Intimacy: Today, I had to hide some Oreos inside my bra to motivate my...

By . - 05/08/2016 16:57 - Germany - Neuwied

Today, I had to hide some Oreos inside my bra to motivate my husband to get close to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 206

You deserved it 1 874

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Same thing different taste

Be careful what you wish for…

By Sady_Ct - 15/05/2019 12:12

Today, I caught my husband trying on the sexy bra I bought to wear just for him. For shits and giggles, I made him try on my dress too. He looked better in it than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 540

You deserved it 561

By Anonymous - 08/02/2012 05:04

Today, I caught my boyfriend trying on my bra. He still has no excuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 166

You deserved it 4 218

By Anonymous - 31/05/2015 20:36 - United States - Temecula

Today, my girlfriend is angry with me. We had an argument on how to properly eat an Oreo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 765

You deserved it 6 083

By Courtney - 04/02/2012 20:22 - Reserved

Today, I tried to inconspicuously hock a loogie. It went down my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 464

You deserved it 34 691

By Anonymous - 02/01/2011 00:51 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend told me to stuff my bra before going to a party with him and his friends because he didn't want to be embarrassed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 559

You deserved it 5 182

By Anonymous - 20/08/2012 12:12 - United States - Worcester

Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 361

You deserved it 5 922

Sorry sweaty

By Tori - 05/02/2009 15:24 - United States

Today, I discovered a drawer full of chocolates, cookies and baked goods in my house. When I asked my sister what the drawer was, she told me that my mom thought it would be a good idea to hide the fattening foods from me. My entire family had known about the food drawer, except me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 555

You deserved it 8 379

Maybe he is gay!

By Anonymous - 27/12/2017 05:00

Today, my boyfriend got back from a long wrestling tournament. As a nice surprise, I decided to give him a little show over FaceTime. As soon as I stripped down into my bra and underwear, he paused the screen and started surfing the internet for new shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 67

By NotInTheRightPlace - 17/03/2014 18:18 - United States - Falls Church

Today, I had to appear in court. My boyfriend gave me a chocolate to eat for comfort. The quote on the wrapper read "Today, you are exactly where you should be." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 077

You deserved it 6 535

Bad sign

By Filing for divorce - 27/11/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, my husband thought I was still asleep while he was getting ready for work. How do I know? I watched him grab a condom out of his nightstand and put it in his lunchbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 705

You deserved it 88

stryder9090 28

Saturday 6 August 2016 20:42

Oreos and ****? Doesn't get much better than that

Lustig_Junge 16

Saturday 6 August 2016 20:44

Well, Oreos go breast with milk! ;D

Comments

kevinsagirl2323 8

Thursday 9 November 2017 23:17

that's gross and pathetic.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my sister was concerned that her daughter (my niece) was sick, and hesitant to take her to the ER. I asked if she'd eaten something she shouldn't have, and she replied, "No, especially since we feed her the most healthy food we can." This was fine until I flipped out when she said, "We even give her raw milk so that she'll be strong." FML

I agree, your life sucks 428

You deserved it 120

Today, I was been accused of stealing lunches from the fridge at work. I’m a huge germaphobe and would NEVER eat someone else’s food, but because I’m the fattest one in the office, everyone automatically blamed me. Hashtag fatgirlproblems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 131

The Top

Today, I found that my medical school has lost its WFME (World Federation for Medical Education) accreditation and my certificate (that I should be obtaining in two years) will be worthless. To pour salt into the wound, I have finals next week and it's hard to stay motivated after this kind of news. FML

I agree, your life sucks 566

You deserved it 79

Today, my nana tried to drown my pet rat because it's white with red eyes, and red eyes mean it’s Satan in disguise, and yet my mom still refuses to admit she needs to be in a nursing home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 054

You deserved it 123

Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 792

You deserved it 4 108

Today, I closed my eyes while my boyfriend was fingering me, and I felt a cold liquid inside me. I opened my eyes, and he was pouring yogurt into me. He said “I wanted to try something new.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 483

You deserved it 468

Today, the cute coworker who's been flirting with me drove me home. While I was contemplating asking him to kiss me, he politely told me to, "Please get out, I promised my girlfriend I'd pick her up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 100

You deserved it 1 071

Today, I had a brain fart moment while asking out a cute guy. I meant to say, "When are you going to let me take you out for coffee?” but what actually came out of my mouth was, “When are you going to let me do you?” He turned bright red and I ran away, and I’m too scared to go back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 755

You deserved it 298