Health: Today, I have Hello Kitty band-aids on my nips because I dozed...

By extra crispy or original recipe - 16/02/2014 22:23 - United States - Grand Prairie

Today, I have Hello Kitty band-aids on my nips because I dozed off while tanning and burned them extra crispy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 537

You deserved it 42 853

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Same thing different taste

By twnty1 - 31/05/2010 15:43 - United States

Today, I discovered that I'm allergic to band-aids. I now have a band-aid shaped rash around a tiny cut on my leg. Oh the irony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 185

You deserved it 4 073

Lookin' good

By racoonface - 19/04/2009 15:17 - United States

Today, it was lovely outside so I decided to tan outside. I burn pretty easily, so I put on sunscreen. I fell asleep on my side, so when I woke up, I had a massive burn on only one side of my body, with sunglass lines. Tomorrow, I have a job interview. I'm going to go in looking like a racoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 680

You deserved it 54 755

By maggie2014 - 23/06/2013 23:48 - United States - Lufkin

Today, I fell asleep listening to my music and tanning at the beach. Not only did I wake up with a sunburn, but my iPhone had been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 313

You deserved it 28 812

By Steve - 24/02/2011 19:32 - United States

Today, I put aftershave on my fingers to encourage myself to stop biting my nails. I absentmindedly rubbed my eye a few minutes later. It burnt like hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 678

You deserved it 36 219

By irony - 16/08/2009 07:05 - United States

Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 941

You deserved it 9 372

By kaylajere - 26/05/2010 08:17 - United States

Today, I decided to lay out and tan. I fell asleep and got sun burned and bitten numerous times by mosquitoes. If I scratch my itch, the burn hurts terribly. If I don't scratch it, it itches terribly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 170

You deserved it 36 796

By Bunsofpain - 16/06/2016 18:56 - United States

Today I got sunburned on my cheeks. This wouldn't be too bad if they were the ones on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 227

You deserved it 4 276

By Anonymous - 24/11/2018 09:30 - United States - Henderson

Today, I decided to take a relaxing shower. My face mask made my face break out in hives. While exfoliating, my nipples became chafed. Then I slipped and cut myself while shaving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 691

You deserved it 352

By Anonymous - 01/06/2018 06:00

Today, my new bikini must be cheap as shit because I tanned nicely where I put on sunscreen, but where I didn’t apply it under the bikini I’ve gotten super red sunburn on my butt, my lady bits, and my boobs. My nipples look like the ends of red felt tip pens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 641

You deserved it 838

By anonymous - 24/09/2011 15:22 - United States

Today, I was badly sunburnt even after making it a point to apply a lot of sunscreen. My coworkers thought it amusing to slap me every chance they get. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 396

You deserved it 4 719

AmAzInG123456789 10

Monday 17 February 2014 1:45

I hear if you add a little pepper, crispy nips can be a nice party appetizer.

JustKittyKat 24

Monday 17 February 2014 1:46

Hello titty I dub thee "Bacon Nips"

Comments

Mysterious_one 26

Monday 17 February 2014 4:35

lol... extra crispy? lol..

Robert1989 9

Monday 17 February 2014 4:39

awe that's more of a hell no kitty situation

hillbilly254 1

Monday 17 February 2014 4:55

If you need someone to kiss them better...

CyberGothic 16

Monday 17 February 2014 5:29

I second the motion.

Nish007 15

Monday 17 February 2014 5:18

pics or it didnt happen lol

martin8337 35

Monday 17 February 2014 5:33

I hope that OP is a female.

BlameTheOwls 14

Monday 17 February 2014 6:04

A lot of apartment complexes in my area have free tanning beds. Don't know whether they have timers or not...

natheitz 23

Monday 17 February 2014 6:31

You could always wear normal band aids

maplecandy 7

Monday 17 February 2014 6:45

Holy shit, OW

Witchylady 17

Monday 17 February 2014 7:08

Sucked in

BakedBeanz 2

Monday 17 February 2014 7:34

YDI for not wearing sunscreen while being outside in the sun. Do you want to get skin cancer?

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Today, my husband filed for divorce. He also put himself “In a relationship” with my daughter on Facebook. She turned 18 a few days ago. He says it’s no big deal because, “at least I waited until she was legal.” The spineless idiot just doesn’t get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 087

You deserved it 160

Today, I noticed a flashy car badly parking itself in a handicapped space. I hate the asshats who do this, so I went up to berate the driver. After an opening salvo of coarse language, a glint of light on his wheelchair in the back caught my eye. I then had to apologise for being a shitehawk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 623

You deserved it 42 687

The Top

Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 182

You deserved it 15 066

Today, I packed up to get ready to move to my boyfriend’s. I just graduated high school and I don’t get along with his mom, but I have no other choice of living. I was supposed to move in with his family tomorrow but now his mom won’t let me. It was last minute, and I’m basically homeless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 020

You deserved it 344

Today, it was my birthday. Some 17 year-olds will receive cars as presents from their parents. Mine, however, booked me a plot in the local graveyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 586

You deserved it 5 314

Today, my co-workers and I have to fight for our jobs because of a mistake our managers made. They get to keep their jobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 223

You deserved it 385

Today, I found out my boss wrote me up because he heard me crying on the phone, and that it was unprofessional. I was talking to my sister, who was telling that me my father had died. Three weeks ago, he was crying about his dog breaking his leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 820

You deserved it 100

Today, my dad came home from work early only to walk in on me and the boy I'm not supposed to be seeing having sex. Did I mention doggie style? FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 398

You deserved it 32 903

Same thing different taste

Lookin' good

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