Health: Today, I had to take a mandatory drug test with the doctor present....

FML for mobile
Free

By overflowing - 16/04/2011 22:20 - United States

Today, I had to take a mandatory drug test with the doctor present. Nervous, I couldn't get myself to pee in the cup right away. When I finally did, I couldn't stop myself from overfilling the cup and getting pee all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 199

You deserved it 8 672

Epic Easter: Chases and Chutes
From egg hunts gone wrong to unforgettable family dinners, Easter has never been so much fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 05/04/2014 23:16 - United States - Windsor Heights

Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of pee all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 418

You deserved it 6 446

By Tib - 18/12/2009 06:42 - United States

Today, I had to take a urine test. I drank a lot of water so that I wouldn't force it. When I got there, I had to pee really bad. The cup was too small and when I relieved my bladder, it was a jet that rebounded off of the cup and overflowed going all over my hands, clothes, toilet, and floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 392

You deserved it 26 483

Are you taking the piss?

By Anonymous - 28/05/2019 14:00

Today, I was being drug tested as part of a pre-employment policy for substitute teaching. Once I had peed in the cup enough to pass the line, I put it on the only available space: the toilet paper holder. Trying to get toilet paper, I knocked the cup over, spilling pee all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 522

You deserved it 917

By killme - 29/02/2016 07:00 - Canada - Belleville

Today, I had to pee in a cup. The cup almost overflowed. My first instinct was to drink some so it didn't spill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 556

You deserved it 23 584

Straining

By NoPeeGiven - 14/04/2013 05:10 - United States - Palatine

Today, I had to go to the clinic for a physical. The nurse asked me for a pee sample; however, I had no urine to give. After 20 minutes of standing at the stall I was able to squeeze half a cup of pee. As I approached the sink to cover the sample, I somehow managed to drop it all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 893

You deserved it 9 991

By heck - 12/08/2016 13:57

Today, I took a drug test. Not only did I fail the drug test, but I mostly missed the sample cup and got urine all over my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 155

You deserved it 18 532

By analbel - 05/11/2018 12:00

Today, I had to get a urine analysis done for my doctor. I take medicine that makes me a little shaky sometimes. Guess who spilled their pee all over themselves while trying to put the lid on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 850

You deserved it 219

Waste of time

By Anonymous - 23/03/2025 06:00 - United States - Belton

Today, the lab wouldn't let me do my pre-employment drug test because they had no time when I had to pee really bad. They signed me in to do other blood work I needed, but when I asked to use the bathroom, they said it was for drug testing only. I peed myself in the lobby and couldn't do the blood test either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 434

You deserved it 86

By urinanalysis - 03/12/2009 16:08 - Canada

Today, I went to get blood and urine tests done before work. As I was attempting to aim into the cup, I lost balance and slipped. I ended up peeing on my sleeves and my pants. I was late for work and I smelled like pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 371

You deserved it 7 314

By Anonymous - 10/06/2016 17:02 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to take a drug test for my new job, which I desperately need and which took me over a year to land. I got a shy bladder and couldn't pee. They marked me as non-compliant and revoked the job offer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 717

You deserved it 1 318

Gift_fml 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:50

haha, thats funny

kingtz 6

Sunday 17 April 2011 2:12

1 girl 1 cup: the golden shower edition?

Comments

cole86 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:50

haha

Gift_fml 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:50

haha, thats funny

juliahockey 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:53

that's not funny. that's disgusting.

InsidiousChild 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:55

it made me smile.

juliahockey 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:57

smile? it would be disgusting if pee was all over you, not smile-worthy.

juliahockey 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:59

smile? that's just weird. if pee was overflowing, it would probably be more gross then funny.

the_pan1c 5

Sunday 17 April 2011 2:55

it sounds kike something id do... :(

staceysgenesis16 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 3:37

hahaha i can imagine ur face while doing this LMAO thats just amazing

Docbee 11

Sunday 17 April 2011 3:48

i think i saw this fml before...?

soccerluv05 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 4:05

sounds to me like someone can't control their bladder haha

nygunns1 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 4:55

I had sorta the same problem. haha I had to take a drug test for my parents, I was mad nervous knowing I'll fail and I stood there for like 5 minutes cause I was to scared to pee. once it started it didn't stop...

gangstathug 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 6:02

ydi for being a dirty drug user

MuffyStJacques 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 6:28

I would fail a drug test. THC and MDMA would be found and I'd be dead.

