Miscellaneous: Today, I had to take a urine test. I drank a lot of water so...

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By Tib - 18/12/2009 06:42 - United States

Today, I had to take a urine test. I drank a lot of water so that I wouldn't force it. When I got there, I had to pee really bad. The cup was too small and when I relieved my bladder, it was a jet that rebounded off of the cup and overflowed going all over my hands, clothes, toilet, and floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 393

You deserved it 26 486

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Same thing different taste

By killme - 29/02/2016 07:00 - Canada - Belleville

Today, I had to pee in a cup. The cup almost overflowed. My first instinct was to drink some so it didn't spill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 556

You deserved it 23 586

By Anonymous - 05/04/2014 23:16 - United States - Windsor Heights

Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of pee all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 421

You deserved it 6 447

By overflowing - 16/04/2011 22:20 - United States

Today, I had to take a mandatory drug test with the doctor present. Nervous, I couldn't get myself to pee in the cup right away. When I finally did, I couldn't stop myself from overfilling the cup and getting pee all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 200

You deserved it 8 672

Straining

By NoPeeGiven - 14/04/2013 05:10 - United States - Palatine

Today, I had to go to the clinic for a physical. The nurse asked me for a pee sample; however, I had no urine to give. After 20 minutes of standing at the stall I was able to squeeze half a cup of pee. As I approached the sink to cover the sample, I somehow managed to drop it all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 895

You deserved it 9 991

By urinanalysis - 03/12/2009 16:08 - Canada

Today, I went to get blood and urine tests done before work. As I was attempting to aim into the cup, I lost balance and slipped. I ended up peeing on my sleeves and my pants. I was late for work and I smelled like pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 372

You deserved it 7 314

Are you taking the piss?

By Anonymous - 28/05/2019 14:00

Today, I was being drug tested as part of a pre-employment policy for substitute teaching. Once I had peed in the cup enough to pass the line, I put it on the only available space: the toilet paper holder. Trying to get toilet paper, I knocked the cup over, spilling pee all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 526

You deserved it 917

By Aciliveth - 10/06/2010 16:07 - Canada

Today, I had to get an ultrasound, which required me to drink 3 glasses of water beforehand. The doctor said I had too much and told me to go pee out just a little and come back. It took a lot of effort to hold the rest in. The first thing she did when I got back was press on my abdomen. I peed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 080

You deserved it 4 446

By slaughterteddy - 20/07/2016 23:23 - United States

Today, I spent two hours trying to catch a urine sample whilst at urgent care due to my inability to pee in public restrooms. I finally managed one, and was so excited by my success that I fumbled it and spilled it on my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 047

You deserved it 2 549

By analbel - 05/11/2018 12:00

Today, I had to get a urine analysis done for my doctor. I take medicine that makes me a little shaky sometimes. Guess who spilled their pee all over themselves while trying to put the lid on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 851

You deserved it 219

AKA taking a screenshot

By Anonymous - 05/10/2020 11:02 - United States - White Plains

Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 115

You deserved it 398

haweb 0

Friday 18 December 2009 12:25

When you take a urine test, you're supposed to pee for a second or two before you actually fill the cup. I don't remember right now what they call it for that first two seconds, but yeh. They even have instructions on most walls.

Sparkey 0

Friday 18 December 2009 12:26

For urine tests it's best to take a sample from the middle of your urination. That is, pee a little first, to get rid of any build up, then take sample, then finish peeing. That way the doctor gets the best sample, and you don't pee all over yourself :P

Comments

CallMeHush 0

Friday 18 December 2009 19:23

By the time your old enough to take a piss test and write about it you should have control of your dick, YDI.

hellyjellybean 0

Friday 18 December 2009 19:55

Errm why do people always assume it's a guy- I bet this is a girl.. it's a lot more difficult if you're a girl and you haven't got a handy pipe to aim with.

pnckswthsrp 0

Friday 18 December 2009 20:23

They probably assume it's a guy as the FML says it's a guy. (:

alexFYL 11

Friday 18 December 2009 20:50

Because the OP listed himself as a male. Also, it's easy for girls to pee in a cup. If girls ever have an issue with peeing in a cup... there is some logic fail going on there. You can jam the cup right up against your mound, that way nothing splashes out. Girls can also pee standing up, but we have less aim than males, obviously. We can also pee out a car but it requires a little odd maneuvering and probably mooning anyone else around. And peeing in a beer bottle is an advanced technique. :P

College_Wrestler 0

Friday 18 December 2009 19:39

that is why you let a little bit out first dumb ass

hellyjellybean 0

Friday 18 December 2009 19:52

Oops yeah I can sympathise, I have to do a urine test every month, last time they gave me a narrow little tube instead of a pot... I'd drunk a litre of orange juice beforehand and my pee did kind of overflow but at least it wasn't as disastrous as in your experience, cos I thought to myself, it would kind of suck to emerge covered in piss so I was as careful as I could be with weak pelvic floor muscles. But we all do silly things... I'm sure you learned your lesson- establish a steady stream and then fill it up. XD

SNOTTYBONES 0

Friday 18 December 2009 22:12

Yea I drank a bunch of water before one and I had to go back and do it again the next day because the test came back as being deluded. Hey at least I made it in the cup. I just have a hard time going with strangers listening to me outside the door. The bathroom was right in the middle of the room. It was like a stall and everyone could see your feet. I hated it. LOL

R0lling_St0ner 0

Friday 18 December 2009 22:25

ok so the reason you piss for a little before you fill up the sample cup is because all the when in your bladder the THC is heavyer then your piss so you flush out you bladder and give them less of a sample to detect, and as for having people listen to you take a piss how about having someone wacth you piss now THAT is wierd

pancakegremlin 0

Friday 18 December 2009 23:23

You = 1 Crazy ex-gf janitor = 0

NotNegativeNews 0

Saturday 19 December 2009 1:10

It's true though- they want you to wee for a bit, stop, then restart into the cup, something about flushing out your urethra a bit I believe, so that the urine is clean. Also it'd stop this whole 'it won't fit in the cup!' and jet splatter problems.