Kids: Today, I had to go into school for the third time this week because...

By Anonymous - 07/09/2012 05:08 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I had to go into school for the third time this week because my son is claiming he's on bath salts and biting all his classmates. My son is 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 739

You deserved it 3 337

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

By afather - 14/06/2015 13:41 - United States - Worthing

Today, I had to take my son to the hospital for drinking sunscreen. Apparently, he saw something on the internet that said if he drank it, his body would sweat it out and continually apply it to his body. He's 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 399

You deserved it 6 533

By Ramis182 - 03/10/2011 04:26 - United States

Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 757

You deserved it 6 027

By Unsanitary - 26/06/2011 10:32 - United Kingdom

Today, my daughter spent three hours crying and having a temper tantrum over being forced to have a bath after four days without one. My daughter is 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 442

You deserved it 11 053

By eenkoekje - 13/05/2011 07:20

Today, I was called by my son's school to pick him up. Apparently, he snorted baking soda, crushed aspirin, and flour because he thought it was coke. Where did I go wrong raising this twerp? FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 328

You deserved it 15 918

Reported!

By thatcreepyteacher - 17/02/2016 04:27 - United States - Mchenry

Today, someone called the police on me because one of my students was going home with me every day. The student is my son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 847

You deserved it 1 438

Not too fond of the chair

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my son threw the biggest fit in history about going to the dentist. He broke a whole stack of plates, overflowed the bathtub, let the dog loose, and kicked his father when he tried to calm him down. My son is 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 859

You deserved it 36 531

By Anonymous - 11/05/2012 19:30 - Sweden - G?teborg

Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 830

You deserved it 4 240

By George Saunders - 21/03/2012 04:06 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I accused my son of faking being sick. He then blew chunks all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 084

You deserved it 53 495

I'm a rebel, mom!

By SheenaL - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my son is going through a rebellious phase. He's taken to wearing leather and chains, listening to death metal music all day in his room alone, and screaming at me in public places. He was fired from his part-time job for swearing at customers. My son is 29 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 192

You deserved it 13 905

Asshat of the day

By Ariane - 28/11/2022 12:00 - Belgium - Brussels

Today, my son's school called me at work to let me know my son had broken his leg playing soccer, so I had to come and take him to hospital. I told my boss I had to leave, explaining why. He asked, "How old is your son? - 16. - He's 16 and he still needs his mother? You're not leaving!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 135

You deserved it 71

dogpfcorn 11

Friday 7 September 2012 11:43

Mother of god.....the zombies are coming

nikininja 4

Friday 7 September 2012 11:45

He is lucky no one took him seriously and took a baseball bat to him!

Comments

Boob_fml 6

Friday 7 September 2012 14:42

16 and still no girlfriend I see..

supportcommand 17

Friday 7 September 2012 14:59

Your son. Not the brightest crayon in the box. ( prev FML comment ) needs to repeat a grade maybe. Or pretend like you believe him and send him to rehab. Or boot camp.

sdotimas 1

Friday 7 September 2012 15:23

My generation is in BAD shape.

makeupjunkie 5

Friday 7 September 2012 15:45

This is a little disturbing.

Tavers 19

Friday 7 September 2012 17:01

Your picture is waaay more disturbing.

makeupjunkie 5

Friday 7 September 2012 18:52

Thank you.

DocBastard 38

Friday 7 September 2012 15:51

Children are also influenced by the entire world around them, including their friends. It drives me bat-shit crazy when someone tries to blame parents for everything. If a kid doesn't know how to use a fork properly, blame the parents. But children spend more time away from their parents than with them, and much of their behaviour is learned from their experiences away from home.

Ibeatmyself 3

Friday 7 September 2012 15:51

see what happens when u don't hit ur kids

skyeyez9 24

Friday 7 September 2012 16:17

I hope the kids who were bit by your sociopath son beat his ass! That is the only way he will stop hurting others is to know he has a very high chance of getting his ass kicked if he decides to violate someone.

congele 6

Friday 7 September 2012 17:07

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm on bath salts, and your face looks tasty ;)

olpally 32

Friday 7 September 2012 17:20

Sorry 52, but number 9 beat you by over 5 hours with that comment... Lol, nice try.

trulymickeyj 13

Saturday 8 September 2012 7:11

Two other people said that....

CombatMayhem 5

Friday 7 September 2012 18:00

You raised a moron.

MaryPoppins88 14

Friday 7 September 2012 18:01

Omg first of all that guy who supposedly was on bath salts while he ate the other mans face actually only had marijuana in his system and FYL indeed for having such a dumbass child