

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Same thing different taste

By *facefloor* - 24/07/2012 20:08 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 073

You deserved it 5 417

All over the place

By nemi - 31/08/2010 22:33 - Norway

Today, I was out having a beer with a few friends. After getting a pint, I slipped in a puddle of beer, fell on top of a stranger on the sofa, and knocked my beer upside down on my head. Then, completely soaked, I realized I'd also knocked over the table, spilling its content on a poor girl across it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 673

You deserved it 8 844

Dude, chill out

By U... - 18/08/2023 22:00

Today, my friend got a text showing his girlfriend cheating on him. Sounds like his FML, but he was at my house. He then worked his way through a bottle of my whisky and went into a drunken rage. He threw my furniture through windows, punched holes in the wall, and smashed stuff until I had to call the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 699

You deserved it 113

By :/ - 20/02/2011 18:44 - Canada

Today, I had my buddies over for a few beers and, trying to be cool, I told my wife to get out of the living room and back in the kitchen. I felt smug, right up until she said, "Why? Your mom doesn't need to be turned over for another 20 minutes, dick." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 061

You deserved it 109 694

By ali - 03/07/2012 11:51 - United States - Livingston

Today, I was having an argument with my girlfriend in front of our friends. I didn't want her to spoil my good time, so I ignored her until she disappeared. She re-appeared thirty minutes later just to throw a punch that would make Muhammad Ali jealous. Our friends' reaction? They clapped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 319

You deserved it 46 689

By Inconnu - 18/06/2011 05:13 - France

Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that's what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 588

You deserved it 3 860

By Anonymous - 21/03/2011 06:20 - United Kingdom

Today, it was my friend's 18th birthday. She had invited us out drinking. I've never had alcohol before and was very excited. I got a call explaining that she had invited one too many and asked me not to come. People bragging on facebook about what a great time they were having didn't help either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 490

You deserved it 6 264

By TCRII - 19/01/2019 16:00

Today, my girlfriend came over, drank half a bottle of Jack Daniels and pissed in my sink. I broke up with her and went out with friends. I met a woman and brought her home to watch a movie. She drank a bottle of wine and puked on my couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 417

You deserved it 3 818

By Anonymous - 06/06/2013 16:32 - Senegal

Today, I threw a birthday party for my boyfriend. As a joke, my friend and I served him non-alcoholic beer to see how he'd react. After a while, he faked being drunk, using it as an excuse after I caught him making out with one of my so-called "friends". FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 697

You deserved it 11 759

You need to leave

By trash your own house!! - 09/09/2023 06:00

Today, my friend found out his girlfriend was cheating on him. He came to talk to me, and I was happy to help him through this tough time… until he drank a bottle of whiskey by himself. He flew into a drunken rage and started punching holes in the wall and throwing furniture. Now my house is wrecked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 797

You deserved it 105

gianthelper 1

Thursday 19 July 2012 12:20

Women-1 Sexist men-0

Rangant 7

Thursday 19 July 2012 12:21

I'm pretty sure almost everyone here is going to cheer her on aswell. Way to be a dick.

Comments

coolcocoxxx 12

Thursday 19 July 2012 19:07

The fact that you thought yelling at your girlfriend to get you beer would make you seem cool is an FML all on its own. YDI

PhishloverA 14

Thursday 19 July 2012 19:10

*cheers for OP's girlfriend* You are a douchebag and you deserve it 100%

linkinpark98 23

Thursday 19 July 2012 19:11

I have much respect for your girlfriend. In fact, you don't deserve to have a girlfriend if you're going to be a sexist prick.

spottyblanket 8

Thursday 19 July 2012 19:16

Women were not put on this planet to SERVE you. You obviosuly weren't raised right.

AmericanJedhead 10

Thursday 19 July 2012 19:21

YDI for thinking that your girlfriend is your bitch. Hope she dumped you.

LemonLolly 10

Thursday 19 July 2012 19:31

Asshole

Dcm210 19

Thursday 19 July 2012 19:37

be nicer next time.

fordman22 0

Thursday 19 July 2012 19:46

Hope she kicked you in der nutzzzz

Ecp42 3

Thursday 19 July 2012 19:48

That doesn't make you cool. It just makes you look like a total dick.

liftedyoda 5

Thursday 19 July 2012 20:24

How did you think that would make you cool? Just makes you look like a total dick

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I agree, your life sucks 689

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Same thing different taste

All over the place

Dude, chill out

You need to leave

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