JJ123456 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 6:56

sucks

AsianCookie247 14

Sunday 17 April 2011 7:51

hahaha that's ****** greaaat.

elainelovesyou 7

Sunday 17 April 2011 8:05

#1 - agreed. haha.

irokyoursox 6

Sunday 17 April 2011 8:39

57 don't take pictures with your shirt off if you don't have muscles

182crazyking 9

Sunday 17 April 2011 9:30

If they drug tested me the'd find deadly amounts of Charlie Sheen.

nxlcorey 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 14:19

# 87 - WIN

zakkyzebra 11

Sunday 17 April 2011 15:38

85, who the **** are you to tell people what kind of pictures they can or cannot take when you don't have a picture of yourself? You don't need muscles to take a picture with your shirt off. Imagine if that's the rule EVERYONE went by. I would find pictures of topless girls revolting, then.

staceysgenesis16 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 18:04

85 please shut up .. its not about him taking a picture with his shirt off .. thats not the point of FML .. please go away .. people can do watever they want .. obviously hes just comfertable with his body ..

Takador 3

Sunday 17 April 2011 22:33

thats retarded couldnt you just keep peeing in the toilet?

pksparrow53 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 23:26

117 I agree

Kennzz 0

Sunday 2 October 2011 0:28

Yeah, you pee over the toilet and simply move the cup when it's full and finish peeing.

octinate 17

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:52

bladder control fail

aquariusangel420 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 3:43

how do you know it's a dude lol

afdude87 6

Sunday 17 April 2011 4:31

weird...

enonymous 8

Sunday 17 April 2011 4:46

I had problems like this once. went in for a drug test and accidentally took a shit in the cup. Although they found no drugs try recommended more fiber.

enonymous 8

Sunday 17 April 2011 4:48

They*

dirtyblond 4

Sunday 17 April 2011 5:18

Hahahahhahah oh maann!..

FatElie 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 10:58

It's almost impossible to stop it once it starts

mydesire 5

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:53

ha thats both funny and disgusting. fyl

xXshadowrollerXx 6

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:53

I hope you cleaned that up, you dirty young man.

jandera 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 15:57

who says it's a man?

deeroseryan 8

Sunday 17 April 2011 16:11

exactly!

cookie_3008 4

Sunday 17 April 2011 17:09

Are you serious?? Of course it is a man!! There is no way a doctor would come into the stall with a girl.. *eye roll*. Even if the doctor was a woman, she would know how awkward it would be. It's just simple logic.

Sprocket 5

Sunday 17 April 2011 17:19

What logic? My logic says that a doctor would follow a patient in the case of a drug test. male or female. Y'know, so they can't switch their pee with a sample they brought from pre-drug times.

Tuesdays76 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 20:47

Ya that's just too easy to cheat that test.

Eggers 2

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:54

Admit it, you just wanted to get the doctor back.

maa_rico 4

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:54

Light a joint buddy, soon you'll fell all better.

RPattzs_gurl 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 4:45

^pic win xD

MrGold 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 12:32

pic fail

girlylaxfool 3

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:56

sucker

hotchick90037 3

Sunday 17 April 2011 1:59

well that's what you get for doing drugs!

MrBobby_fml 7

Sunday 17 April 2011 3:13

Cept he woulda got drug tested whether he was doing drugs or not.... that's what a test is for... to find out. Anyways, yar, can people not STOP themselves peeing mid-stream? I get a bit of dribble, so stop just before you need! I don't find my uncontrollable penis rules me... when he wants to pee, he PEES! No matter what I'm doing! No....