Work: Today, I had my boss over for dinner. Knowing that I was angling...

FML for mobile
Free

By Anonymous - 31/08/2012 23:16 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I had my boss over for dinner. Knowing that I was angling for a promotion, my fifteen-year-old son spent the dinner uttering lines such as "What's the point of showering before bed?" and "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." My boss was not impressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 162

You deserved it 4 935

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Epic Boss Battle

By Anon - 04/01/2018 15:00

Today, hoping to seal the deal on a promotion, I had my boss over for dinner. My dad, who lives with me, started ranting about homosexuals burning in hell. My boss’s daughter is a lesbian. Now my dad’s nose is broken and I fear for my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 392

You deserved it 810

Zing!

By Anonymous - 10/05/2022 14:00

Today, I met my coworker's kids during a cookout. I joked to her eldest son that he was awfully short for a seventeen-year-old. He responded, "Well, you're awfully ugly for the town slut." Everyone laughed, including my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 2 126

By fired - 13/05/2014 14:29 - United States - Millis

Today, my boss fired me after chewing me out for the horrible date he had with my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 739

You deserved it 4 475

Reviews

By Anonymous - 14/07/2010 06:14 - United States

Today, I made brownies for my co-workers. My boss called me into his office, and I though he was going to compliment me on the baking. Instead, he talked about how his 5-year-old daughter can make brownies better than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 695

You deserved it 6 236

By Anonymous - 11/07/2015 06:13 - Australia

Today, my boss told me I wasn't getting the promotion I'd been angling for. I was so pissed off, I ranted to a coworker about it over lunch. Turns out my boss was just testing how I dealt with rejection before making his final decision. He overheard my rant and me calling him a Nazi bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 204

You deserved it 37 375

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk

By helen_ - 23/04/2009 15:51 - United States

Today, I had to go to my 10 year-old son's school to talk about my job being a chef. As I was almost finished, I asked the kids "What would you like to do when you grow up?" Without hesitation one kid replied with a straight face, "Anything but being a douchebag like you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 532

You deserved it 6 060

Nepo baby

By Anonymous - 19/05/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad got promoted and ended up as my boss. I thought I’d finally have a manager I get along with, who could maybe throw a few perks my way. Nope. Dad was very clear that he was going to be a complete bastard to me at work to make absolutely sure no one could accuse him of favouritism. FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 129

Look up here

By Cody - 06/07/2009 23:28 - United States

Today, during my shift at a restaurant, my boss's daughter came in. I couldn't help but notice that she was almost popping out of her low-cut top. After having a private chat with her, my boss took me aside and said, "My daughter's got eyes you know, not just a pair of tits". FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 940

You deserved it 53 796

Bad idea

By Anonymous - 28/02/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I brought my mom to my work’s annual party. She insisted on meeting my boss and introduced herself as my "very supportive, overly involved mother." To make it worse, she gave him a lecture about how I was “just too shy” to ask for a raise. My boss is now both confused and terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 232

Snarky

By great - 10/02/2012 21:33 - United States

Today, I sat in my boss's office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 572

You deserved it 75 284

Runninvegan 8

Saturday 1 September 2012 5:08

Your son needs to get his ass kicked pronto.

hopsinlove17 26

Saturday 1 September 2012 5:08

Hopefully your boss was able to tell your kid was being a douche...

Comments

HSOMGF 5

Saturday 1 September 2012 5:14

You realize this is a reflection of your parenting skills, right? YDI.

CCDNRGD81411 3

Saturday 1 September 2012 6:25

My mom cussed around me constantly when driving to school and i turned out polite and without the vulgarity. Your logic is flawed

BatemanFML 0

Saturday 1 September 2012 7:22

13- My mother and father were horrible parents. I was a little shit for a long time, yet my twin sister was, and still is, a ******* saint. How do you explain your logic?

blacktower 13

Saturday 1 September 2012 8:04

YDI you should of taught the kid some better manners. Shame on you.

curlyfry33 8

Saturday 1 September 2012 8:24

I agree a little with 13, children do learn how to act and how not to act from what there parents taught them but every kid is different and some just are really rebellious and like the other guy said the kid might have an extra douse of hormones or something and you can't control that so you can't really blame the parents.

kaymkaym98 0

Saturday 1 September 2012 15:59

Kids have a mind of there own. Nothing to do with that.

randomkayx3 11

Sunday 2 September 2012 9:28

Not true at all. My parents are both ignorant and childish. I can never talk to them seriously. I'm 15 and I'm already looking into colleges and I'm excited about it. I told them I wanted to go to San Francisco State and they laughed in my face. My older siblings and my younger sister have no respect for anything. I do. It's definitely NOT a reflection of your parents.

Blunt person 16

Sunday 2 December 2018 6:24

Should have, not should of.

harrison918 5

Saturday 1 September 2012 5:15

Control your son.

MyaaBayyBee 6

Saturday 1 September 2012 5:17

Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks is a song , but your son needs manners . Teach him .

MrsAlexander83 10

Saturday 1 September 2012 5:20

Did you pop him right in the mouth and tell him "hoes also keep their mouths shut!" Or better yet...take everything out of his room but his mattress and blanket and tell him that's what his life will be like if you lose your job!

kittenvks 11

Saturday 1 September 2012 7:18

I personally think you're getting luxurious with the mattress and blanket. He shouldn't have both.

loserboii 11

Saturday 1 September 2012 7:57

On the contrary hoes can't keep their mouths shut ;)

xpaulatanx 10

Saturday 1 September 2012 5:22

I highly advocate either disowning or beating the everloving **** out of your son. He should know better. YOU should do your goddamned job as a parent.

pokefan813 16

Saturday 1 September 2012 8:09

I couldn't agree more. P.S. : that "spanking promotes violence" bull is a myth. I was spanked many times in my childhood years and I never got into a fight. I grew up in Brooklyn. Fights left and right.

Commander223 9

Saturday 1 September 2012 22:11

It's the stuff like giving a kid a black eye for little things that can **** them up. You have to set your own boundaries with this kind of thing. I was always spanked as a kid when I was being a little shit and now I respect my elders, know good manners, etc. My sister was never spanked and now she is the biggest, selfish, bitter bitch in the world

Primmly 11

Saturday 1 September 2012 5:27

I never understood having your boss over for dinner. Keep your home life and work separate- next time take your boss out to a restaurant. :/ Your family should have no bearing on your eligibility for a promotion.