Intimacy: Today, I had to hide some Oreos inside my bra to motivate my...

By . - 05/08/2016 16:57 - Germany - Neuwied

Today, I had to hide some Oreos inside my bra to motivate my husband to get close to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 206

You deserved it 1 874

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Be careful what you wish for…

By Sady_Ct - 15/05/2019 12:12

Today, I caught my husband trying on the sexy bra I bought to wear just for him. For shits and giggles, I made him try on my dress too. He looked better in it than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 538

You deserved it 561

By Anonymous - 08/02/2012 05:04

Today, I caught my boyfriend trying on my bra. He still has no excuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 165

You deserved it 4 218

By Anonymous - 31/05/2015 20:36 - United States - Temecula

Today, my girlfriend is angry with me. We had an argument on how to properly eat an Oreo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 765

You deserved it 6 083

By Courtney - 04/02/2012 20:22 - Reserved

Today, I tried to inconspicuously hock a loogie. It went down my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 464

You deserved it 34 690

By Anonymous - 02/01/2011 00:51 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend told me to stuff my bra before going to a party with him and his friends because he didn't want to be embarrassed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 559

You deserved it 5 182

By Anonymous - 20/08/2012 12:12 - United States - Worcester

Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 361

You deserved it 5 922

Sorry sweaty

By Tori - 05/02/2009 15:24 - United States

Today, I discovered a drawer full of chocolates, cookies and baked goods in my house. When I asked my sister what the drawer was, she told me that my mom thought it would be a good idea to hide the fattening foods from me. My entire family had known about the food drawer, except me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 555

You deserved it 8 379

Maybe he is gay!

By Anonymous - 27/12/2017 05:00

Today, my boyfriend got back from a long wrestling tournament. As a nice surprise, I decided to give him a little show over FaceTime. As soon as I stripped down into my bra and underwear, he paused the screen and started surfing the internet for new shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 67

By NotInTheRightPlace - 17/03/2014 18:18 - United States - Falls Church

Today, I had to appear in court. My boyfriend gave me a chocolate to eat for comfort. The quote on the wrapper read "Today, you are exactly where you should be." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 076

You deserved it 6 535

Bad sign

By Filing for divorce - 27/11/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, my husband thought I was still asleep while he was getting ready for work. How do I know? I watched him grab a condom out of his nightstand and put it in his lunchbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 672

You deserved it 81

stryder9090 28

Saturday 6 August 2016 20:42

Oreos and ****? Doesn't get much better than that

Lustig_Junge 16

Saturday 6 August 2016 20:44

Well, Oreos go breast with milk! ;D

Comments

stryder9090 28

Saturday 6 August 2016 20:42

Oreos and ****? Doesn't get much better than that

salmanch 15

Saturday 6 August 2016 20:43

Level.... of motivation ?

Lustig_Junge 16

Saturday 6 August 2016 20:44

Well, Oreos go breast with milk! ;D

blvcklvnd69 14

Sunday 7 August 2016 0:47

Lol I'm not going to lie I had to read that again to get it. Nice pun btw!

enxhi96 21

Saturday 6 August 2016 20:48

Food is a good bribe for anything

vinnie_boombotz 15

Saturday 6 August 2016 20:52

Have him lick the cream off you

Sannekee 18

Saturday 6 August 2016 21:12

I know how it feels. I'm not sure pesos oreos will work for me at this point in our marriage :(

Ramisme 12

Sunday 7 August 2016 22:55

maybe try communicating.

tygerarmy 35

Saturday 6 August 2016 21:13

Having an Oreo that was dipped in breasts is better than an Oreo dipped in milk, though they are very similar.

species4872 19

Saturday 6 August 2016 21:14

Mmmmmm Oreos

xx000o 27

Sunday 7 August 2016 12:43

Mmmmmm breastst!!!

jcash52426 5

Saturday 6 August 2016 21:27

Isn't that uncomfortable? Why not lose the bra and cover yourself with whip cream

Felling 14

Sunday 7 August 2016 6:54

This dude knows what's up.

Bearsmomma 30

Monday 8 August 2016 7:53

I'm uncomfortable thinking about all those crumbs!

cuz803 44

Saturday 6 August 2016 21:32

Use it. It's OK to use food and objects to spicen up your sex appeal.

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The Top

Today, I was at a wedding reception with loud music. A guy told me that his sister couldn't be there because she "went home to be with her boy." I said, "That's too bad, she's missing a great party." He paused and repeated, "She went home to be with her LORD." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 263

You deserved it 4 813

Today, I finally met my dream woman: a smokin’ hot green-eyed petite redhead. Or so I thought. I met her online and “she” turned out to be a 22 year-old guy trolling me. The worst part is that I separated from my wife for this girl. She won’t take me back no matter how much I beg and plead. FML

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I agree, your life sucks 835

You deserved it 92

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me via Twitter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 968

You deserved it 3 865

Today, my ex-fiancé got married. He left me at the altar last year because the thought of marriage and “taking such a big step” scared him. He’s only been with his new girlfriend for 6 months. Apparently I’m not good enough to marry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 348

You deserved it 149

Today, I've been unemployed for a year. For the last six months I had been trying for a good paying job at a great company, who kept saying they would hire me when the economy improves. Three weeks ago I gave up and moved 2 hours away. Guess who just called to finally offer me a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 130

You deserved it 3 704

Today, I was out shopping with my little sister. I wanted to try something on, so I put my bag in front of a changing room and jokingly told her to bark if someone came near. She ended up biting a lady who was trying to get into one of the changing rooms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 457

You deserved it 85

Today, I finally convinced a girl that I liked to have sex. I decided to swoop her off the feet like the movies and carry her to my bed. I ended up hitting her head on the door frame, knocking her out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 066

You deserved it 86 735