Work: Today, I had my boss over for dinner. Knowing that I was angling...

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By Anonymous - 31/08/2012 23:16 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I had my boss over for dinner. Knowing that I was angling for a promotion, my fifteen-year-old son spent the dinner uttering lines such as "What's the point of showering before bed?" and "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." My boss was not impressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 162

You deserved it 4 935

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

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Same thing different taste

Epic Boss Battle

By Anon - 04/01/2018 15:00

Today, hoping to seal the deal on a promotion, I had my boss over for dinner. My dad, who lives with me, started ranting about homosexuals burning in hell. My boss’s daughter is a lesbian. Now my dad’s nose is broken and I fear for my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 392

You deserved it 810

Zing!

By Anonymous - 10/05/2022 14:00

Today, I met my coworker's kids during a cookout. I joked to her eldest son that he was awfully short for a seventeen-year-old. He responded, "Well, you're awfully ugly for the town slut." Everyone laughed, including my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 2 126

By fired - 13/05/2014 14:29 - United States - Millis

Today, my boss fired me after chewing me out for the horrible date he had with my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 740

You deserved it 4 475

Reviews

By Anonymous - 14/07/2010 06:14 - United States

Today, I made brownies for my co-workers. My boss called me into his office, and I though he was going to compliment me on the baking. Instead, he talked about how his 5-year-old daughter can make brownies better than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 695

You deserved it 6 236

By Anonymous - 11/07/2015 06:13 - Australia

Today, my boss told me I wasn't getting the promotion I'd been angling for. I was so pissed off, I ranted to a coworker about it over lunch. Turns out my boss was just testing how I dealt with rejection before making his final decision. He overheard my rant and me calling him a Nazi bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 204

You deserved it 37 375

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk

By helen_ - 23/04/2009 15:51 - United States

Today, I had to go to my 10 year-old son's school to talk about my job being a chef. As I was almost finished, I asked the kids "What would you like to do when you grow up?" Without hesitation one kid replied with a straight face, "Anything but being a douchebag like you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 532

You deserved it 6 060

Nepo baby

By Anonymous - 19/05/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad got promoted and ended up as my boss. I thought I’d finally have a manager I get along with, who could maybe throw a few perks my way. Nope. Dad was very clear that he was going to be a complete bastard to me at work to make absolutely sure no one could accuse him of favouritism. FML

I agree, your life sucks 423

You deserved it 130

Look up here

By Cody - 06/07/2009 23:28 - United States

Today, during my shift at a restaurant, my boss's daughter came in. I couldn't help but notice that she was almost popping out of her low-cut top. After having a private chat with her, my boss took me aside and said, "My daughter's got eyes you know, not just a pair of tits". FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 940

You deserved it 53 797

Bad idea

By Anonymous - 28/02/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I brought my mom to my work’s annual party. She insisted on meeting my boss and introduced herself as my "very supportive, overly involved mother." To make it worse, she gave him a lecture about how I was “just too shy” to ask for a raise. My boss is now both confused and terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 232

Snarky

By great - 10/02/2012 21:33 - United States

Today, I sat in my boss's office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 572

You deserved it 75 284

Runninvegan 8

Saturday 1 September 2012 5:08

Your son needs to get his ass kicked pronto.

hopsinlove17 26

Saturday 1 September 2012 5:08

Hopefully your boss was able to tell your kid was being a douche...

Comments

crazy4uboi 6

Sunday 2 September 2012 2:49

You'd think that your boss would understand I mean you did say he was 15...

brandonwlker8618 1

Sunday 2 September 2012 3:18

Botches aint chit but hoes and tricks haha

SchwaggHall 9

Sunday 2 September 2012 5:01

Wow! Thats funny in a REALLY REALLY REALLY messed up way. FYL op...

poorjudgement 26

Sunday 2 September 2012 9:00

I'm sorry, but that honestly looks like parential failure. My nephew is 15 and he never would dare to try something like that. My second niece, too. All my siblings and myself had our ups and downs, some really bad situations, too. But when we had been requested to behave it was damn sure we'd behave.

canzonetta 16

Sunday 2 September 2012 12:33

You know what is as funny and witty as keeping your parents from getting a promotion? Not getting anything for christmas!!

Jirekianu2 19

Sunday 2 September 2012 17:01

Welp, guess who just volunteered to make up that raise in pay? Your son! No birthday or christmas gifts or anything. For the next year should make it clear.

ellytoad 13

Sunday 2 September 2012 17:12

You let him stay? My mom would have saved face by sending me straight to my room the minute I started making her look bad like that.

Darr3n 0

Sunday 2 September 2012 17:27

you arent bringing up your kid right and your kids an idiot to be honest.

doodlecloud 26

Monday 3 September 2012 11:06

Aaaaand I've now learnt that showering before bed is apparently a thing. Is it followed by another shower in the morning or just a wash? If the former then why bother with the first (unless you obviously had a really dirty day)? If the latter...well, that's just gross. You sweat so much when you sleep, you've gotta have a shower afterwards. Dunno why you'd include that particular line to show how bad your kid is, seems like a valid question.